The Eyes of the Father
by Scooplet
Summary: As her wedding approaches, Sarah is faced with many troubling challenges, including one that will shape her relationship with her father in the years to come. Lee must face his own demons and come to terms with one of the greatest difficulties of being a parent: learning how to let go. Sixth installment in the Deja Vu series.
1. Chapter 1

Written by Scooplet

Concept by Cheryl and Scooplet

Scarecrow and Mrs. King characters are the property of Shoot the Moon Productions and Warner Bros. Television. No copyright infringement intended. Not for commercial use. Sarah Stetson, Matt Granger, and the other characters not found in the television show are my creation, however, so please respect my right to claim ownership of them—I do not authorize permission to use them in stories not authored by me.

Note on the story: While I always try to be as accurate as possible with the details of my stories, including the legal procedures mentioned in this one, I don't pretend to be an expert in the matters of law practice. Thanks in advance for overlooking any factual inaccuracies (hopefully minor) and for the kindness and encouragement I have received so far with my previous stories.

The Eyes of the Father

His left hand gripped her arm painfully while his other hand held the knife against her throat. Something warm and wet was on her skin there. She thought vaguely that perhaps his knife had broken the skin, but she ignored the pain. She was conscious of only fear. Not fear for herself. Fear for him. She knew he had been hurt. Hurt badly. She watched as he struggled to his feet, his anguished eyes on her. Was he in pain? She heard voices, and then she was being dragged away. _No! I can't leave him. He'll die. Let go of me! He needs me! He's hurt._ Just as she was ready to fight her captor, knife or not, time seemed to jump ahead. She found herself struggling to her feet—why was it so hard to stand up on her own?—and rushing to him. There was so much blood. And the wounds were so horrible. He was fighting for every breath. _Oh no! Please stay with me._ She screamed in terror and desperation. "No!"

Sarah Stetson awoke with a start, her breathing erratic, the intensity of the fear and helplessness still gripping her middle. Reaching up, she found her cheeks were wet. _No doubt it's from the dream. It isn't real. Matt's alive and he's well again_. She stared out in the dark, trying to make sense of her surroundings. She was in her apartment over the garage of her parents' Arlington, Virginia home. The same house on Maplewood Drive where she had grown up and where her older brothers had grown up before her.

After a few moments she reoriented. She and Matt had flown back to D.C. on Saturday after a visit to see his family in Texas. Tomorrow—or was it today?—was her first day at the Agency. The emotions brought on by the dream began to ebb. _Maybe that's why the nightmare came back. I'm nervous. Come on, girl. What did Dr. Kirby tell you to do when you had a nightmare? _In an effort to calm herself, Sarah searched her mind for something positive to think about._ Sunday was so busy. Church, finishing the invitations, then making dinner with Matt while we worked on some of our laundry together at the house. That was kind of fun. Sort of like practicing for marriage—just like Pastor Carlson suggested. _She almost laughed out loud at herself—she had gotten up early to wash her underwear so Matt would not see it with the rest of her laundry. If Matt had noticed that Sarah had gotten a head start, he did not say anything. _Sheesh, you ninny. He'll see you in your underwear soon enough. Less than six weeks._

Sarah blushed and forced her thoughts to their efforts in the kitchen. They had made enough of the chicken dish for leftovers to share with her parents. Lee and Amanda would be home that afternoon from London, and Sarah knew she and Matt would want something easy when he stopped by after her first day of work.

_Work!_ I really need to get back to sleep. Curling up on her side, Sarah let her thoughts wander to the latest book she had been reading in the hopes that would help her to drift off.

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"You never told me what you and Sarah talked about last night." Lee Stetson stretched out his long legs, enjoying the extra room afforded to first class passengers. He often took advantage of his connection at the airline, justifying it to himself with the notion that it was more secure for someone with his history and list of enemies to ride in first class. And the flight from Heathrow to Dulles was long enough to make it more than worth it. He idly ran a hand through his silver hair and looked over at his wife.

Amanda lifted her reading glasses off of her nose and pushed them up to the top her head, allowing them to hold her shoulder length, dark hair away from her face. She looked up from the book she was reading. "Oh, well—let's see... The flight from Austin was uneventful. They finished the wedding invitations with Amy, Jennifer, and Jessica's help. Sarah and Matt dropped them in the mail on the way back to the house. They were making dinner."

"Those two act married. They just don't sleep under the same roof."

"Hey, we used to cook together sometimes when we were dating. Even so, can you blame them for being spending so much time together? They've been through a lot." Amanda grew thoughtful, her expression soft. "Besides, they're sweet with one another. And they'll be married in less than six weeks."

"Yeah," he muttered distractedly in response to Amanda's ramble. Lee did not need the reminder of why Sarah and Matt's relationship had grown serious so quickly. He was struggling with his own memories of the three attempts to abduct Sarah. The day in the park haunted him regularly now. Begrudgingly he admitted to himself that his appointment with Kirby had been postponed too long. Tuesday was not soon enough. While he had enjoyed their stay in London together, the first portion of their trip to Great Britain had been stressful. Thinking they were there for a vacation, they had ended up on a case with possible ramifications for Amanda's reputation and their family's security. But after getting help from Emily Farnsworth and her team from MI6, their old nemesis, Sonja Chenko, was behind bars and no longer able to cause them trouble.

Watching Lee for a moment and wondering at his pensive behavior, Amanda decided not to press him. Something was on his mind besides the Chenko case. She knew he would talk when he was ready. Picking up her book and adjusting her glasses on her nose once again, she began to read.

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"Well, hello. Are you new?"

Looking up from the computer screen where she was filling out new hire "paperwork," Sarah smiled at the sight of her fiancé, Matt Granger, standing in the doorway. While she admired Matt in just about anything he wore, she liked seeing him in his classically-cut suits the best. He was wearing a charcoal gray two-piece today with a white shirt and a blue patterned tie that intensified the color of his gray eyes and accentuated his dark blond, almost brown hair. The jacket was open, giving Matt a relaxed, yet confident appearance, while at the same time showing off his tall, well-muscled body. She forced herself not to ogle and laughed a little at his flirty greeting.

"Hi."

He warmed to her quiet, friendly voice and soft laugh. _It's going to be nice having Sarah working at the Agency, too._ He never tired of watching her, whatever she was doing. Today she was wearing a suit, the one with the skirt he liked because it showed off her long legs. Her dark hair, which fell partway down her back, was pulled into a loose ponytail.

Before someone came along and teased him for openly staring at his soon-to-be wife, he stepped into the room. "I was just heading upstairs for a meeting in about ten minutes. Thought I'd see how it was going."

"Actually, your timing is perfect. I was hoping you could look at what I've done—I'm afraid I've forgotten something. I know we talked about what health plan I should get, and I'm pretty sure I did the tax forms correctly…I'm just a bit overwhelmed with forms at this point."

Matt's brow furrowed. While Sarah had recovered from the head injuries she had received earlier that fall, it disturbed him that she still had occasional bouts of forgetfulness when she was tired or stressed. With an effort, he pushed his concerns aside. _It's her first day here, Granger. She might forget this sort of thing anyway._ "Listen, this meeting won't last long. I think you need a break more than anything. I'll take a quick look at what you have so far, then I'll come back to get you and we'll go to lunch. I think Grace and Rene wanted to come, too." Grace Tanaka, one of his fellow agents, had befriended Sarah when the cartel had been stalking her. Rene Enriquez was Matt's partner, and he had also become a trusted friend of the Stetsons.

"Oh, that would be nice. She's pretty serious about wanting to partner with me. Grace wants me to do a ride along or two with her next week, after I've had a chance to look at the manual."

"I guess she's figuring light surveillance. You won't have your sidearm yet."

"Yes. I've got lunches scheduled through Thursday—Phillip and Jamie tried for Tuesday, but I said I was booked. Standing date."

He grinned. "Yep. Can't break our streak."

Sarah could not help grinning back at Matt. She always found him irresistible when his eyes were twinkling. With an effort, she forced herself to focus on the task at hand, pointing at the screen. "Here are the insurance forms."

Matt sat down next to her so he could read the screen more easily.

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Strolling slowly past the table, Sarah pointed at each of the various weapons, identifying them. On the other side of the wall nearby, one could hear the sound of muffled gunshots coming from the Agency's firing range.

From where he stood, leaning against the wall with his arms crossed, Leatherneck watched without comment until Sarah had finished. In his late sixties, the former Marine was still lean and fit, his graying hair cut short and his face clean-shaven. More wrinkles had formed on his face over the three decades since he first joined the Agency, but his relaxed demeanor and easy smile gave the casual observer the impression that they were from laughing, not frowning. Now he was mostly retired, but like Lee and Amanda Stetson, he came into the Agency for special assignments. When he had learned that his longtime friends' daughter had signed on as an analyst, he had personally requested the opportunity to train Sarah on some basic field techniques. This extra training was to give her the chance to be on equal footing with the rest of her freshman class.

"Not bad, Junior Ace. But you're going to have go faster than that. No hesitation. A good agent can identify a weapon in a heartbeat. Knows what he or she is up against. You may be taking the weapon off of someone's hands—you'll need to know how to use it if your own weapon is compromised or out of rounds. Many times you can also identify your assailant partially by the sidearm they are using. You may be in a firefight and need to take weapons from any bodies that are lying nearby. There is a whole list of scenarios…

"I get the picture."

As if he was remembering himself, Leatherneck's gaze softened. "Right. Just run through it again, no hesitation if you can. You've learned quickly here."

Brushing aside the compliment, Sarah explained, "I had already recognized a few of them."

They were interrupted as a young man, perhaps the same age or a year younger than Sarah, appeared in the doorway. He was average height, with a wiry build that gave Sarah the impression that he worked out regularly. His haircut was not very different from Matt's, making Sarah think he might be ex-military. He hesitated, waiting to get Leatherneck's attention. Noticing Sarah there with Leatherneck, the young man's eyes remained on her for a few seconds longer than seemed necessary.

Leatherneck finally glanced over at him. "Yes, Hill?"

"The quartermaster asked me to see if you needed any help."

"Nope, we're good. Thanks."

Hill nodded politely and went back out to the hallway.

"New recruit?"

"Yeah. Grant Hill. He was hired on as an intern. Wong hasn't quite decided if he wants him in the freshman class. They need people, but Hill is right out of school. Finished his Master's in Criminal Justice early. He's barely old enough to be hired. Twenty-three last month."

"I should remind you that I'm twenty-three for another couple of months. He looks like former military."

"Close. Civil Air Patrol. Did some time with the ROTC, but did not sign on with the Marines when he had the chance. Decided on intelligence instead. Why all the questions?"

"I figure I'll be working with him. He might end up in my class."

"He knows who you are; that's why he stared. You won't need to flash your ring at him."

"I'm not sure if that's good or bad." Sarah was still nervous about being the butt of rumors because of scare with the cartel earlier that fall.

"Probably good. Let's get back to what we were doing."

She walked past the table again, naming the make and model of each weapon.

Leatherneck walked to the table and picked up a submachine gun, quizzing Sarah about its use and the known countries and terrorist groups that typically carried that model. Removing the magazine, he showed it to Sarah. "Can you tell me what caliber cartridges these are?"

"Seven point six two millimeter?"

"Good. You can also say thirty caliber." He repeated the process with several other weapons, until he held a Glock 19 in his hands. He offered it to Sarah. "Okay, Junior, let's see if you can dismantle this one and put it back together. I'll demonstrate, then give you a try."

Sarah did not mind the boyish nickname Leatherneck had given her as a small girl. Her father was "Ace," so she had understood that "Junior Ace" was a term of affection. Leatherneck was always the gentleman with her and her mother, but her father was not overly fond of the moniker. In her mind, Sarah could hear her father admonishing their friend at the track after one her driving lessons during high school. "Look, Leatherneck. I'm keeping Sarah out of this business. I just want her to be able to handle a car well. Junior is no name for a girl."

Until recently, Lee had kept Sarah out of the business. Now Leatherneck was eagerly preparing Sarah for the new agent training class that was commencing in less than two months. And Lee was having to adjust to the idea that yet another Stetson had become an intelligence operative. As he had put it recently to her mother, "At least until her six months of field work are over and she can be safely in an office in Analysis." Sarah knew her parents were pleased she would be working with her brother Jamie. Jamie King, who treated Sarah as a full sister, was actually her half-brother. His father, Joe King, had died while Jamie was still a teenager.

While Jamie had avoided working at the Agency for a few years after college, Efraim Beaman had eventually recruited him to work in Analysis. A friend of the Stetson family and a longtime Agency employee, Efraim had not failed to notice Jamie's sharp mind and intellectual curiosity. During the last year, Efraim, whose wife Francine had become the section chief upon Lee's retirement, had stepped down from his leadership role in Analysis and let Jamie take over the reins, preferring to act as more of a consultant to the different departments that supported field operations.

Sarah stopped her train of thought when Leatherneck handed the gun to her. He watched as she tested the feel of the weapon in her hands, and then began to dismantle it.

"What do you think?"

"Before you ask, I already know it's a nine millimeter. It's smaller than the handguns my dad and Matt carry. And it fits in my hand like my mom's Smith and Wesson."

He didn't say anything as Sarah removed the clip, pulled back the slide, checked the chamber, and disassembled the gun, then reassembled it. A slow grin formed on his face as she completed the process and tested the weapon.

"That went well, Junior."

"Thanks." She glanced up at him, unsure why he was hesitating.

"That's the third generation of that model. I've been saving this little gem. It's reliable, and a favorite among a lot of law enforcement personnel. If you like the way it handles, it's yours—that is once you finish your training and are certified to carry on behalf of the Agency."

"Oh, it's thoughtful of you to offer it to me…" Turning it over in her hands, Sarah examined the handgun, an uncertain expression on her face.

"What is it? You don't like the way it feels?"

"No. I just never imagined carrying a gun. That was something my parents did, not me. And until recently, I just accepted that Matt carried weapons. He trained me to fight back, but the worst I've done is knock someone out. …Well, I knocked a guy silly last week."

"Do I need to teach Granger a thing or two?" Leatherneck was grinning.

"No. Some guy in a bar."

Leatherneck's grin faded. "You can tell me about that some time. I'm sure Granger was ticked. But what if it was a baddie, Sarah, and your partner's life was on the line?"

"Oh, I understand why I need to use the gun."

Leatherneck watched Sarah's face for a moment. "Tell you what. Let's just clean this little 19 and we'll meet at the firing range next door tomorrow. You can practice shooting. Get the feel of the gun some more. We'll work on how to handle recoil and that sort of thing. You can also try out a Smith and Wesson. I have one like your mom's in the armory."

After cleaning the sidearm, Sarah relaxed and looked up at Leatherneck again. "Okay." She put the Glock back on the table. "What next?"

Glancing first at his watch, Leatherneck grinned at her. "This is all I had planned for today, but it's still early. If you want, we could practice picking locks."

Soon Sarah, who had learned a few tips on lock picks from her brother Phillip when she was in high school, was getting a refresher course.

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"Oh, it's so good to see you, Sweetheart." Amanda relished greeting her daughter more than ever now, after almost losing her that autumn. With the last of the cartel members who had threatened to abduct Sarah either in custody or dead, the entire family was breathing a collective sigh of relief. Especially now that Sarah had fully recovered from the bad fall she had taken escaping from Brad Smith, the turned Agency operative who had joined forces with the cartel members. Amanda hugged Sarah tightly for a few more seconds before stepping back and allowing her husband to wrap his arms around their daughter as well.

"Hey, Pumpkin."

Amanda watched as Lee embraced their daughter, his eyes closed with some unnamed emotion. She imagined that he might be struggling with his memories of recent months, too, but she wondered at the depth of his feelings. While Lee was quite protective of his family, particularly the women in his life, he was also one to move on gratefully once a case was over. _But he doesn't seem to be shaking it this time._

Eager to lighten his mood, Amanda was enthusiastic. "So, how was your first day? Does Leatherneck have you ready to go to Station One?" As she finished speaking, she went into the kitchen and started pouring some tea for herself and her daughter.

"Well, I'd hardly say I was heading there, yet." In the den nearby, Sarah took an armchair, while Lee stretched out on the sofa, yawning as he did so. Still on London time, it was late at night for Lee and Amanda.

Sarah regarded her father. "Did you see the chicken and pasta we left for you? I'm sure you were starved when you got home this afternoon."

"We ate a little already. It was great." Lee patted his stomach. "You two really like to be domestic."

Sarah snorted. "I'd hardly call Matt domestic. But he keeps his apartment neat and he knows how to cook a decent meal."

"Listen, that first part is rather uncommon, Sweetheart. I should know. But at least your dad has always been an excellent cook." Amanda rolled her eyes at her husband as she handed a cup of tea to Sarah and sat down in the other armchair with her own cup. "So, what did you do?"

Lee wisely remained silent in response to his wife's friendly dig. There was no point in defending himself. His apartment had been in a state of hopeless disarray for years before Amanda had come along and finally tamed the chaos. "Yeah, tell us."

"Well, I spent an hour or two on paperwork. It was, uh, interesting doing the background information."

Lee was annoyed. "Amanda, why didn't they just give Sarah a pass on the family information? No one reads that stuff anyway. Someone has already done the legwork before these kids get hired. They just want to see if these new agents are honest."

"I don't want special privileges, Daddy. I need to keep the HR people on my side, too."

"Wise move, Sweetheart. Your father was used to sweet-talking the HR ladies back in the day. Or worse."

"A-mand-a!" Lee sat up, his eyes flashing. "Sarah doesn't need to know about that."

"Come on, Daddy. I heard all about you years ago from Francine."

"What the…" In an effort to keep calm, Lee cleared his throat. "What exactly did she tell you, and why am I just finding this out now?"

"She said you were a ladies' man, but you'd been cured for good when you fell in love with Mom." Sarah sipped her tea. "And she warned me not to listen to people who wanted to tell stories about you. It was at a Christmas party at the Beamans's. Some lady named Cindi figured out who I was and started to tell me some story about you. Francine did her little thing—she swooped in and told the lady to take off."

"Seems that everyone has met Cindi with an 'i' except me." Amanda feigned annoyance.

"Francine said Cindi was quite nice looking at one time, Daddy." Sarah winked at her mother.

The mention of Cindi, who had been the butt of more than one jealous remark from Amanda many years ago, made Lee nervous. Until he noticed the wink. Recognition dawned on his face. "Oh stop it, both of you. I'm surprised at you, Sarah."

"Oh come on, Lee. Sarah's just teasing you."

"I'm not a little girl anymore, Daddy. Francine did say that about you, but Mom told me about Cindi with an 'i.' I was just having some fun. You must know that I've heard stories about you."

Scowling, Lee laid back down on the couch, his arms crooked under his head, eyes on the ceiling. In an obvious effort to change the subject, he queried, "What else did you do?"

"Grace and Rene went to lunch with Matt and me. She's put a word in with Wong to have me partner with her. I guess I didn't scare her off."

"You're just as likeable as your mom." Lee smiled fondly over at her, then stared back at the ceiling once again, listening intently.

Sarah blushed at the compliment and glanced at her mom, who gave her an encouraging grin and offered, "Grace was one of my top freshman agents. You can learn a few things from her, I'm sure."

"I spent a few hours this afternoon with Leatherneck. We could have started our own militia with the weapons he had on that table."

"He called us after you left. God, I hate it when he calls you Junior." Lee grimaced. Sitting up again, he looked over at Sarah. "He said you covered the entire week's lesson in one afternoon."

Nonplussed, Sarah did not answer at first. "He just had me go over all the weapons with him. I've seen a lot of them before or heard you and Jamie and Phillip talking about them. He thought it would take a week?"

"Sarah, most people don't know quite that much about small arms." Amanda glanced over at Lee. "When do you go to the shooting range?"

"Tomorrow. Leatherneck has a Glock 19 he wants me to try out. He thinks it would be a good sidearm for me."

"I'll have to give him a call. I've heard mixed reviews about the new ones."

"It's a Generation Three, Daddy, not a Four. And it's in great condition."

Lee smirked. "I see. Those are very reliable. If you like it, you should take him up on the offer." He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. "You know, I never thought you were paying much attention when I tried to talk about guns with you."

"Now Daddy, I was listening. I guess I've gained a greater appreciation for them with all that's happened."

"Next Matt will be teaching you how to throw a knife."

"No." Sarah sat up straight, emphatic. "Do you know he killed a boar with one while we were in Texas?" She shuddered.

"Really? You didn't tell me about that." Lee was animated now. "How did he manage that? They have tough hides." His grin faded when he noticed that Sarah was disturbed at some memory. "I'll have to ask him about it."

"What is it, Sarah?" Amanda turned toward her daughter, concerned.

"There was a lot of blood. It triggered a flashback." Sarah stared at the floor, thinking. She glanced up at her father and over at her mother. "I remembered a little more of what happened at the park, but I'm still blank from the time when the guy was dragging me away to when Daddy and I were helping Matt."

Neither woman noticed the bleak expression on Lee's face when Amanda put her teacup and saucer down on the table and went to Sarah, her arms outstretched. "I'm so sorry." Somehow Amanda managed to perch on the edge of Sarah's chair as she enveloped her daughter in a hug.

"Thanks, Mom. I'm better. I was afraid to run through the brush on the property at first, but Matt knows where the boars roam. I felt kind of foolish for worrying about them after a few days."

"I was talking about the flashback."

"Oh, well. They'll go away eventually."

A knock sounded on the front door. Sarah glanced at the clock as she got up and moved to the foyer, talking as she went. "That's Matt. It's already past six o'clock. You probably want to get some sleep. Daddy was practically down for the count earlier."

Amanda turned to Lee as Sarah, now out of sight, opened the front door. He raised his eyebrows in return, but did not say anything out loud.

After Matt said his hellos and filled Lee in on his adventure with the boar, the young couple left Lee and Amanda so they could eat dinner in Sarah's apartment over the garage.

A little while later, Lee was brushing his teeth as Amanda turned down the bed and slipped on her nightgown. "Lee, do you think it's going to be a problem for Sarah with these flashbacks? What if she's out in the field and has one?"

Spitting, Lee rinsed his mouth before answering. "Kirby will have to clear her for field duty. She can't go out on anything more than routine surveillance until he's signed off on her. You know that." Placing his hands on either side of the sink, he leaned forward, staring down at the drain.

"But do you think she can get past them?"

"I noticed she remembered a little more. She still can't remember the part where I shot Santiago." Lee continued to prop himself up against the counter, but now his eyes were closed.

Amanda's voice was soft as she placed a hand on his back. "Lee, what is it?"

Straightening up, Lee sighed heavily. "It's nothing. I'm just tired."

"You didn't look tired just now. You were in pain."

"I don't have a backache, if that's what you mean."

"You know what I mean. What's upsetting you?"

Lee's expression was guarded now. "It's nothing, Amanda. I just need to spend some time with Kirby. I'm going in tomorrow."

"It must be bad if you are willing to go to Kirby, especially the day after we get back from London."

"Please. I'm having a hard time with all that happened to Sarah. I don't want to think about it right now. I just want to go to bed."

Putting her arms around her husband, Amanda hugged him for a moment, grateful when he returned the gesture. "If you want to talk with me about it, I'll be here."

"I know it." He smiled down at her. "Thanks, Amanda. I love you." He kissed her forehead and reached for the bathroom light switch.

"I love you, too, Scarecrow."


	2. Chapter 2

After settling himself on the bench, Matt took the offered sandwich from Sarah. The weather being unseasonably warm, they had opted to have their lunch date at the park near the Agency. With many of the trees' and shrubs' branches now bare for winter, they no longer had the privacy they had grown used to having on their favorite bench. But it was pleasant in the midday sun, so neither of them minded. And while neither would acknowledge it out loud, they both were aware of the scrutiny of other Agency personnel, some of whom might also be visiting the park on the unseasonably warm day. They sat quietly for a while, eating their lunch and enjoying one another's companionship.

Finally, Sarah broke the silence. "So, you seem busy this week. You were missed while you were on vacation?"

"I guess so. Rene was all too happy to share some of the grunt work with me. We're looking into some possible espionage activity on a college campus." At Sarah's raised eyebrows, he continued. "It's not at your alma mater. It may come to nothing. But we're running background checks and surveillance on some individuals. Can't really say anything more." Matt swallowed some water. "What about your morning? Now that you're a whiz with small arms, what has Leatherneck given you to do for today?"

"At some point he wants to take me out to the track and have me practice some maneuvers. I also worked on lock picking again—or rather, how to pick more locks than Phillip taught me to pick. I was in handcuffs today. But I couldn't get them open. I need to practice some more." Sarah lifted her sandwich to her mouth and took a bite, her sleeve slipping down momentarily to reveal a bruise.

"Wait. Let me see your wrist again." Matt's brow furrowed as he tried to catch a glimpse of the skin that was hidden by her sleeve when she placed the sandwich back in her lap. Setting down his own sandwich on the wrapper next to him on the bench, he took her hand and pushed up her sleeve.

"Oh now. It's just a little red mark. I was trying to pick the lock on the handcuffs. Leatherneck already chastised me for not practicing on them first."

Releasing her hand, he resumed eating his sandwich. "Well, you are enthusiastic. Just don't go getting covered with bruises. Someone might get after me."

Despite the light banter, Sarah could see Matt was somewhat serious about the bruises. A smile flitted across her face briefly at his protective behavior. "Like I said, Leatherneck gave me a lecture."

"When do you get to try out the Glock?"

"I already did."

"Oh! Really? How did that go?" The bruise forgotten, Matt was animated now.

"I was kind of nervous, but we just used some simple targets. It seems like a good weapon. I also tried a Smith and Wesson."

"What did you think?"

"I like the Glock better. It fits in my hand okay, so the size is fine. I liked how easy it was to use. And my aim is better. I just have to be careful of the recoil."

"A lot of enthusiasts swear by that model. That generation of it was very reliable."

"And this one is in pristine condition. When I cleaned it, it looked like it had hardly been used." A memory flitted across the recesses of Sarah's consciousness. She tried to grasp it, but it was gone.

"A penny for your thoughts. You seemed a million miles away for a moment there."

"Something about all this talk about the gun brought some memory to my mind. But it was gone just as quickly as it came."

Matt had an idea that the memory might have something to do with the missing parts of Sarah's recollection of their attack in the park, but Dr. Kirby had urged that Sarah be allowed to remember things on her own, without any prompting. Matt thought wryly that his request was more for the benefit of the attorneys than for Sarah herself.

Realizing that Sarah was speaking again, Matt focused on her.

"…was saying that I take to guns better than my mom did. He said he was worried I'd not want to fire one."

"Maybe you take after your dad."

"But I'm no expert, like my dad. He has a reputation for his aim with a handgun."

Matt had read the report of Lee's latest work with a handgun. While Matt and Sarah had knocked two of their assailants unconscious at the beginning of their attack, Matt had been severely wounded in a knife fight with Piedro Gomez, whom Matt eventually killed. Lee had stopped Luis Santiago, the Mexican cartel member who was trying to drag Sarah away, with a bullet to the center of his forehead. Matt pushed the thought from his mind.

"So, how was your aim? Ready to take on the simulations?"

"You sound like my mom. She was teasing me about going to Station One already."

"Seriously, you will be more than prepared after Leatherneck finishes with you."

"My mom confided in me that she had a rough time there. But she thinks I'll be fine. I'm not so sure. I know she's seen a lot of people through it, but she's probably biased about me."

"I agree with your mom. I think you'll do just fine. You've already mastered some of the things that are covered there." He gathered up all their trash and took it to the waste receptacle nearby, then perched on the edge of the bench. "I should tell you. Wong has asked me to handle the hand-to-hand training for your class. He's already processing the paperwork so I'll be official. I'll be teaching self-defense and offensive techniques."

"Just as long as you don't pick on me too much."

"We'll see about that." Matt winked at her, and then gave her a kiss on the lips before adding suggestively, "We can demonstrate our techniques."

"Very funny, Agent Granger. Let's get back to work."

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Waiting for Leatherneck to finish some paperwork and make a few phone calls, Sarah was practicing her aim in the firing range on Thursday of that week. As she emptied the last cartridge from the magazine of the Glock, she noticed a movement out of the corner of her eye. Pulling off her protective glasses, she was surprised to see her father watching her on the other side of the window. She walked out to talk with him, removing her headset once she was outside the range.

"Nice work, Sarah. At this rate, Leatherneck will start giving you 'live' targets."

"Daddy! I didn't expect to see you here." She did not miss the fleeting expression of discomfort on his face at her words.

"Oh, well. I had a meeting. I thought I'd look in here and see what hoops Leatherneck was making you jump through today."

"We're heading out to the track soon."

"Don't forget you have to meet your mom at the mall. I've been informed I'm baching it tonight."

Rolling her eyes, Sarah was unsympathetic. "Oh, Daddy. We both know that means heating up leftovers. You'll probably sit in front of some spy thriller and enjoy yourself."

Chuckling, Lee changed the subject. He reached for the handgun. "Let's take a look at the Glock." Working deftly from his years of experience with weapons, Lee had the sidearm dismantled and was examining its inner workings before Sarah had a chance to finish checking the results of her target practice. When she came back out of the shooting range with her targets, Lee was eager to talk about her gun.

"Looks like it's in great shape. You should get years of use out of this piece." He glanced over at Sarah. "That Gyrene really does have a soft spot for you. Even if he does call you Junior."

"Junior's her name, in my book. And thanks for the compliment. My dad was a Gyrene—one of those who never gave up in the field. I'm just an old Marine." Leatherneck offered Lee a slow, teasing grin.

Lee grinned back at his old friend. "If the shoe fits… Thanks for giving Sarah a nice piece."

Although Lee knew Leatherneck's real name—Allen O'Brien—it was through tacit agreement that no one at the Agency used it. And it was not just because of O'Brien's fondness for nicknames. Leatherneck, who like his father was Marine veteran, had seen service in Vietnam. Rumor had it that after leaving the Marines, he stayed in Southeast Asia to work as an operative for the Central Intelligence Agency. He had married while he was there, but one of his cases nearly cost him his life, blowing O'Brien's cover and causing the end of his marriage. Leatherneck was all too happy to put his past behind him when he started at the Agency. In all the years he had known him, Lee had never gotten Leatherneck to give any further details about his personal history.

Now looking at Sarah's results, Leatherneck motioned for Lee to come over. "Take a look at these, Ace. I know the missus became a decent shot over time, but Junior here does not seem to be following in her footsteps—her results are impressive."

Lee remained where he was, not sure whether he was astounded or riled. "Geez, Leatherneck. If that wasn't a backhanded compliment to my wife…"

"Now you know I think the world of Mrs. S. But she did not take to guns quickly."

Only somewhat mollified, Lee frowned at Leatherneck, then looked at Sarah quickly. As close as Leatherneck was to his family, Lee never tolerated remarks from anyone that remotely belittled a family member, especially his wife. Especially in front of his daughter.

Still backpedalling, Leatherneck tried to cover his faux pas by explaining himself to Sarah. "Your mom didn't like guns. She did fine once she got used to them."

Now it was Sarah's turn to roll her eyes. "Mom is the first person to admit she hated guns and was a lousy shot when she started here." She glanced at her phone. "Look, I only have a couple of hours before I have to meet her. We'd better go."

Leatherneck reached for the Glock, which Lee had already reassembled. "Before we go, your dad should look at your results."

While Leatherneck locked up the sidearm, Lee stepped over to see the targets. He let out a low whistle. "Even better than I thought." A proud grin spread over his face as he placed a hand on his daughter's shoulder. "Well done, Pumpkin."

"I guess I learned a few things from you, huh, Daddy?"

"Yes. You were paying attention. I shouldn't have been so hard on a teenage girl."

Sarah searched her father's face. "You were never hard on me. And I wasn't too young to learn how to use a gun. Just too young to appreciate it."

Leatherneck appeared in the doorway, his jacket in hand. "Ready, Junior?"

The threesome walked to the parking garage together.

"So what's next for Sarah, Leatherneck?"

"Simulations. We'll start with the video simulations. Time to see how Junior does when they're moving."

By simulations, Lee and Sarah knew that Leatherneck was talking about video game-type exercises. The guns used in this simulation were not real, but felt like real weapons. The computer controlled the speed of the images' movements until they mimicked the actions of subjects, eventually preparing the freshman agent for advanced simulations and obstacle courses, which represented real life field scenarios. The agents running the simulations and obstacle course would be forced to make almost instantaneous decisions on whether a subject was friend or foe, threat or harmless, then fire their weapon, this time an actual sidearm, when appropriate.

Lee waited for Leatherneck to get in his car, and then stopped Sarah with a hand on her arm. "Hey, Sarah. Dr. Kirby said he cleared you for field duty. Said you were okay for light operations."

Brow furrowing, Sarah responded slowly. "Yes. Do you think it's a problem? I have to go in the field sometime. Until I'm trained, it couldn't be anything very dangerous."

"No, of course not. I was just a little surprised, since you'd had the flashback."

"But I was fully aware of my surroundings."

"Well, I guess Kirby knows best." Lee gave Sarah a quick hug and a kiss on the forehead. "Just take it easy on the track. The weather is great, at least."

"I'll be fine, Daddy. Love you." Sarah unlocked her car and got in.

"Love you, too, Pumpkin. Have fun with your mom tonight. Don't spend too much of my money, okay?" He gave her a dimpled grin before closing her car door.

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Amanda was sipping a cup of tea and reading a magazine when Lee arrived home. Walking over to the couch, he bent over to give her a kiss before sitting down beside her.

"How was it? You look cheerful."

"Sarah's a whiz with that Glock. You should have seen her." Lee's expression held a faraway look as he remembered watching her at target practice. "Her score was better than some veteran agents' scores."

"I'm sure it's nice that your progeny takes after you."

Lee did not miss her sarcastic tone. He put an arm around her shoulders. "Oh, now. I wasn't talking about you. Once you got used to holding a handgun, your aim was quite good."

"Sure, Stetson. We both know I'm not a crackshot. But I am glad Sarah takes after you. It's a different world out there. She needs to be able to defend herself and her fellow agents—and possibly civilians." Amanda turned to face Lee. "But I was asking about your session with Kirby."

His demeanor noticeably changed, Lee was noncommittal. "Oh, it was fine. I go back next week."

Brow furrowed, Amanda did not let the comment go. "Fine? What did he say?"

"Look, we didn't get anywhere. I told him what the problem was, and he asked a lot of questions. I think he's trying to figure out what to do with me. Gave me the same old line that I was just doing what I'd been trained to do."

"He's right."

Lee sighed, running a hand through his hair. "I let being an operative come first. I should have been a father first," he muttered in an exasperated tone. "You know, he cleared Sarah for field duty. Light operations."

"The man knows what he's doing, Lee."

He sighed again. "I know. It just seems like a risk, since she had the flashback recently. But she told him she was aware of her surroundings the entire time."

"He can't keep her out of the field unless there is good cause."

"No."

Amanda only raised her eyebrows as she queried him on another subject. "So, did you see Francine?"

"Yeah, I dropped by her office. She is tied up on that case that Matt is assigned to. Sounds like a UVa professor is not who she says she is. Matt and Rene are posing as grad students."

"I'm surprised Sarah didn't mention it."

"He can't tell her the details. The only reason I know and can tell you is that we still have high enough clearance." Lee got up. "I'm going to check my emails. I'll come out and read with you when I'm done."

"Sure. I don't have to leave for an hour and a half." Glancing up at his retreating back, Amanda smiled to herself. Since they had retired, Lee seemed content to spend more and more time relaxing companionably with her. The regular consulting appointments or ventures to the Agency, like today's, seemed to take the edge off the restlessness that would have been consuming her husband in his younger days.

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"Well, this has been a profitable trip, I'd say. We got a great deal on those bridesmaid dresses, and we picked up a few Christmas presents at the same time." Amanda glanced around the busy Italian restaurant, thinking they had been wise to eat early. The establishment was now full and a crowd of people waited in front. As much as she did not enjoy large crowds, she was glad for the cover that the noise made. She and Sarah could speak rather privately as they sat at their small table. She took a bite of pasta and looked at her daughter.

"It was really sweet of Jennifer and Amy to suggest that I ask Lauren and Emma to be bridesmaids." Sarah sliced into her chicken.

"Yes. I know you wanted to ask Jennifer and Amy, but they've been in their share of weddings and they want to help Cheryl. Besides, they're hosting that shower for you in a couple of weeks."

"I suppose they'll enjoy wearing something they picked out for themselves, too—and not having to march down the aisle."

"Now, Sarah. You picked out very tasteful dresses. And it will be nice to have a small party. The church is cozy."

"I hope Phillip and Jamie won't mind that Matt asked his friends from home."

"I think they want to be with Jennifer and Amy on the sidelines. It's fine, Sarah." Amanda took another bite of her pasta. "Tell me about Texas."

"My fiancé is a romantic. I never really told you about the Riverwalk. We had such a good time. He knows I love all the historical stuff. But he enjoys it, too. We went on a boat tour after we visited the Alamo." Sarah took another bite of chicken.

"Oh, how nice! Your father told me a little about the Alamo and the Mexican food. We don't need to talk about your drive afterwards." Smiling ruefully, Amanda leaned towards her daughter. "How did things turn out with David, really? You were rather vague on the phone."

"Well, you know that David had his reservations about us marrying so quickly. He and Matt butted heads a few times." Sarah blushed and took a sip of her iced tea. "He thought I might be pregnant and Matt was just trying to do the right thing."

"Oh, Sweetheart." Amanda reached out to put her hand on Sarah's. "But you worked it all out."

"We were doing pretty well until he thought he overheard me two-timing Matt. Or whatever he thought."

"What? You didn't tell me. He seems like such a nice man."

"He's just protective of his family. Like Daddy."

"Why did he think you weren't being faithful to Matt?"

"He overheard me talking with the guys from the San Antonio office. That was incredibly awkward in so many ways."

"You told me about that. That's why you told David and Sharon you're…" Amanda looked around and seeing the woman at the next table glance over, did not finish her sentence.

"Mom, we made him suspicious. We weren't being truthful. He has that 'parent radar.' He just couldn't figure out what wasn't truthful. He overheard us talking about me not being able to work with Matt as a team, running off, and having admirers—he turned it all around."

"You must have been hurt."

"I was. And I was worried that I was coming between Matt and his dad. I was so worked up I even said I could not be the person that came between them. Matt did not take that well. Of course he thought I was going to break things off."

"Oh, Sarah. That would devastate him. And you. Why suggest it?"

"I felt so awful. It was the final straw. I kept feeling as if I was the reason they weren't getting along."

"But Sarah, you just can't say things like that to a man. They are far more sensitive than we give them credit for. Their self-worth is connected to how we see them."

"I didn't say I didn't respect or admire him."

Amanda took a sip of iced tea and watched as Sarah played with her food. "Sarah, even strong men need constant affirmation from their women. It can affect their ability to do their job. I've seen your dad affected that way."

"I could see him panicking when I said it. I felt terrible. I guess I won't be that thoughtless again."

"You meant to be selfless."

"I guess so. I don't like conflict at all." Sarah swiped a tear from her cheek.

"Well, it appears that you and Matt got things resolved. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you cry, Sweetheart." Amanda passed Sarah a tissue. Sitting back in her chair, she grew thoughtful. "Matt was operating as a loner before he met you. How quickly men in this line of work can change when they meet the right person."

"I guess you're right. You know, I met some of Matt's old friends. One of the girls had quite a thing for him in high school. Still does."

Amanda's forehead wrinkled as she swallowed a sip of iced tea. "How did that go?"

"Well, um, Matt and I had a misunderstanding. But we worked it out." A grin flickered across Sarah's face.

"As in, you had a tiff and you had a nice time making up." Amanda pursed her lips, but could not hide her amusement.

"Yes." Sarah's expression faltered. "It was a little rough though—it was more than a tiff. I can see now why Matt was a bit of a loner—why he's been cautious around girls. He has his reasons. I guess I don't think about him being by himself because we've been friends since the time we met."

"Even Rene had trouble drawing him out."

"Well, it makes sense now. He's sociable with my friends, but he just hasn't opened up with them the way he has with Rene or Philip and Jamie. We went out for pizza last night with the dance class people and he was still reserved, even after all of these months."

"Just give him time. Your father was very reserved around your grandmother and the boys for a long while. I guess it also comes with being in the... Well, you know."

"He's told me that he's really glad I can be his confidante. I wonder how he came to trust me so quickly."

"Probably because of your dad and me. You're safe, in his eyes. You must know that by now. He and I hit it off right away, too." Amanda finished her iced tea. "If you really want to know, I think he missed his mom and I was a helpful substitute—someone who understood what he really did for a living. Then you came along—his soul mate, to use your grandmother's term—and he found what he really needed. As you said, a confidante. Someone he could love and trust."

"Aww, Mom. It's nice of you to put it that way."

"It's true."

"And it makes sense." She drank the last of the water in her glass and glanced at her phone to check the time. "I guess we had better get going. Thanks for the talk and advice, Mom."

"You're welcome. I love you, Sarah." She reached over and patted Sarah's hand again.

"I love you, too, Mom."

"Do you want a doggie bag? I need to go to two more stores on our way out." She waved to the server.

"Aren't you tired from jetlag?"

"Oh, not too bad. I slept in this morning. Besides, you know how I hate to put off Christmas shopping."

"I feel the same way. There's enough to do for this wedding. I want to enjoy it. Thankfully I'm almost done with my shopping. I just need something for Matt. I want it to be special, but he said not to spend much money."

"Good idea. Christmas isn't just about the gifts. Besides, getting married is a nice gift by itself." Amanda signed the receipt and soon they were headed through the mall.

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"Junior, I have this thing on the easy setting. You should be able to get all of those targets."

With a sigh of resignation, Sarah raised the "gun" and aimed at each target. Hitting each of the "assailants," she effectively ended the simulation.

"Your accuracy there was perfect, but you failed the overall simulation."

"I know. I'm not into video games. This seems too real."

"Which is making you hesitate. They're killing you before you can aim your weapon."

"Maybe I need to keep working on my target shooting. I'm still only at eighty."

"Which is a passing score. We can bring that up before your training starts. We need to help you stop hesitating. One more time through before we call it a day."

Sarah sighed again. Reluctantly, she prepared herself for the next simulation.

Watching her, Leatherneck decided to hold off for a moment. "You need to think of the targets in this simulation as enemies. Because they are your enemies. How do you think Granger manages to do it?"

"Oh, I don't want to think about that."

Speaking gently, Leatherneck persisted. "No. Of course not. But he is a damn fine soldier. That's why he works here. How does he do it?"

Remembering the wild boar, Sarah replied, "He does what he needs to do. He doesn't think twice. He just reacts. He killed a wild boar that way. He took out the cartel men…" Her voice died off.

Eager to keep her mind from dwelling on disturbing memories from the park, Leatherneck continued. "How did you manage to take out the guy in the bar? Or any other time?"

"I just used the techniques Daddy and Matt taught me. I recognized a situation that was getting out of control or dangerous and I did what needed to be done. I got an earful when I knifehanded the guy who had a gun on Matt. I was not armed and I had no idea who I was up against."

Leatherneck chuckled. "An agent doesn't always know who they're up against. Your dad just didn't want you using the techniques unnecessarily when Matt, who was more highly trained, could have taken the guy out himself. But you saved Matt's hide. No wonder he chased after you."

Sarah frowned. "That wasn't it. He didn't chase after me. Let's do the simulation."

Leatherneck merely raised his eyebrows as he turned back to the computer.

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After lunch Sarah found Jamie busy in his office. She waited in the doorway until he glanced up at her.

"Hey, Sarah. I'm sorry I missed our lunch date again."

"It's probably the same case that has everyone missing lunch."

Jamie smirked at her. "I think you're right." He regarded her for a moment. "Come on in and sit down. Now that the rush is over, I'm just doing some internet research. It's not classified at the moment, so you can take a look-see at what I'm doing. You'll be helping me out here soon."

"Francine wants me to help you next week. She says she's expedited my first security clearance so I can do a little research. I guess you folks need help." She sat down in a swivel chair near Jamie.

"You can say that. We're searching the internet based on certain key words. I can give you more details about where the sites are likely to be located and what we're looking for once Francine gives the all-clear."

"Matt and Rene have been spending a lot of time in the field."

Jamie glanced at her. "Yes. And you've been spending a lot of time learning about small arms, from what I hear. How's that going?"

"Okay." Sarah sighed and looked at his computer screen. "Hey, I did some research on this for my Master's. That's a great search engine, but for that topic, you might also want to try…"

"—just okay?" Jamie would not be deterred.

Sarah was quiet a moment. "It's a drag. I don't like simulations."

"Lee said you're going to be a crackshot."

She laughed softly. "He'd like to think so."

"From what I hear, he's right. Why the trouble with the simulations?"

Now Sarah stared at her brother. _Is he really going to make me say it?_ "I don't like shooting at the people. They look too real. It isn't the simulation itself. It's just that it reminds me of…things."

Jamie turned to face her, and reached over to turn her chair to face his. "No one in their right mind likes to shoot people, Sarah. But in this world it's necessary to have operatives, and it's necessary that they be trained to defend themselves and the agents and civilians around them."

"You're right. I know that. Leatherneck even reminded me that I haven't hesitated to use the knifehand on people when necessary."

Jamie smiled grimly. At the young age of twenty-three, Sarah had had more "field experience" with assailants than he had had in his twelve years with the Agency.

"In fact, after he said that, I stopped failing the simulations. I got a passing score on the next two. It's just hard to get used to the idea of using a gun."

He brightened and attempted to encourage her. "Hey. A passing score is all you need. If it makes you feel any better, I felt the same way about guns. But you know, I never fired my sidearm when I worked in the field. I brandished it at suspects a couple of times, but that was it."

He reached over and patted her arm. "Listen, I could use some help here. If you have an hour or so, I'll mark it down in your file so you can get credit from Wong."

Checking her watch, Sarah saw that it was still early. "I have more time than that."

"I hear your fiancé may be heading home in an hour. He's being debriefed right now." Jamie smiled slyly at her.

Sarah grinned back at him. "Then I guess I'd better not stay too long." She turned her chair back to the computer and took the keyboard from her brother.

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On Thursday of the following week, Sarah was practicing her lock picking when Lee came into the armory. "Hey, Daddy. You here for another meeting?"

"Yeah. You're mom asked me to remind you that you and Matt are supposed to come over for dinner tonight. She's making meatloaf."

Sarah grinned at her father knowingly. "She really likes to pamper Matt—that's his favorite. You didn't see him?"

"I cruised by the bullpen, but no one was there. Even Phillip was out. Jamie was pretty distracted. I guess he stood you up for lunch again? He said to apologize. Guess it was the second time in the past two weeks?"

Distractedly, Sarah mumbled, "That's okay. He already did apologize." Picking up her phone, she checked for texts. "Oh, Matt texted me while I was meeting with Leatherneck. I guess he's out in the field all afternoon."

"How did surveillance with Tanaka go this morning?"

"Just as boring as everyone said it would be. Except it wasn't boring for me." She grinned at her father. "All we did was sit in a car and take photos every so often. Grace told me that nothing came of it. But still, it was interesting."

Lee could not help but grin back at her. "Yeah. I remember the excitement of going into the field for the first time. It was not even important enough to be called a milk run, but I was still excited." He stepped over to watch her work with the handcuffs.

"Hey, Stetson. You interfering with my trainee?"

Lee pretended to be irritated. "Oh, let up, old man. She's doing just fine on her own," he growled.

Leatherneck chuckled. "Sarah, why don't you pack it up and go home? You've done enough for today."

"Thanks." Sarah gathered up the contents of the training kit, returning it to the quartermaster's office. She came back with her purse and coat. "Ready, Daddy?"

"Later, Ace. See you tomorrow, Junior."

Lee rolled his eyes again at the nickname as he placed his hand on Sarah's back and guided her out of the armory.


	3. Chapter 3

By the Christmas tree in the living room, Amanda handed Sarah a box of ornaments. "Thank you, Sweetheart, for taking the time to help me."

"Hey, it's just as much fun for me. And I don't need to haul out Grandma's tree. I'll be over here often enough."

Amanda smiled at her daughter. "We'd love that. I'll be right back with some hot chocolate."

In the kitchen, Amanda found Lee leaning against the counter, nursing a cup of coffee. The weather had grown colder overnight as a rainstorm had moved in, and his hands were still chilled.

She began heating the milk for the hot chocolate before she queried, "How did it go with Kirby?"

Lee spoke softly, still uncomfortable with his daughter knowing the true nature of his meetings at the Agency. "Oh, the same as every other time. He is playing down my concerns. I just don't get it. In the old days, I was always being accused of not being concerned enough. Now no one takes me seriously."

Amanda was quiet as she embraced her husband. "Maybe if you didn't dwell on it so much."

"Yeah. I thought of that. Kirby even pointed out that there is no point in trying to change the past. At least we agreed on something, even if it took four sessions with him."

An hour or two later, Sarah and Amanda were adjusting the ribbons on the tree when Sarah's phone rang.

"Hi, Matt." She could not help grinning. Because of Matt's case, they had not spent any time alone since their lunch on Tuesday, and even that had been rushed—Sarah had brought sandwiches to the Agency and they had eaten together in a conference room.

"Hi, Sweetie. I'm sorry I'm running late. We had an op this afternoon and it went longer than expected."

"Your case all wrapped up?"

"No. Just more complicated. But I'm already in the car. I'll be there in twenty minutes."

"No rush. The meatloaf isn't done yet. Drive carefully."

"Oh good. My favorite. Love you."

"Love you, too."

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Sarah was with her father in his study, watching a news report on the internet when her mother appeared in the doorway. "Didn't you hear the door, Sarah? Matt's here. Dinner will be ready in five minutes."

Rushing out to the foyer, Sarah expected to find Matt in the den, keeping her mother company. Instead, she spotted him out of the corner of her eye, standing by the tree in the darkened living room. Rather than wearing his usual suit, he was dressed in a sweater and jeans. Approaching him from behind, she slipped her arms about his waist and greeted her fiancé. "Hi."

"Hi."

Sarah felt Matt lean against her as he placed a cool hand on her wrist. He sighed quietly.

She rested her head against his back. "Long day?"

"Yeah. Rene and I had to go undercover again with backup. It always makes me tense when I have to be someone I'm not. At least in Afghanistan I could have long hair and a beard. It helps when you can hide under all that."

"Well, I'm glad you're here, now."

Matt turned around in her arms and wrapped his own around her. Without any preamble, he brought his lips to hers. The kiss was far more intense than their usual greeting; Sarah was surprised that he would kiss her like that when her parents might walk in at any moment.

When they finally broke apart, Sarah searched his eyes, which were barely illuminated in the soft glow of the tree. He seemed almost needy.

As if he were uncomfortable under her gaze, he looked over at the tree. "Did you help your mom with the tree?"

"Yes. We took our time, had some hot chocolate, made dinner together."

Matt's mood seemed to brighten a little as he glanced down at her. "Sounds nice." His eyes went back to the tree. "You know, I don't think I've been home for Christmas since I graduated from college. I was stationed overseas until last February—and that was only because of my early discharge so I could train with the Agency. I came home a couple of times, but not at Christmas. But you know all of that."

"Do you miss your family?"

"A little, I guess. I usually miss them more on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. I miss the tree, and watching everyone open gifts, and the treats my mom and grandmother make."

Sarah gave him a squeeze. "I'm sorry."

He sighed heavily, then stood a little straighter. "Don't be. You know, I've never told anyone that. Not even my mom. And this Christmas I'll have you. It can't get any better than that." He smiled down at her, then kissed her again. It was not as intense this time.

As Sarah leaned her head on Matt's chest, he rested his cheek against her hair. She made an effort to be cheerful. "Well, this can be like a second home. And next year we'll have our own home together."

"Only four more weeks." He reached up to caress her cheek. "Time seems to be flying by since we got back from Texas."

"You've been pretty busy with this case."

"I know." He touched his lips to her forehead. "It's so nice to be with you, holding you. And we have a little reprieve over the weekend. I have to be in the field again for a few hours tomorrow, but I'll be free."

"And no wedding registries to work on, no DJs to research…"

"Please, let's just do something relaxing. I know we need to pack. Then there's Christina's party."

"Maybe we could go for a run at Rock Creek Park. The rain is supposed to let up by then. And it will be warmer again."

Matt did not hesitate. "I'd love that."

"And we could leave the party early and go to a movie. Just you and me."

"That's a great idea." He pulled Sarah closer. "Maybe we could go up to your apartment for a little while after dinner."

"That would be nice." She rested her head against him.

As Matt spoke, Sarah could hear his deep voice rumbling in his chest. "This tree is so homey. Grandma Flo loves handmade ornaments, too." Still holding Sarah with one arm, he reached over and fingered one of the crafted ornaments—a wreath surrounding a photo. "I love this one of you when you were little. You've always been so beautiful."

"That's really sweet to say, Matt. I guess you've forgotten about some of my other photos. I was in kindergarten when that photo was taken—our teacher helped us make the ornaments."

"I think my mom has a couple of me like that. And I've looked at your photo albums more than once. You looked cute in braces." He laughed softly, causing his chest to rumble again in her ear.

Deciding it was time to change the subject, Sarah ventured, "We used to have real trees. But they're so expensive, and Grandma liked having the tree already on hand when she was ready to decorate—it was easier than trying to get Mom or Dad or one of my brothers to go with her to the lot."

"We always had an artificial tree. I like real trees, too, but I think my sisters are allergic to them. Honestly, once the lights are on the tree, they all look nice."

Amanda's voice called from the kitchen. "Come to the table, everyone. We're eating in the kitchen tonight."

"Be sure to tell my mom you like the tree." As Sarah walked with him into the kitchen, she was struck with inspiration. As long as her parents agreed, she no longer had to worry about the perfect Christmas gift for Matt.

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Sarah waited until Matt had driven away later that night before she texted her mother. It did not take long for her phone to ring.

She picked up the shoes she had left drying by her apartment door and put them away in her closet. "Hi, Mom. Thanks for calling so soon." She continued to straighten up as they talked, arranging pillows on the couch and hanging up the raincoat that was now dry.

"We were still up. Matt left early." Sarah thought she heard her mother putting dishes away while they talked.

"Yes. He was pretty tired. He has another op in the morning, too." Sarah smiled to herself. Although Matt had not stayed very long, they had still managed to enjoy the time alone. And if all went as planned, they would have plenty of time together doing something special the following evening.

"Francine is keeping them busy. So, what's up?"

"I figured out what I want to give Matt, and I need your help."

"Oh? What is it?"

"Well, I was wondering. Did you have plans for Grandma's tree? It's almost new. Were you planning to use it yourselves at some point?"

"Well, you know I like a larger tree and the one we have is good for a few more years. Hers was not very big. Why?"

"Well, Matt was telling me that he had not been home for Christmas in years."

"What a shame. Maybe you two could go next year. We'd miss you here, but he needs to be with his family, too."

"That's a nice idea, Mom." Sarah was not to be sidetracked. She continued with her proposal. "So I got to thinking. He has no decorations in his apartment, really. Just a string of lights on his balcony railing and a couple of things on his coffee table. I think they were gifts from ladies at church."

"Does Matt not have a tree?"

"No. But that isn't unusual for the single guys I know. I just thought Matt might enjoy having one."

"Maybe he'd like a real tree, Sarah."

"I think he'd be okay with an artificial one. His family had one."

"Did you do a little soft interrogation on your fiancé, my daughter?" Amanda pretended to chide Sarah.

"It was only in his best interests. He had no clue." Sarah giggled.

"So, you're thinking of giving him a Christmas tree. That's very sweet. Are you going to buy the decorations? I have some ornaments that belong to you…"

"Oh, let's keep those on your tree one more year. This will be Matt's tree for now. Is it okay?"

"Of course, Sweetheart. I would have given it to you for your own apartment, if you'd wanted. Your grandmother would be happy." Amanda grew quiet.

"Thanks, Mom. I love you."

"I love you, too, Sarah. And oh, I saw some nice ornaments on sale at that store in the mall."

"Great. Maybe Daddy can help me pack the tree into the car tomorrow. I'll get the ornaments on my way home. I just have a simulation with Leatherneck in the morning. I'm supposed to go to Matt's in the afternoon once he's home."

"Just come on over when you're ready. I'm sure your father would be glad to help you. It should just fit in the backseat. The box is not too big."

"Thanks, Mom. I really do appreciate this."

"It's my pleasure. Good night, Sweetheart."

"Night, Mom."

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Checking the magazine of her Glock, Sarah made sure she had fifteen rounds. She had two extra magazines in her pocket. Forty-five cartridges in all. She hoped she would only need a portion of them. Pulling back the slide on her sidearm, she was ready to fire. If only it was time to start. Leatherneck and Grant Hill were still setting the pop-ups.

Each sheet metal pop-up was in the general shape of a human. Cardboard images could be affixed to the pop-up to create a scenario of different individuals, from fellow agents to homeless people to civilians to potential assailants. The arena itself had a floor that sloped in one area, creating the effect of a hill, as well as "buildings," wooden crates, shrubs and other objects that might be found in a field situation. Each scenario had a different objective. Sometimes the agents were to provide cover for arresting agents. Other times they were to shoot a particular subject who could not otherwise be subdued. Agents training in the arena used real bullets, so the walls were reinforced, hollow point cartridges were used, and only the agent undergoing the simulation could be in the arena during an exercise. "Rounds" coming from shooters or fellow agents were really just charges that were set strategically throughout the arena. With the press of a button, Leatherneck could set them off, making it seem like gunfire.

Sarah had not told Matt about the arena. Intending to talk about it once they were alone in her apartment, she had quickly forgotten when Matt had sat down on the couch and pulled her onto his lap. It had seemed more important to talk about his day at that moment. Of course they had not talked for long… _Thank God it's only four more weeks—and Matt had the self-control to leave when he did._ It was getting harder and harder to wait.

Shaking her head so she would not be distracted by thoughts of their brief time alone together the night before, Sarah stood ready. This portion of the simulation was not just meant to make the agents unnecessarily nervous. It was meant to be similar to a real field situation, where danger might be waiting. Leatherneck had told Sarah to think of herself as being assigned to surveillance.

"Okay, Sarah, you're on. You've got a shooter to your left. You're the lead agent, but you may get turned around. Be ready for friendlies and civilians."

A shot rang out. It reverberated loudly despite the high tech noise-cancelling headset Sarah wore. Turning quickly, she spotted a weapon in the window to her upper left. She could not see anything else, so she worked her way to a higher spot on the right, hoping to take the shooter out—her goal for this exercise. As she dodged behind some packing crates, another shot rang out, this time just ahead of her to the right. She aimed at the assailant, an enemy gunman, and fired.

"Good Sarah. That's one down."

As she continued to work her way to the right, more fire erupted behind her. Schooled to ignore it, as she knew it would be "fellow agents," she focused on the area just around her. Suddenly an old homeless woman was there, her expression frightened. Sarah examined the pop-up quickly, and then fired. She was surprised when a shell bounced off of her shoulder. Her stance had been off, so her gun had been closer to her body than she thought.

"Excellent. You spotted the shotgun under her coat."

More gunfire erupted from the shooter's position. Sarah did not have time to dwell on the disturbing feeling she had from her split-second decision to possibly end the older woman's life. Leatherneck had just affirmed she was the enemy. And she had seen the shotgun.

More pop-ups erupted, all around her, and without taking the time to assess whether they were friendly, she dived behind a wall for protection. Unable to see the shooter's window now, she had become turned around. She crouched, waiting for something to help her get her sense of direction once again. Peeking around the edge of the wall to see the pop-ups, she was met with the sound of gunshots. Apparently they weren't friendly.

Now her adrenaline was pumping. Another shot rang out nearby. Sarah edged back to look. The figure had an Agency mark. Friendly. Then another shot rang out. This time it was the shooter, as it came from above. Plotting a course around the enemy at her level, she reached higher ground. With shrubbery for protection, Sarah aimed at the window of the building where the shooter had been last seen. The simulation caused a curtain to stir, but Sarah did not fire, afraid of giving away her location. She waited for a body part to show. More shots rang out below her, but finally the shooter's head appeared briefly. Sarah quickly squeezed the trigger.

The overhead lights came on and Leatherneck's voice sounded in her ear. "Well despite being dead, you still managed to get the shooter."

Sarah stood up, frustrated, and looked to the observation room. She spoke into her mic. "What are you talking about?"

"You were shot twice. Once by the little group of baddies below you and once by your own guys when you were turned around. That guy you spied out had shot you."

"Why did the simulation do that?"

"You can't get in the line of fire of the other agents. You have to watch for that."

"Of course. But why let me finish?"

"I wanted to see if you could 'outsmart' the shooter. You did a great job on that one. Just like your dad and mom used to do in the field."

"But they're still alive. It was my ghost who got the shooter."

"Now, now. This was your first time. They always backed each other up. You were on your own here. Trust me, I was impressed. Of course, I'm only supposed to be training you in the use of the sidearms. Wong will tell you more about strategy, methods, etc."

Sarah met Leatherneck in the hallway outside the simulation arena. She pulled the magazines from her pocket.

He let out a short laugh. "You never used your spare mags."

"I was prepared for a firefight. There wasn't one."

"Well every simulation is different. You might need them next time." Leatherneck took the magazines. "Let's go back to the armory. You can do a little target practice while Hill and I clean this place up. Then we both can work on surveillance equipment."

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Looking from one box to the other, Sarah attempted to decide which ones would be more suitable for Matt. _How does one decide on ornaments for a guy?_ She began to doubt the wisdom of her gift. _Maybe he'll be annoyed at having a girly thing to worry about, when he's been working so hard. Christmas is coming, the wedding, we have to move his stuff to the new apartment…_

She made her decision and headed home with the ornaments.

Her father, who was not nearly as enthusiastic about Christmas as her mother, was surprisingly happy to help Sarah pack the tree into her car.

"Thanks for helping, Daddy."

"Of course. Let Matt help you get it into his apartment. No offense, but this thing is a bit heavy for you, even if you do work out." Leaning on the car door, Lee reached over and playfully tested his daughter's bicep.

Smirking, Sarah swatted at her father. "You are probably glad to have this out of the garage. It won't be taking up space anymore."

"Yeah." Lee drew the word out, as if he was debating whether to continue his thought. "Actually, I think it was a nice idea to give it to Matt."

"I'm hoping he'll like it."

"Sometimes a man needs a woman to help him really appreciate holidays. Until I met your mother, I was perfectly content to spend Christmas watching football games, eating guacamole, and drinking champagne."

"With one of your girlfriends?"

Lee frowned. "No. Never. I hate that you know about all that. There may have been a girl or two whom I thought I cared for, but for the most part, all of those women were shallow. I never truly loved a woman until I met your mom."

"I'm not proud about wasting all that time with Jeff."

"Oh, well. He was just keeping you off the market until Matt could come along."

"Daddy!" Sarah glared at her father as she reprimanded him. "I wasn't head over heels with Jeff, but…" She let her words trail off as she could see the twinkle in her father's eyes. _He may be teasing you, but there's truth in his words._

"But I was telling you about your mom and Christmas. I was even annoyed when she tried to shake me out of my routine. One day I realized it was all a front. I admitted to myself that I was lonely for true companionship. Christmas really made it hit home, so I had tried to stick to that silly routine as a defense mechanism." _I'm starting to sound like Kirby. I've been spending too much time with that shrink._

Lee shut the rear passenger door of the car. "I guess I'm just saying that this is a nice gift. It will mean more to Matt than you think."

Sarah was quiet for a moment as she looked at her father. Smiling, she leaned towards him and kissed him on the cheek. "Thanks, Daddy. I love you."

Lee reddened slightly, but offered her a dimpled grin. "Love you, too, Pumpkin. Have fun this evening."

He lifted his hand in a small wave as she backed out of the driveway, watching as she drove down the street.

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Shaking off his weariness, Matt scrambled to finish the dinner preparations before Sarah arrived. It was too early to eat dinner, but he wanted time to relax with Sarah. It seemed as if they rarely had time just to sit together lately. _Except for a little while last night, you've hardly spent any time alone with her since last weekend. And you were both exhausted from shopping and working on the wedding registry then._ He scanned his collection of Blu-ray discs, then feeling inspired, scanned the online rental choices, looking for Christmas movies.

Involuntarily, his mind went to the case that had occupied so much of his and Rene's time over the last two weeks. Posing as graduate students at the University of Virginia, they felt they had come close to uncovering a terrorist recruitment ring, which was intent on gaining new members to strengthen their espionage efforts. He and Rene had been forced to attend meetings and other graduate program activities under the pretense that they would soon be joining UVa's engineering department. Yesterday's meeting had required a full-scale intelligence operation so the meeting and their interactions with other department members could be recorded. Today's meeting had required the same level of assistance. Timing was running out. Soon the school would break for the holidays—they only had less than a week to catch the female professor who they were fairly certain was running the recruitment efforts.

Matt was determined not to have to resume the case after his honeymoon. He did not want to have to attend classes and student teach. However, it might be wrapped up anyway. Two male students, Tony and Ali, were showing signs of being the recruiters. They had befriended Rene and Matt, even going so far as to try to set Matt up with a girl. Rene had had no sympathy.

"Don't be mad at me for telling them you're engaged, man. They don't bug me because of my wedding ring."

"I didn't want them to know a fiancée exists. What if they are the terrorists and they went after her?"

"You're using a cover name. They won't be able to figure out it's Sarah if you don't want them to know."

"I don't want to take any chances."

"You should play along with them, Matt. Makes your cover seem more real. That's why I told them you're engaged; you can give them a cover story and they'll leave you alone." Rene frowned.

The idea of including Sarah in his cover made Matt's stomach tie in knots. _You're going to have to get used to the idea of your wife being in the field—at least for a little while._ He hoped that the case would be wrapped up before she became his wife.

The sudden knock on the door came as a welcome relief. Now he could be distracted. Opening the door, he was quick to greet Sarah. "Hi." He stepped aside to allow her entrance.

"Hi."

After closing the door once again, he gazed at her for a moment. "You look lovely." Her answering blush only added to her beauty in his eyes. She wore his favorite skinny jeans and under her leather jacket was a powder blue mohair sweater. A scarf of varying shades of blue and green was draped around her neck, and she wore a simple pair of flat slip-ons.

He stepped over to her and kissed her quickly on the lips, then moved around behind her, putting his hands on her shoulders. "Here, let me help you with your jacket. It must have stopped raining. You're dry."

She turned to face him. "Yes, it did stop raining, and actually, I'd like to keep my jacket on for a little while longer." At Matt's puzzled expression, she continued. "I was hoping you could help me carry something in from the car."

"Ah. You're finally packing. Good idea. We can bring your things here box by box and move everything all at once from here to the new place."

"Um, that is a good idea. But it's not exactly like that." Smiling, she gestured to the coat closet. "Grab your jacket and I'll show you."

Matt wasted no time following Sarah outside to her car.

"A Christmas tree?"

Sarah grinned at Matt's boyish reaction as he saw the box in her backseat. Feeling foolish for having doubted her idea, she pushed her worries aside as she helped him carry the tree inside. On the way back to the car for the ornaments, he eagerly wrapped an arm around her and pulled her to his side. "This will be fun, decorating a tree this evening. I had some movies picked out, but this will be much better."

"Maybe we could do both. Or watch a movie tomorrow."

Handing Matt the bags of newly-purchased ornaments, she grabbed another bag from behind her seat and locked the car. Once in the apartment, she reached into her bag and produced a box.

"Oh great! Hot chocolate!"

Sarah smiled to herself. "Yes. I noticed you didn't have any last time I was here. I'll make us each a mugful if you'll get us some Christmas music going on your iPhone."

"You thought of everything."

As they finished setting up the tree, Matt stood back with Sarah, staring at the lights that seemed to twinkle in the now-darkened living room. "I can't tell you how much it means to me that you came up with such a thoughtful gift idea." He placed his hands on her shoulders. "But I didn't expect you to go to any trouble for me this Christmas."

"Oh, well. Mom and Daddy were happy to donate the tree. It was my grandmother's, but she only used it a few times. My mom likes her big tree. It worked out perfectly."

"It's a nice tree. And just the right size for an apartment. But you've been doing so much for the wedding. This was yet another project for you."

"I just have the wedding favors. My mom is fitting the wedding dress once that arrives in the next week or two, so I don't have to go far for that."

"And there's the shower next weekend. Plus, your parents got tickets for the four of us to go to the Kennedy Center."

"But those are only for a few hours. And the Kennedy Center will be so wonderful. I love the Christmas Pops concert. The shower is only for an afternoon."

"With thank you notes to write afterwards." He drew her close. "I guess all of this is to be expected. It just seems like you are so busy." _And I don't even want to mention the depositions and other legal proceedings that will happen over the next two weeks._ "It was really nice of your parents to get us tickets to the concert."

"Well, they try to do something with Phillip's and Jamie's families this time of year. I guess this will be our tradition with them. I hope you enjoy it, too."

"I'm sure I will."

"I just wish I could do more for you."

"Oh, no." Reaching out, he fingered the tree. "I love my Christmas gift. This is all I need for Christmas."

"You are sweet to say that. And you're right—I am busy. But Leatherneck is usually pretty easy on me. I don't work that many hours." She stepped away.

"_Usually_ easy on you?"

"Today was kind of hard." Sarah pulled the boxes of ornaments out of the bags and set them on the coffee table.

"Was it the simulations?" Matt sat down on the couch and watched her open the boxes.

"Yes."

"And?"

"I'm getting eighties and even a ninety on my target shooting. But I flunked the simulation today."

Matt rested his head on the back of the couch, relaxing. "Oh, well that's okay, especially with your high target shooting scores. Have you ever played video games? It can be hard to get used to."

"That's not it. I went into the arena. I was shot twice, but Leatherneck didn't tell me and I took out the shooter."

"That's great! Wow. I can't believe you're already in the arena." Matt leaned forward. "Sarah, everyone gets shot their first time through. I had field experience and I got shot."

"Really?"

"Yeah. And hardly anyone takes out the shooter the first time through. Of course, people who get shot are usually too dead to do that." Matt grinned ruefully.

Rolling her eyes, Sarah chose to ignore that remark. "Come on. You can help me decorate the tree. I didn't get that many ornaments, since we'll have to take them back off the tree in a couple of weeks when you move. Plus, I figure we'll collect them over the years. My parents have a ton."

Chuckling, Matt agreed with her. "Good idea. My parents have a lot, too." He picked one up, affixed a hook, and took the ornament to the tree.

He grew serious. "You're doing a great job with your target shooting, Sarah, and you showed that you have good instincts today. You'll get the hang of the arena. It's really something that Leatherneck already thought you were ready for it."

"I hope you're right."

"I know I am." Turning from the tree, he put his arms around her. "Now, no more shop talk." After giving her a kiss, he went for another ornament.

While the dinner heated, Matt sat with Sarah in the living room, lit only by the Christmas tree. Pulling her close, he rested his arm across her shoulders and leaned down to place a kiss on her hair. She turned to look up at him. Her eyes were shining in that way that he loved. He brought his mouth to hers. After a few moments, he pulled away just enough to murmur in her ear. "I love my Christmas present. Thank you." He trailed little kisses along her jaw as he ran his hand down her arm. He plucked gently at her sleeve. "And I love this sweater. You're so soft."

Sarah found herself sighing quietly as she angled her neck so Matt could kiss her there. She ran her hands over his chest, letting them rest on his shoulders. As his hands moved around her waist and over her back, his lips continued to travel along her collarbone, then downward. Finding the neckline of her sweater, he brought his lips back to her mouth and kissed her deeply. Just as she was wondering if she should politely extricate herself before things could go too far, Matt pulled away.

Taking a deep, ragged breath, he stood up. "There's a little time before dinner. Let's dance. We can watch the movie afterwards."

Sarah drew her own deep breath. "Good idea."

Matt took his iPhone from the side table and selected a playlist before placing the phone in the dock. He turned back to her and took her in his arms. "Sometimes the time seems to drag by. Four weeks seems like a long time at the moment."

She nodded in understanding.

As they danced to Bing Crosby's "White Christmas," Matt rested his head against Sarah's. His voice was apologetic. "I'm sorry I took it that far. I know better."

"It was just a couple of inches farther south than before. We'll be married soon."

"And I tempted both of us."

"It was pretty nice, but if you hadn't ended it, I was going to think of way to do it." She caressed his shoulder and gripped his hand tighter with her other hand. "But I'm glad I didn't have to say anything. Don't worry about it, Matt."

"I'm glad you didn't have to say anything, too."

"I haven't had to, yet. That's a pretty good track record." She pulled her head back just far enough so she could reach up to plant a kiss on his cheek. She grinned at him before saying, "And I'll be sure to pack this sweater when we go on our honeymoon."

Matt's mouth tipped at her remark. "We have a list of things for you to bring on the honeymoon. This sweater, a certain kiss I won't forget…" He brushed his knuckles along her jaw and looked into her eyes.

Nestling her head against his shoulder, she felt his cheek rest on her hair once again as they continued dancing together.


	4. Chapter 4

Cooling down after their run through Rock Creek Park, Matt and Sarah walked toward his car. He stopped her for a moment as the path curved past a sheltered slope above the creek. Icicles still clung to the barren shrubs and a few dead leaves and berries were still encased in ice. He pulled out his phone and snapped a close-up photo of some of the branches.

Sarah leaned in to look at the photo as Matt sent it to his sisters and parents. Before she knew what he was doing, he put his arm around her and aimed the camera at their faces.

"Smile!"

Knowing it was useless to protest, Sarah smiled, hoping she did not look too bedraggled after her run. She smoothed her hair quickly before he snapped the photo. "I'm sure my hair is a mess."

Smiling to himself as he looked at the photo before sending it, Matt was quick to argue. "No. You look gorgeous. Your cheeks are pink from the cold. And I love the way your hair gets all wispy around your face when you run."

"You are biased, my love."

"No. I'm right."

After leaning in for a quick kiss, Matt flipped Sarah's braid playfully, and then wrapped his arm around her shoulders. He was still warm from the run, and smelled of aftershave and deodorant. Chilled slightly, Sarah leaned into his embrace, enjoying his closeness. Continuing back to his car, they stopped occasionally to take in the scenery around them before they reached the parking lot. They stretched for a few minutes before getting into the Charger.

He started the engine, and then turned to her. "I've been thinking. Your dad told me you have your own ski equipment. I'm kind of partial to my own. I know it's a hassle, but I'd like to bring our skis with us to Colorado. Would you mind?" He looked over his shoulder and began backing the car out. "Your dad even offered to get your skis tuned when he took his in. I guess he's planning to take your mom skiing sometime soon."

"I don't mind. We can wear our jackets on the plane. But we'll still need a big suitcase to hold our other gear. We'll have extra baggage."

"Yeah, I thought of that. It's worth it to me. Still cheaper than renting, and less hassle in the long run." Watching for traffic, Matt waited, and then turned out of the parking lot.

"I should get a new ski bib soon. I tore my old one last year. I loved that bib, too."

Matt looked over at her. "You know, there's a sale at the sporting goods store near my apartment. I've been wracking my brain, trying to think of a Christmas present for you. I'd love to take you shopping today, if you're willing."

"Oh, that's sweet, Matt. But you didn't want to go to a store today."

"This will be different. You'll be modeling for me." He waggled his eyebrows suggestively at her and chuckled when she narrowed her eyes. "We'll go after lunch. I'm really looking forward to that soup and the homemade bread you have back at your apartment. I'm starved."

Sarah giggled. "You're always starved after we run. And you always like my mom's bread."

He grinned sheepishly over at her but did not say anything.

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Lee met them on the driveway as they were preparing to go to the store. Both Matt and Sarah were carrying boxes of books.

"Here, Matt. Let me help you with that while you unlock the car."

"Thanks, Lee. And thanks to you and Amanda for the Christmas tree. It's great."

While Matt busied himself unlocking the car and placing Sarah's box of books in the trunk, Lee took the opportunity to grin conspiratorially over at Sarah before Matt took the other box from him.

"It was our pleasure. I take it you have it all decorated, then?"

"Yeah. Sarah went all out."

"Looks like you're already moving things over. When do you get a key to the new place?"

"A couple of days before Christmas. I have to see where I show up on the roster before we can plan the moving day, though."

"I hope you don't have to pull a Christmas shift. We'd sure miss you here." Lee glanced over at Sarah, whose eyes widened slightly at his remark.

Matt glanced at Sarah, too. "There's a good chance I will, since I'm still a rookie and I had all of Thanksgiving week off." He took Sarah's hand. "But I'm sure I would have part of the day to spend with y'all."

Not failing to notice that Matt had slipped into his Texas mannerisms, Sarah guessed that he was longing for his family again. "If you have to pull a shift, I'll come and sit with you." She squeezed his hand.

"But Sarah, what if I have to go out in the field to back someone up?"

"I'll go home. You aren't sitting around the bullpen all by yourself on a holiday."

Lee looked from one face to the other, and then directed his comment to Sarah. "I know everyone would understand if you want to be with Matt. But I'm not sure if Francine will approve. Let's not worry about it until the roster is posted." He shifted his feet. "Listen, I wanted to ask you two about the skis. I'm taking mine and Amanda's to be tuned. Sarah's need a good tuning, too. Were you planning to bring them to Winterpark?"

"Yes, thanks, Daddy. That's sweet."

"If you want, I can get yours tuned, too, Matt."

"Thanks, Lee. I had them tuned last winter, then never got to the slopes. The wax is still in good shape."

"Okay. I'll let you know when Sarah's are ready. Shall I get the poles and other gear out for you? You might want to check your goggles and the helmet."

She made an embarrassed face and shot a look at Matt, whose gaze was directed at Lee. "Aw, gee, Daddy. I don't know about the helmet. I haven't worn it since high school, when I tried snowboarding."

Matt cleared his throat. "Maybe you wouldn't mind wearing it for my peace of mind, Sweetie. You had two head injuries this fall." At her expression, he quickly amended his request. "I'll wear one, too."

"You two are acting like I'm a befuddled old lady."

"Of course not. I know you're a capable skier. I'm sure Matt doesn't doubt your ability. You might not remember how bad it was at the beginning, after the second time you were hurt."

Glancing from one man to the other, Sarah knew there was no point in fighting. At least she knew the men in her life cared about her.

After sighing heavily, she walked back to the garage, talking as went. "I'll get the helmet and goggles, Daddy, if you don't mind getting the poles. I'm not sure where they are, anyway." She knew Matt and her father would be sharing triumphant grins over winning the argument with her, and she did not care to watch.

Soon the gear had joined the boxes of books.

Lee stepped back from Matt's trunk, where he had just deposited Sarah's poles. "Where are you two headed now?"

"I'm taking Sarah to get a new ski bib."

"It's a Christmas present, Daddy."

"Ah, great. Well, have fun." He eyed Matt's athletic bag, slung over his shoulder when they had come from the apartment, now stowed in the open trunk of his car, underneath the poles. He knew that Matt had not stayed over—he had merely showered after their run. But he was not planning to come back to Sarah's that day. "I guess I'll see you tomorrow. I imagine you'll be busy for the rest of the day."

"Probably, Daddy. We're stopping at a friend's for a Christmas party this evening—then we'll probably catch a movie." Sarah gave her father a hug and a peck on the cheek. "Give Mom a kiss for me."

"I will, Pumpkin."

On the way to the sporting goods store, Sarah stared out the window.

"A penny for your thoughts."

She laughed softly and turned to Matt. "You haven't said that in a while."

"You're pretty quiet."

"I was just thinking that Daddy seemed kind of… I don't know how to say it. It wasn't overprotective. Clingy doesn't sound right, either."

"I was wondering if it's starting to hit him—his little girl is really leaving home for good this time."

"I was kind of hoping it wasn't that. I want him to be happy for me."

"But it's natural for parents to feel that way. I think all that stuff with my dad was a form of it. It was really hitting him that I'm not going back to Texas."

"You think that's why he was so on edge with us?"

"On edge is a nice way to put it. But at least he's better now. And it seems like your dad's trying to deal with it, too."

"Yes. He just seemed kind of sad, almost."

"Well, we'll see him tomorrow. And at least you aren't moving away. It's not even twenty minutes in traffic. I've made it to your place in less than fifteen minutes many times."

"You're right." She sighed.

After taking her hand and bringing it to his lips briefly, he held it the rest of the way to the store.

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Amanda watched her husband as he loaded the skis in the back of their Volvo SUV. After closing the back hatch, he turned and seeing her there, startled.

"Sorry."

"Used to be me who would sneak up on you." He wore an embarrassed smile on his face.

"As I always say, I learned from the best. I just was wondering if you wanted me to come along. I could help you carry the skis."

"Sure. Maybe we could wait an hour or two before we go and we could have dinner afterwards. I'm just dropping these off."

"That would be nice. Better than leftovers."

Following Lee to the garage, Amanda stood by as he locked up the storage cabinets and started rearranging items on the shelves nearby.

"We're not going skiing until after the wedding. It was nice of you to do this so far ahead of our trip—it's one less thing for Matt and Sarah to worry about."

"Sure." He stood back and looked at the shelves. "Seems like this garage is emptying out. We have a lot more space already with Sarah's ski equipment and the other Christmas tree gone. I noticed she took a couple of boxes of keepsakes off the shelves in the guest room closet, too."

"This is more than just going off to college, isn't it? Our little girl is going to make her own home."

"Well, she doesn't have to clean out all traces of herself."

Amanda smiled indulgently as she walked with Lee back into the house. "Cup of coffee?"

"Sure. There's still a bit of a nip in the air out there."

Amanda waited until they were seated at the kitchen table before she spoke again.

"You know, Lee, it's natural for a young woman to bring all of her things to her new home when she gets married. The boys didn't do it because…well, they're guys. It seemed like Amy and Jennifer were more interested in all of their old keepsakes than the boys were at first. It took Phillip and Jamie a few years before they wanted to have things like old photo albums and yearbooks around their houses. Besides, they were still getting over Joe's death."

"She could store things here. We have a lot of room."

"Sweetheart. She and Matt have plenty of storage space. It's just a few boxes of keepsakes, ski equipment, and books. She wants to have them on hand."

"But she could come here to look at them. Save the trouble of moving them from place to place. They're probably going to buy a house in a couple of years."

Amanda hid her smile. "We don't know that. But what I do know is that when I was young and newly married, having my things around was a comfort to me as I got used to living in a new home."

Lee looked up from his coffee, considering her words.

"As much as a new bride is excited about being married and being with her new husband, she can be homesick, too. I remember being sad about moving away from my parents for the last time."

Lee snorted softly. "She wasn't sad to go up to NYU every year. Especially when Jeff was in the picture. And sometimes we hardly saw Sarah when she was at Georgetown. I had to make lunch dates in order to get a chance to talk with her."

"This is different. It's for good. She's not coming back for the next school holiday."

Looking out the window next to his seat, Lee hid his face from his wife. Her words had struck a nerve. "I was always so busy whenever she was home. Then we stopped going on vacation together. I never gave her the time I should have given her."

"Of course you did. You planned your days off around Sarah and me."

"Still, I wasn't home a lot of evenings." Lee stared into his mug.

"Neither was she. But you wouldn't be this close if you had neglected her the way you say you did. How many fathers and daughters have almost weekly lunch dates?"

"True. I guess I'm just sorry you and I didn't retire a little sooner, or ask her to move into the apartment above the garage sooner."

"The timing couldn't have worked out more perfectly, Lee. Sarah was busy with her Master's work until May, and we weren't mentally ready to retire until then. We've been available to support her through some tough times, and we've been here to enjoy seeing her fall in love with the man of your dreams."

"Very funny. Her dreams, not mine." He took a swig of his coffee.

"You know exactly what I mean, Stetson. You love Matt just as much as I do."

Smiling sheepishly, Lee reached for Amanda's hand. "Yeah, but it wasn't very hard. He's a great kid. We're pretty lucky."

She took another sip from her mug. "You know, you could still have father-daughter lunch dates."

"Hey, that's a great idea."

"Of course you'll have to be flexible, with her training starting. If anyone should understand that, it would be you."

"Sure. I could bring her lunch on rough days. Might cheer her up. I hear James Wong is just as tough as Mrs. Stetson."

"Oh, now. I wasn't that bad."

"No, you weren't. You were a regular mother hen."

"Wong is only tough because he wants his rookies to be safe and keep others that way. He's not unnecessarily unkind. That's why Francine chose him."

"Let's hope he isn't too hard on the next Stetson. Phillip and Jamie both developed a bad taste for field work. No one would cut them any slack; they were afraid of being accused of babying the boss's kid."

"Let's not borrow trouble. Leatherneck had that very concern in mind when he offered to help Sarah. She's doing a great job, according to you." Amanda stood up. "Well, if we're going out soon, I should finish the laundry. You done with your coffee?"

"No. I think I'll nurse it for a bit longer. I'll take into the office with me."

Amanda watched her husband as he ambled up the steps to the foyer, mug in hand. He seemed less out of sorts, but she knew she had her work cut out for her.

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As he labeled the box of books he had just finished packing, Matt took a moment to observe Sarah. Perched on one of the seats for his weight machine, she had stopped to look at a biography before packing it in the box at her feet. Her progress had been much slower than his, but he had been pleased to see her fascination with his book collection. _Maybe when things slow down, we can read together._ He knew Sarah was always in the middle of a book—sometimes he would find one on her coffee table. Except for the time in the safe house when they had read together, he had had less time for them since their relationship had begun. Certainly she had a lot of books in her own collection. He eyed the growing stacks of boxes—some hers, some his—along his walls.

The move had turned into another opportunity for getting to know Sarah even better. When they had brought the boxes of old trophies, dolls, and other treasures from her parents' house during the week, he had insisted on going through them with her. Each item had offered a glimpse into her past—things that could not be seen by looking at her parents' photo albums. Matt realized that it would be good to look through his own boxes of keepsakes with Sarah. But that would have to be after the move, at the rate they were going. They would need all of their spare time during the next two or three weeks just to pack his apartment. Still, Sarah seemed to be using this opportunity to get to know him better as well.

He spied the bag from the store. They had been successful finding a ski bib for her, and Matt had insisted on purchasing the matching jacket. He had to admit to himself that he had actually enjoyed shopping for a change. _Maybe because I like having an excuse to take care of my girl. And maybe because it means our honeymoon is really going to be happening. _He had already made plans for that trip. Rather than ski every day, he hoped they could sit and talk, or take a few hikes, maybe go for a drive here or there.

It was not as if they did not talk now, but sometimes they had to limit the amount of time they spent together. The temptation to become physical was just too great. And when it came right down to it, he was lonely at night. Soon they would not have to drive back and forth anymore just to see one another; they would be together every night.

His eyes went back to Sarah, who glanced up from the book and blushed. "I'm sorry. I keep getting distracted. You have some great titles here."

"I'm glad you like my books. Maybe we could read one together sometime and talk about it."

Her eyes shone in that appealing way. "I'd love that."

"Pick one out and we'll set it aside. We can start on the honeymoon."

She laughed.

"What?"

"It's just that—I kind of didn't see us reading on our honeymoon."

It was Matt's turn to blush. "Well, we might not read much, but…" He grew earnest. "No, seriously. Pastor Carlson told us to start traditions right away, pick some things we want to make habits. Reading together would be great. You and I both love the same kinds of books."

"That's true. It would be fun. And it might be a good way to unwind after a stressful day. Make it easier to sleep. I always read before bed."

Matt found himself imagining other reasons why it might be good to unwind and forced himself to stop that train of thought. "Well, you pick the first book. We can read one of mine. I haven't looked at them in at least a year."

"You brought these from Europe?"

"Sure. They were an investment. I ordered hardcovers so I could keep them. Besides, I didn't bring furniture back with me—just some boxes and suitcases."

"Did you ever imagine that a year later you would be married?"

He laughed. "No. Not at all." Closing the distance between them, he took the book and laid it on the coffee table. Cupping Sarah's face in his hands, he spoke with certainty. "But I praise God all the time for you. I can't wait for us to be married." He kissed her then. As he pulled away, his expression left Sarah with no doubt about his words.

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Turning his attention from the football game he was watching with the male members of the Stetson/King clan, Matt caught Sarah's eye. Seeming to understand his unspoken feelings of affection, she smiled at him, and then bent her head once again to the task in front of her. Amanda, Jennifer, Amy, and Jessica were helping her make favors—bags of potpourri—for the wedding. In truth, it seemed like frivolity to him, but he knew it meant something to Amanda to have something for the guests to take home. Sarah, wanting to please her mother, had not put up a fight. Besides, she had reasoned, it was a nice tradition that did not cost that much.

His mind wandered to thoughts of the evening before. After making a video call to his parents together, Matt and Sarah had gone to their dance class's Christmas get-together. The party had been pleasant enough—Christina was a good cook who with their friends had offered a generous spread. He and Sarah had even brought their own contribution. Matt had not been hungry when he and Sarah said their goodbyes and went to the movie alone together. He never tired of taking her to movies with plenty of suspense and action—she was sure to reach for his hand, and pushing the armrest up, would snuggle up against him. And it had probably been good that the movie had gone late, if the goodnight kiss they had shared at her door was any indication of how things might have transpired had he gone inside.

Phillip elbowed him hard. "Hey Granger, get your eyes back on the game. You just missed the touchdown."

Lee glanced over at Matt, who had put on his "agent face," despite his ears turning a pale shade of pink. He was not a betting man any longer, but if he was, he would wager money that Matt had been watching Sarah and not the game. Amused that Matt was having difficulty hiding his embarrassment, he made a mental note to tease him about it later. His eyes fell on Sarah.

She was talking with Phillip and Amy's daughter, Jessica. Ever since she was a baby, Amanda and Lee's granddaughter had been close to her aunt. Now she was making plans for Christmas—she was eager to watch some animated film her parents had just purchased. "…we can watch it after we open presents. David and Seth always want to play basketball or get on the Wii. They'll probably have another Wii game, anyway."

Lee hid a wry smile. Jessica knew her cousins well. And he knew that Amanda had spent that very morning wrapping gifts—including a Wii game for their grandsons.

"I will watch it with you, Jessica, but I'm not sure if it will be on Christmas Eve or Christmas. It depends on Matt's schedule. I'm going to keep him company at work."

"Really? That's so boring. You should stay at Grandma and Grandpa's and watch the movie with me."

Sarah started to say something, but Amy stopped her. "If you had to go to work on Christmas, you'd be lonely, too. Sarah needs to be with Matt. You two will find a time to watch the movie."

"I guess some day when I'm in love, I'll understand."

Amy colored in embarrassment and mouthed her apology to Sarah.

Lee tried hard not to chuckle out loud. Jessica was beginning to sound more and more like her father Phillip every day. _Soon she'll be calling her cousins dorkface or something. God, it was a battle trying to get the boys to stop that habit._

Lee's attention turned to the movement on the floor before him. Seth was busy planting his elbow repeatedly in David's ribs, and Lee could tell David was preparing to give him a solid punch in the arm. He got up and stretched. "Who wants to shoot some hoops with me?"

David and Seth tripped over each other as they ran for the door, barely stopping to grab their jackets as they went out to the backyard. Matt got up, too. "I'll get my jacket and join you out there."

Sarah watched them, wishing she could go out and shoot hoops, too. She bent her head once again to the task of making wedding favors.

Later that night as they spoke on the phone, Matt laughed with Sarah over the incident. "Jessica is growing up, isn't she?"

She laughed softly before replying. "Yes. I'm afraid she's starting to sound like her father and Seth. Maybe they are influencing her. Just six months ago she would have died before saying something like that."

"Lauren is like that, too. She started noticing things when she was about that age—twelve, I guess. She was really after me at Thanksgiving—kept giving me advice."

Sarah laughed self-consciously. "I got a little of it, too."

"At least Jessica still looks up to you. And you'll find time to watch the movie with her. It's nice that she helps you with the wedding preparations."

"I have my own theory on that one. She has a crush on you. I think she wants to impress you."

Matt was glad Sarah could not see his reddening face. He knew about Jessica's crush, and he tried hard not to encourage it without hurting her feelings at the same time.

He lay back on his bed, crooking one arm under his head. It was time to change the subject. "Hey, do you realize that four weeks from tonight we'll be in Winterpark, as Mr. and Mrs. Matthew Granger?" A soft laugh escaped his lips and his voice seemed to lower in tone. "And when we're in bed, we won't have to use the phone to talk with one another." He could hear her sharp intake of air and smiled in response.

"I'm not sure you're going to make it through the next four weeks, at the rate you're going." Sarah touched her fingers to her lips, remembering. They had eaten dinner at their favorite Italian restaurant that night—a little "mom and pop" kind of place named Martini's. The waitress who usually served them knew them well, and they always sat next to each other in a booth. Sometimes Matt stole a kiss or two, and tonight had been no different. It was a good thing that he said good night again at her door, although like the evening before, he had not been shy about the kiss.

It was Matt's turn to sigh. "I'm praying about that. I hope you don't mind me not coming in when it's late or we're tired. I had a really great time with you this weekend. So great that I just didn't trust myself inside your apartment."

"This waiting thing is so hard." She grew quiet, hesitating before she spoke again. "You know, the birth control pills are probably working by now."

"Oh, Sarah. If that was the only thing stopping me… You know, I had something with me the day I proposed to you."

"Oh." She digested his words. She already knew that it was more than the risks that had them waiting. He wanted it to be special as much as she did. She wondered, though, if when he had pledged to wait until marriage, he had realized how hard it would be. "But you're miserable."

"I'll survive. We would always regret it if we gave in now. I love you too much to make it all about the physical attraction we have. There are so many things I love about you. One of the best things about this weekend was watching you go through my books. And our run—I love sharing things with you."

"The park can be beautiful this time of year. And it's pretty great that we can run together like that. I love it. Since high school, I haven't had any friends who ran with me."

"It is pretty great to have someone to work out with." He paused before continuing. "You know, I counted you as my best friend before we got together as a couple—I felt a camaraderie with you from the very start."

"I felt the same way. I just enjoy being with you. We're best friends first."

"Exactly. So, I guess we just keep praying, right? And plan to have a great honeymoon."

Hearing his quiet laugh made her want to laugh, too. She decided to lighten things up. "And if we just can't wait any longer, we have the license. A quick trip before a justice of the peace and…"

"…your mother will be crushed, which means your dad would never forgive me…"

"…or me. You'll be a great son-in-law. You already know my parents well." She chuckled softly. "Well, my love. It's time I went to bed. Leatherneck wants me to fire the .22 rifle before we meet with the attorneys." She shuddered at the thought.

"It won't be too bad. It's easier than your Glock. It won't have as much kick. And hey, I'll see you at the meeting. You sure you're okay?" He waited for her response, trying to hear in her voice if she would be okay on her own.

"Of course." Her voice was cheerful. "They're just prepping us. Daddy said they wouldn't be asking questions tomorrow anyway."

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

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Matt leaned back in his chair outside the conference room, early for the meeting. He had never been deposed by an attorney before, particularly not as an intelligence agent. To make sure they understood the process, a member of the Agency legal team was meeting with the newer agents who had worked with Brad Smith.

Matt brightened at Sarah's approach. "Oh good. We can talk for a minute before the others get here."

Smiling, Sarah gave him a quick peck on the cheek as she sat down next to Matt. "You texted, so I came."

"How was the rifle?"

"You were right. It's easier to fire. I was more accurate." She grinned self-consciously. "I kind of liked it for a change."

"Great. You can go hunting with Dad and me next fall."

Sarah's eyes widened. "Um…not that much."

"I'm kidding." He laughed at her look of relief.

"Oh, good." She grinned back at him. "You know, I should have gone along with you. You've been teasing me more and more lately. I need to get you back."

"Guys only tease the women they love."

"That's not entirely true. My brothers tease me."

Matt rolled his eyes. "Okay, the women they care about."

"Oh, no. We're not the only early ones." During their conversation, Sarah had worked her way towards Matt; their knees were now touching and she could see he was looking at her that way he often did before he kissed her. At her warning, they both sat up in their chairs.

"Aww, it's the lovebirds."

Johnson punched Gonzales playfully in the arm. "Leave 'em alone, idiot. It's not like Sarah smooched him on the cheek or anything when she sat down."

Eyes flashing, Matt started to say something, but Rene came over and put a hand on his shoulder. "Take it easy, bro. We stopped by Phillip's office to check some surveillance footage of UVa and we spotted you guys on one of the monitors. Just be glad you weren't making out."

Sarah reddened, but did not say anything. She put her hand on Matt's arm and leaned in to whisper, "Sorry."

He whispered back, "Don't be sorry. I guess we'll just have to get used to this." He got up, offering his hand to help her up before walking with her into the meeting.


	5. Chapter 5

Lee tapped his fingers on the steering wheel impatiently as he waited for the light at Maplewood Drive. He worked his jaw absentmindedly as he stared at the signal.

"Hey, Stetson. You're grinding your teeth again."

Glancing over at Amanda, he let his mouth fall open a little, relaxing his jaw. "You know I'm always tense after these attorney things."

"You said they didn't even ask you about the park."

"No. They started with the Brad Smith business. I didn't have much to offer there. I guess his case is coming up first."

"But you're thinking about the park?"

"Yeah."

Reaching over to massage her husband's neck, Amanda gave it a quick rub before he pulled into the driveway.

Turning to her, Lee was still serious. "It's going to be rough for Sarah. These guys are tough. She's got the most to say. The defense guys will back her into a corner, as you can imagine. But the prosecuting attorneys are out for Smith's blood. They will make sure her testimony is rock solid. They're going to really push her for every detail and make sure everything is consistent."

"Oh. But at least Greg Peterson can be there to help, right? They'll allow the Agency attorney to accompany our people. And he'll look out for Sarah. He's watched her grow up."

"Yes, but he can only do so much."

As they walked into the house, Amanda tried to be cheerful. "Well, she'll have other things to keep her busy this week, anyway. Besides taking her and Matt to the Pops concert this week—"

"—great idea getting those tickets for Friday, by the way. It will be a nice way for us all to unwind after talking to the attorneys all week." Lee took her coat and hung it in the closet, then followed Amanda into the kitchen, leaning against the counter as she prepared two cups of coffee.

"Then, there's the sampling dinner at the caterer's."

Lee looked uncomfortable. He ventured cautiously. "You still okay with me having Matt here for beer and pizza while you two sample the food?"

Amanda rolled her eyes. "Stetson, I know how to pick my battles. You'd be all grumpy about going. Then, you and Matt would probably love the food—so much that you would say 'yes' to every dish they served. We'd never make any decisions with you there." She settled more comfortably in her seat. "Nope, we'll be fine on our own."

Lee watched as Amanda sipped her coffee.

"Have some coffee, Scarecrow."

He sat down slowly and took the mug in his hands. "Do you think you may have packed too much into this week for Sarah? She'll have the depositions this week and next. I'm sure Leatherneck won't let up on her training. Everyone wants to distract her."

"Keeping her busy should help keep her mind off of things."

"Or stress her out."

Amanda looked at Lee thoughtfully. "I guess I need to remember that she's your daughter, too. She often reacts to things more like you would."

"We've had this conversation before. She's still becoming her own person. She's a little like me, a little like you. Maybe I'm worrying too much."

"And she has Matt. He's done with his field work until after the wedding."

"Oh? I hadn't heard that."

"Yeah. He and Rene came back from their early morning meeting at the campus. Their 'advisor' told them to enjoy their Christmas break. No more meetings until the middle of January."

"Oh. That means they have to become real graduate students until the case is over."

"Yes. Matt will be able to say he's had graduate hours in engineering, if he ever wants to get an advanced degree."

"You already trying to help him change to a safer career? You sound like David."

Amanda chuckled. "Poor David. He was unhappy with Matt taking a job in the film business until he found out he was really in intelligence. Now he and Sharon are trying not to worry about him and Sarah."

Lee steered the conversation back to where it started. "So, Matt is back to background checks and following up on alerts, then?"

"Yeah. No more late nights for now, hopefully."

"Good. All these depositions will keep him busy enough without having to be undercover. That's a lot of stress, too. These kids should be enjoying their engagement, not reliving some nightmare." He ran a hand through his hair and sat back in his chair.

Amanda got up, taking their coffee cups to the sink. "Well, at least it's Christmastime. After this week, things should get better."

"I hope so, too."

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"Let's try one more of these observation exercises, Junior."

Sarah sighed heavily. With her elbow on the table, she rested her head on her hand. "Leatherneck, I'm going to be too worn out mentally for the deposition. If they ever decide to call me."

"We'll try some lock picking next."

It was after two o'clock in the afternoon. After running through a simulation with the pop-ups that morning, Leatherneck had sent Sarah over to Jamie's office to help his team with some research. Taking a break for her usual Tuesday lunch date with Matt—eaten in a crowded restaurant because of the falling snow—she had reported back to the quartermaster's offices for observation exercises.

She wanted to scream out that she was sick of all the training. She did not want to fire another gun, pick another lock, or run from yet another hidden sniper. _Maybe I'm not cut out for this work after all. Now that I'm in the thick of it, I'm miserable. Except for the break in Jamie's office today._

She remembered asking Matt if he ever grew tired of his job as they had walked back through the snow to the Agency. He had been wearing the hat Amanda had purchased for him in Almaty, and she had pulled up the hood on her coat. The bracing temperature of the December snowstorm had been refreshing.

Matt had not replied immediately, instead taking a moment to observe her. "I'm not sure I'd say I grow tired of it. But sometimes I get stressed if it's a tough case or I'm personally involved."

Sarah knew that he had been referring to the weeks before their attack. He had been beside himself with worry over her.

"Sometimes the workload gets to me. Although Francine has been easy on me the last few months, I'm going to have to work more starting in January. At least until the case at UVa is resolved."

"Well, at least it's in engineering. Maybe you'll learn something useful in your graduate classes. At least you don't have any classes to T.A."

"Yet." He had looked over at Sarah again. He took her hand and drew her under an awning, where they were sheltered from the wind and falling snow. "Sweetie, why did you ask me about work just now?"

"Oh, I was just curious."

He had narrowed his eyes. "We both know you had a reason. You have so much on your plate right now. Maybe you should ask Leatherneck for a break this week. Or maybe you could postpone this meeting with the caterer. We could just watch a DVD together." At her look, he amended his suggestion. "I'd get something from the new releases at the box at the grocery store. Then we'll pay better attention to the movie."

She had laughed. "I can't put off the caterer. They have a busy schedule—they squeezed us in. We have to settle the menu this week."

"Maybe you'll eat better there than you did at lunch."

"I was just not as hungry as usual. I guess I'm kind of wound up."

"At least you're being honest now." He had looked around, frowning. "I'd like to pray with you right now, but this isn't the best place."

"But it's a good reminder."

In the quartermaster's offices, Sarah smiled ruefully. She should pray right now while Leatherneck was out of the room. She had forgotten to stop in the women's restroom to pray once she and Matt had gone their separate ways. But it was too late to pray here. She heard someone clear their throat.

"Excuse me."

Sarah turned around to see the intern looking about the room. "Are you looking for Leatherneck?"

"Yes." He stepped forward and reached out a hand almost shyly. "I'm Grant Hill. I hear we may be part of the same training class. Sarah Stetson, right?"

"Yes. How do you do?" Shaking his hand, Sarah wondered if she should flash her ring after all, then brushed off her concerns. _He seems too shy to worry about._

"Your reputation precedes you."

"I'm not sure if that is good or bad."

"Don't worry. I guess all of the training is going to be a formality for you, with the parents you have."

"I need it just as much as anyone else. That's why I'm here."

"That's not what I heard. Saved your fiancé's life, survived two flashbangs…"

Uncomfortable now, she looked to the doorway. _At least most of the Brad Smith case is classified._ She could hear Leatherneck carrying his tray from the other room.

"Were you looking for Leatherneck? That's him coming."

"Hill. Can you come back in twenty? I'll need help cleaning all of this up."

"Yes, Sir." Hill slipped out of the room as quietly as he had entered it.

"Okay. Turn around."

Sarah obeyed, swiveling in her chair so her back was to the table while Leatherneck brought the tray with the items she was to observe.

Hearing the telltale rattle of the various odds and ends on the metal surface, she blew out her breath in preparation for mental exercise.

"Okay, turn back to the table."

As Sarah swiveled back, Leatherneck pressed the button on the old-fashioned stopwatch and observed Sarah methodically scanning the tray. Before he could call time, she had sat back in her seat, turning away from the table once again.

Leatherneck came around to face Sarah as she rattled off the names of the items on the tray. "Nine millimeter magazine with 10 cartridges loaded, a note saying, "three cats, ten a.m.," a spool of burgundy thread, two shirt buttons, a wire brush, your bank credit card—do you want me to call out the last four digits? You sure trust me."

Leatherneck rolled his eyes. "Just finish the list."

When she finished, Sarah had correctly noted twelve of the fifteen items on the tray.

"That was your best yet." Leatherneck's phone buzzed. He pulled it from his shirt pocket and answered it. "Yeah. She's here. Sure. I understand. I'll send her over."

Sarah hoped that it was the attorneys wanting to depose her. But she knew they would have called her directly. Her phone had no missed calls and the signal, boosted on each floor of the underground complex to ensure uninterrupted service for the agents and other personnel, was excellent.

"Jamie needs you for the rest of the day."

Sarah imagined she was joining the team that was busy sorting through the details that had been derived at the University of Virginia engineering department meetings Matt and Rene had attended. Matt might be on the team this afternoon. Maybe if she could sit with him, it would calm her nerves—even if they were both busy on their computers.

But when she arrived in Jamie's department, Matt was not there.

"He's with the attorneys, Sarah." Rene looked sympathetic. He was a good friend to her, not just Matt, and he seemed to sense she was on edge. "He just left a few minutes ago when they called him. I was there earlier today."

"Okay." She took the partial list of student and faculty names that Jamie's assistant had given her and started searching the internet for the first name that was listed.

"They're tough. You should prepare yourself. They really grilled me about all my interactions with Smith when you were in the safe house. Then they practically made it look like I wanted to be gassed." Rene was still nursing his anger at Brad Smith's betrayal. The rogue agent had managed to get on the rotation to watch Sarah and Matt's safe house from the townhouse next door. At some point he had planted a gas canister that released noxious fumes once Brad hit the remote trigger. With Rene and Grace Tanaka lying helpless on the floor, Brad had made his move to abduct Sarah.

Sarah felt her stomach tie up in knots. She could not remember how she replied to Rene as she concentrated on her work. _At least Matt drove me in today. I can ride home with him._

Her phone rang. She got up to take the call in the hallway. "Hi, Mom. Oh? They need us there earlier?" She listened. Her face fell. "Okay. I'll be out on the street at five o'clock. Thanks for picking me up. I know it's out of your way."

Disappointed that she would probably not see Matt again until later that evening, she texted him her mother's plan to pick her up early from work to go to the tasting at the caterer. Matt would have to drive by himself over to the house on Maplewood, where Lee would eat dinner with him.

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Amanda kept an eye on her daughter surreptitiously while she also watched the road. It had been snowing all day, but it had finally stopped while they were at the caterers. She was thankful that the ice was at a minimum. Lee and Matt, both seemingly anxious, had texted them more than once, urging them to come straight home from their appointment.

Sarah had been tense all evening, but it had not been about the weather. Now she sat quietly, lost in her own thoughts, staring out the front window of the Volvo SUV.

"Matt and your father should be relieved that the streets are fairly clear."

"Hmm? Oh, yes. Daddy is funny about that. Especially after getting you this SUV so you wouldn't have trouble in the snow."

"Matt is a lot like your father sometimes."

"Yes, he is. But I know he tries not to be overprotective. He's gotten a lot better since we went to counseling together."

Amanda was sober. "He's young. It was the first time he'd experienced almost losing someone. From what I've heard, he saw a lot over in Afghanistan, but it was never his closest buddies." She patted Sarah's hand. "He's also a resilient person. He seems so happy right now."

"Yes. We are both so excited about the wedding being so soon, now. For his sake, I'm glad it will be sooner rather than later."

Glancing over at her daughter, Amanda hesitated before answering. "You know, no one would blame you for not waiting."

"To be married?" Sarah's voice showed her confusion.

"No—you know what I mean."

"Oh." Sarah reddened. "Well, he's wanting companionship, too. I think he gets tired of being alone in his apartment, since we had a taste of living together for those two weeks in the safe house." Her mother seemed to be waiting for her to continue. "Sometimes though, I think he's rather miserable. You know, like he wants more but he's fighting it because he wants us to have a special honeymoon—keep the promise he made when he was in high school to wait. There have been a few times, lately, when he's just kissed me good night at the top of the stairs."

"Well, that will get better in just a few short weeks. And I have to admire a young man for waiting these days—I'm sure he's been tempted a few times. It was a little easier when I was your age, despite the peace and love stuff."

"Well, you weren't exactly a hippie, Mom."

Amanda laughed. "No. But I did have my causes. Still, I hung out with a fairly conservative crowd. In fact, that's one of the things Joe liked about me. I was a 'good girl.' And I wasn't the only one. My friends were too, for the most part. That made it easier." She pulled the Volvo to a stop at the light near Maplewood. Traffic was light despite the early hour. "I'm thinking you seem out of sorts, too. Do you want to talk about it?"

Sarah looked over at her mother. "Oh, well. It's nothing, really."

"Oh, Sweetheart. I know that you're stressed. I'm your mother. What is it? The wedding?"

"No." She looked out the window, watching as a panel truck with a bakery logo approached on the cross street. "I guess I'm just overwhelmed with all the things I'm learning with Leatherneck. And I'm nervous about the depositions."

"I know what you mean about Leatherneck's training. I felt the same way…"

Amanda stopped talking as at the same time they both noticed the car coming along their street from the opposite direction. The light had changed, but knowing that the intersection would be slick in this weather, the truck driver had not bothered to stop at the very yellow light. Not surprised, Amanda had been prepared to wait for the panel truck to continue through before she had pressed the accelerator. Now she still had her foot on the brake as she and Sarah watched the accident unfold before them.

For whatever reason, the oncoming car did not slow down as it approached the intersection, so when the driver finally noticed the truck, it was too late. The car tried to swerve out of the way, but that only put it into a spin, its rear end colliding with the truck. The small sedan skidded back the way it had come and onto the curb. The truck also tried to swerve away at first, but after hitting the curb it jumped the center divider of the wide street, knocking down a sign. Both vehicles came to a standstill.

"I'll get the first aid kit. You call nine-one-one, Sarah."

Only one other car approached the intersection, but as it was on the cross street and unimpeded by the accident, it continued on down the road. Sarah shook her head, wondering at the driver's lack of concern, and then placed the call to emergency services.

With the police on their way, Sarah joined her mother in aiding the victims of the accident. "Mom, let me help the truck driver. You can't climb up there."

Amanda chose not to argue with her daughter about whether she was still able to climb up to a truck cab's door, and instead went to help the driver of the car, who had still not emerged from their vehicle.

Sarah was not prepared for the amount of blood that had already come from the wound on the truck driver's forehead. An image of Matt lying hurt on the grass at the park flitted through Sarah's consciousness, but she focused on the man in front of her.

Dazed, the driver, a middle-aged man, did not respond immediately when Sarah tried to get his attention. Casting about for some kind of compress to stanch the flow of blood, she was forced to settle on the man's muffler, which she pulled from his neck and applied to the wound. He flinched, then leaned back against his seat.

"Just relax, sir. I've already called for help."

"I should have stopped. It's my fault."

"Don't worry about that right now."

Amanda fared better with the driver of the car. She was a young girl, probably not much older than sixteen or seventeen. Amanda could hardly get a word in edgewise with the girl, who had not stopped fretting once she had recovered from the shock of her airbag going off.

"Where's my phone? I was texting my boyfriend. He'll be worried about me." She started looking on the floor of the car.

"Try not to move around. You could have been hurt."

"I feel fine, except for getting smacked in the chest. My friend had a huge bruise from her accident."

Amanda helped the girl from the car, making sure that her jacket was zipped. She pulled up the girl's hood, thankful there was no protest. "Just sit here where I can see you while I go help my daughter."

Amanda knew there was not much she could do, so she hurried over to the truck to check on Sarah. She found some gauze pads in the first aid kit she carried, replacing the muffler with a more suitable bandage.

Sirens signaled the approach of the police. Two squad cars were soon joined by a third. By the time Amanda and Sarah had given their names and a brief report of what they had seen to one of the officers, an ambulance had arrived on the scene as well.

"Well, somehow you managed to keep yourself from getting any blood on you—except for your gloves. I'm sure the men will be worried enough as it is."

"Oh no!" Sarah had pulled out her phone, holding it gingerly with her clean hand. "Matt's been trying to get a hold of me. He must be worried sick." She touched the screen and voice activated the call.

He answered immediately. "Sarah! Where are you?"

"We were delayed by an accident a few blocks away. We'll be there in a minute."

"An accident? Are you hurt? We're in the car now, leaving the driveway."

"Oh no. We're fine. We _saw_ an accident. Please just wait there. We're turning onto Maplewood now. I'll see you in a minute."

His sigh of relief was audible over the phone. "Okay. I'm glad you and your mom are alright."

Sarah put the phone away after they ended the call. "I take it you heard all of that."

"Oh my. Look. Your father and Matt were getting ready to come looking for us." Amanda pointed her chin at the driveway, where Lee and Matt stood waiting. "We should have called. Let's try to get them inside before your father lets loose on us."

Amanda was not able to get out of the car before Lee opened her door for her and started talking. "Amanda. Thank God. You know, we could hear the sirens. You were thirty minutes late. Sarah had texted Matt that there was no traffic and you were on your way. We couldn't help but think the worst."

While her mother soothed her frantic father, Sarah allowed Matt to help her from the car. He walked with her into the house, following her into the laundry room.

"…so I'm really sorry. But once I started helping the man, there was no chance to check my phone." Sarah pulled off her gloves and after examining them, threw them in the trash. She began a thorough hand-washing at the laundry room sink.

Matt leaned up against the washing machine beside her. "I'm just glad the sirens weren't for you. Somehow, I knew that, but your dad was not easily convinced. It was his idea to get in the car and look for the accident. We could tell it was only a few blocks away."

"It seems as if you helped him keep his cool. I noticed that he wasn't yelling." Sarah offered Matt a wry smile.

"I told him I had a gut feeling that you two were fine, just delayed—maybe by the accident." Watching as Sarah pulled a paper towel from the roll above the sink and dried her hands, Matt was thoughtful. Before she could toss the towel in the trash, he drew her into his arms, kissing her on the forehead before he spoke. "Are you okay?"

"Oh, yes. Just a little cold from being out in the weather so long, but it felt good."

He was still thoughtful, hesitant. "That's not what I meant. It looks like that driver bloodied himself up pretty well…"

Then Sarah knew what Matt was concerned about. "You're worried I might have had a flashback, seeing all the blood, weren't you?"

"The thought did cross my mind."

"I started to remember things, but I was concentrating on helping the man."

Matt smiled at her before kissing her again on the forehead and holding her close for several seconds. "That's my girl."

She looked at him hopefully. "Do you suppose I'm over the flashbacks?"

"I'd like to think so." He grew serious again. "Hey. I know you were upset earlier. I wanted to pray with you, but it wasn't a good time. I was disappointed that we didn't get a chance to after work."

"Well, it's still early, sort of. We could pray now."

"I'd like to hear what's bothering you, too."

"Okay. Let's say good night to my parents and go over to the apartment." She led him into the den.

"Oh, there you are. Sarah, we need to tell your dad about the food."

Lee regarded the young couple. "Amanda. Let them go. Sarah looks beat."

His arm around Sarah's shoulders, Matt had felt the tension there as they walked into the room. Now she was relaxing.

Seeing Sarah's expression finally, Amanda realized Lee was right. "Of course."

"Thanks, Lee, for the beer and pizza."

"Anytime, Matt. If I can get you away from Sarah. We'll have to get together again sometime soon. Maybe go get a couple of beers at this place I know."

"And you can tell me more of your stories."

"And I can hear a few of yours." Lee winked at Matt.

"What stories?" Sarah craned her neck to look at Matt's face.

"War stories. You've heard some of it—what isn't classified."

"Oh." She turned back to her parents. "Good night Mom. Thanks for going to the caterer with me—for helping us with the food at the reception. It's going to be really nice—I want you to know I appreciate it."

Matt chimed in. "We both do."

"It's our pleasure, right Lee?"

"Sure. Of course. It's what parents do."

At his words, Amanda's face softened and she stepped over to Lee, putting her arms around his waist.

He looked at her questioningly, and then grew a little bashful when he realized what she was thinking. "Your mother has trained me well."

"Good night, Daddy." Sarah gave her father a quick hug before heading to the door with Matt.

"Night, Pumpkin. Get some sleep."

Amanda chimed in. "Yes, Sweetheart. Your father is right."

Once they were settled next to one another on the couch in the apartment, with Sarah having fresh socks on her feet and an afghan wrapped around her, she finally felt herself relax.

Matt stretched his legs out in front of him, watching her snuggle into the afghan. "You look better already. Did you eat tonight?"

"Yes. I had to. There were so many appetizers and entrees to try. I nibbled a few that I didn't like, but I finished the ones that were good. Definitely made up for my skimpy lunch."

"Good thing you and your mom ordered the cake from that bakery, or you'd have been sampling cake, too."

Sarah giggled. "Yeah. And you wouldn't be able to hold me on your lap anymore."

"Never going to happen. Your idea of pigging out is my idea of a decent meal."

"Did you notice my parents get all mushy when Daddy said he was glad to help out with our wedding?"

Thinking for a moment, Matt stared at the small shelving unit that housed the television and DVD player, empty now of the books and DVDs Sarah had stored there. Those same books and DVDs were now stored in boxes at his apartment, ready to be moved into the townhouse they would share as husband and wife. He and Lee had not talked about Sarah this evening. He wondered if Lee was still struggling to let Sarah go.

He turned back to her and attempted to answer her question. "I guess so."

"People at the Agency never expected him to get married, let alone have kids. And he ended up raising one of his own plus two boys who weren't even his own children. It really was a big leap. Mom said he was pretty self-centered when she first knew him."

"It's not hard for me to believe that he could make the transformation, but I didn't know him then. He's been like a second dad to me."

"Francine says that it's all my mom's doing, but I think Daddy must have been hiding his 'family man' side to the world."

"I can see how your mom could influence someone to bring out the best in themselves. Especially your dad. He's still got it bad when it comes to your mom. I could see that tonight." Matt chose not to dwell on his memories of Lee's state of mind when Amanda had been kidnapped the previous summer.

"Yes. It's pretty neat that my parents are still in love after all these years. Even if is annoying at times when they get all mushy in front of me."

Matt laughed loudly. He had to catch his breath before he could respond. "But it's okay if we're mushy in front of them?"

Sarah drew herself up so her back was now straight. "That's different. We're not really that mushy in front of others. Besides, you don't like to see your parents being all lovey-dovey either."

Matt tried his best to look properly admonished. "You're right. Lauren loves to talk about how great their relationship still is. I can't stand it when she goes on about them going off to the barn by themselves or something."

"Really? The barn?" Sarah's eyes grew wide.

Matt wished he could eat his words. Sarah did not need the mental picture either. He scrambled to cover for himself. "We should be glad we have happily married parents. It bodes well for our relationship."

Saying nothing in response, her eyes took on that shine that he loved. He watched her for a long moment before looking down at his knees. Matt shifted, bending his legs so he could sit up straight on the couch. _Don't get all worked up, Granger. You came here to talk, not make out._ He gave her shoulders a light squeeze. "Now, tell me what's bothering you."

It took Sarah a minute or two to form her words. "Oh, it isn't any one thing. It's just all of the things Leatherneck wants me to do. I'd seen guns before and fired them, I've driven on the track, that sort of thing. But now it's all the time, every day."

Matt was quiet, waiting for her to finish. When Sarah did not say anything more, he ventured, "It probably doesn't help that we have the depositions to worry about."

"How did that go today?"

"Okay. It wasn't fun, but it wasn't as hard as I thought it would be."

"Did they finish? Are you done?"

"No. I have to go back tomorrow."

Sarah wanted to ask more, but something made her hesitate.

Matt reached up and massaged her shoulders as well as he could from his awkward angle. "You're tense again." He pulled her against him, encouraging her to rest her head on his shoulder.

"I just want this all to be over with. The depositions, the wedding planning, my training. I just want us to be married, me working with Jamie…" She stopped, sighing heavily.

"I know what you mean about wanting to be married." Soon he would be out in the cold once again, driving home to his empty apartment, leaving Sarah stressed and on her own. _God, please don't let her have nightmares._ He tried to focus on the rest of her words. "You like working with Jamie, don't you?"

"Yes. And it was fun going out with Grace. I don't mind what little I've seen of surveillance, field work. It's the intensity of the training that's so hard."

"Let's pray."

Sarah's weary tone gave added meaning to her words. "Oh, that would be nice. Thanks." She turned her face to his shoulder and kissed him there.

He smiled at the gesture before closing his eyes and lowering his head.


	6. Chapter 6

The light was bright, far too bright. And she felt smothered, except it was her hearing that was muffled. No. She was underwater. But she felt wrong. Was she sick? She could not move. Then someone was grabbing her roughly, carelessly. It couldn't be Matt. He wouldn't touch her there. And he wouldn't hurt her. Whoever it was had managed to get their arm around her middle and hoist her to her feet. She retched, but nothing came up. Now her captor was dragging her through a door—a door to a garage. It banged heavily against her leg, unlike the interior doors of the townhouse. And they were still not outdoors.

_Oh! I'm in the safe house. And it's Brad. He's taking me away. Yell! Say something! _But waves of nausea were overwhelming her and she could not see very well or hear anything._ Where is Matt? Oh God, please let him be okay. Why can't I seem to fight back?_ Her feet bumped painfully against the concrete steps, her thin slip-ons offering no protection against the rough treatment. Then she was retching again; this time she could taste bile. _No breakfast yet. Nothing there._

Now she was lying in the backseat, the car engine roaring to life as Brad punched the accelerator. The Agency vehicle had been parked with the front of the car facing out of the garage, so she and Matt could make a quick getaway if needed. Now Matt was nowhere to be seen and Brad was taking her away. _Where is Matt? Oh, I'm going to be sick again. Please God, please don't let me be sick. Please help me._

The car fishtailed as it left the driveway and turned onto the street, making Sarah's stomach turn. She started to gag, but nothing came up. An angry voice came from the front seat, but Sarah could not make out the words. She tried to sit up, but the car was moving too quickly and she was too dizzy. _Please help me, God!_

A persistent electronic melody sounded in Sarah's ear. It did not seem to be coming from the car. She tried to say something, but no words would come to her lips. Finally, she opened her eyes. She was no longer in the car, but in her darkened bedroom in the apartment.

"Oh!" Sarah cried out as she sat up suddenly in bed, pulse racing. The dream had been so real. Now that she was awake, painful memories of her deposition came uninvited.

"Certainly you must have given him some reason to think you were interested, Miss Stetson. You said he brought you breakfast. And he came over while you were dressing."

Sarah had been shocked by the prosecuting attorney's questions. It was as if Jacob Klein was implying that Sarah encouraged Brad. She grew defensive. "Surely anyone watching the footage would know that I have a relationship with Matt. I'm engaged to him now. I told Brad that he was out of line, coming by at that hour. And I forced myself to be polite to him. I just wanted him out of the townhouse."

"So you drank some of the shake he brought?"

"I pretended to take a sip."

"You did not swallow any?" _Why are they asking me this? Think! Did you swallow?_ "I might have gotten a little. I was nervous and scared, to be honest."

Greg Peterson nodded, as if he were pleased with her, while Klein had a self-satisfied expression. Brad Smith's attorney seemed tense and upset. Sarah knew that something had been wrong with the smoothie. Now she wondered if it had been drugged. Her father had warned her repeatedly never to take drinks at parties for that reason. _Actually, he told me never to go to parties. Mom told me not to take drinks from strangers. _If she had been drugged, it would have been hard to know. _Unless…maybe a blood test had been ordered._ She had shuddered at the thought during the deposition, and she shuddered again now. _Thank you, God, for helping me get away from Brad._

Her mind returned to the deposition. Now Klein was speaking again. "Miss Stetson, could you please tell us what happened next? Just tell the story—I'll stop you if we need more details."

Sarah retold the events in as much detail as she could remember. She was describing being dragged to her feet when the prosecuting attorney interrupted her again.

"Did Brad Smith touch you, ah, inappropriately, as he pulled you to your feet?"

"Objection! Miss Stetson has not stated that the person was Brad Smith."

"My apologies. Please strike that question. Did anyone touch you inappropriately, Miss Stetson?"

"The person grabbed me roughly, touched me—but it was clumsy…"

"So, he did touch you on the chest?"

"Yes, but it was accidental."

Peterson frowned at the prosecutor, but Klein looked smug. Sarah remembered her palms sweating. Her mother's words echoed in her head. _"When in doubt, be honest. Don't let the attorneys upset you. They'll ask rude, intrusive questions."_ This was certainly intrusive.

Mercifully, Sarah's half-dream ended abruptly. Now she was fully aware of the electronic melody. It was her phone, set to wake her up for work. Reaching over to take the phone, Sarah swiped the screen and shut off the alarm. There was a text from Matt. He was already up, no doubt in the middle of his workout by now.

"Good morning, Beautiful. Only twenty-three more days until we won't have to text our good mornings to each other anymore. I love you."

Her hand shook as she typed her reply, causing her to start several of the words over. "Good morning to you, too, my love. I really needed your text today. Thanks for the wonderful reminder. Love you, too." As she started her morning stretches, she pondered the idea of telling Matt why she needed the text but decided to wait. They had the concert with her parents tonight, and Matt had his own deposition to worry about. While they both had thought the attorneys were done with Matt regarding Brad Smith, he had been summoned once again. _He doesn't need to worry about me and my nightmares. It's all the questions, reliving what happened. Now I'm dreaming it. I hope he isn't having nightmares, too._ She remembered their conversation from the night before.

"It's my fault. I probably gave them reason to question you again." Sarah had been fighting tears. She had vowed to herself that she would not give Matt any details from the deposition, hoping he would understand. It was too hard to talk about. And she did not want to upset him. Better to wait until later. Now she may have made it harder for Matt.

"Oh, Sweetie. This happens. They warned us it would. You had to answer the questions honestly. I'll be okay."

Last night they had not had the luxury of sitting together and talking. Matt's evenings on Maplewood Drive or at their weekly pre-marital counseling sessions had kept him from packing, so they had decided earlier in the day that they would go their separate ways after work. Each of them would spend their Thursday night boxing up as much as they possibly could. The more they packed, the more time they would have to relax on the weekend. Sarah had finished packing up everything except her important papers and the things she would need in the bathroom. Even her food was now in boxes—she could just pull the cereal box out of a carton instead of the cupboard.

Sarah knew that Matt had more to put in cartons, but she would help him with the kitchen things on Sunday. She was going to be the one who set up the kitchen in the new apartment. Even though Matt cooked, too, he was letting her organize the work space. "You're the one who has the most talent in that department."

"Oh, that was diplomatic, Mr. Granger. You know that you're hoping I'll do most of the cooking."

He sounded like he was worried that he had offended her. "But I'll cook, too. I'll help with the laundry and the cleaning. Do shopping…"

"Oh Matt. Stop worrying. I know I'm more of a cook. Besides, I'm no feminist. I may need your help making dinner if I have to work late, but I think it's nice you're letting me be in charge of the kitchen."

"You won't be cooking if I'm home before you. Remember those vows we wrote out? I'm promising to take care of you. That means having dinner ready for you if you've had a long day. But let's face it. You _are_ the better cook. End of discussion."

"And I'm promising to take care of you. So I'll bake muffins."

Matt had laughed then.

Her phone buzzed, bringing her back to the present. She looked at the text. "You okay? I prayed for you."

"I'm okay. Praying for you, too. I'll be helping Jamie this afternoon. Having lunch with him, remember? Is that still okay? Do you need me to have lunch with you?"

Putting the phone down, she got out of bed and prepared for her morning run. It was going to be cold, so after stretching some more, she donned her thick knit cap and her heavy sweatshirt over her long underwear and athletic top, as well as a pair of sweatpants. Grabbing the scarf she used for running, she wound it loosely around her face and neck, tucking the ends down in her jacket. _It's tempting to call Daddy and ask if I can use their elliptical. But I'd probably wake him and Mom up_.

She picked up her phone. Matt had replied to her last text. "I remember. Keep your date. Rene wants to have lunch today. I'll look for you when I'm done with the dep. and let you know how it went."

_At least Rene is looking out for him, too._ Sarah knew that Rene was worried about both of them. She smiled to herself as she tucked the phone in her pocket, mindful of her father's and Matt's admonishments to keep her phone with her at all times. It was Agency policy, but for them it was also a safety precaution after all that had happened that fall. Her thick gloves on her hands, she smiled ruefully as she stepped outside, hoping no one was tracking her GPS this morning. She was not going far in this cold.

In his apartment, Matt was running on his treadmill and watching the television, but his mind was not on the news program. Something had not seemed right about Sarah's texts. Maybe it was a gut feeling. Or maybe he was worrying too much. _You're reading between the lines, Granger_.

The attorneys had grilled Sarah for two days that week. He had driven her home after Wednesday's deposition, but she had insisted upon driving herself back and forth from work on Thursday. "We both need to pack up our apartments or this move is not going to happen."

"We have plenty of time to pack."

"Not this weekend. And next week might be worse than this week."

"You have a point." They had joked around then, but both of them had been worried about Thursday's deposition. He had not pressed Sarah for too many details on Wednesday, but she told him enough to know that the attorneys had just gotten started with her.

Thursday morning he had waited outside the conference room for as long as possible, but he was on the clock that day. A lunch meeting was called about the University of Virginia case, so he was forced to leave. When he returned with sandwiches left over from his meeting, Sarah was still with the attorneys. When they finally broke for lunch, she was given half an hour. Matt spent the time with her, grateful he had something for her to eat. In another conference room nearby, she had been content to sit in a chair pushed up against his, with his arm around her.

He could not sit in the hallway that afternoon, so Matt had gone with his laptop to Phillip's office to work on reports, keeping an eye on the closed circuit camera feed from the hallway outside the conference room so he would know when they had finished the deposition. Phillip had not minded the intrusion, in fact, he had encouraged it when he saw Matt hesitating in his doorway, laptop in hand.

"Sit in here with me, Granger. We can keep an eye on Sarah this way."

"Thanks, Phillip."

He swore under his breath, then looked sheepishly at Matt, as if in apology for his language. "It's bad enough she had to go through what she did. Then to have these bulldogs harassing her about it."

"I know."

The attorneys had finished with their questions by late afternoon. Matt had left his computer in Phillip's office so he could walk Sarah out to her car.

"Are you sure you don't want me to come over tonight?"

Sarah had seemed tempted by the offer. But she was weary. "No. Let's stick to our original plan. I don't have much to pack, but I had better go to bed early tonight so I'll be awake for the concert tomorrow."

Matt had stopped her, searching her face. "I love you. Call me if you need to talk. I'll come right over."

"Thanks, my love. I'll be okay."

He had wondered if she really was okay as she had gotten into her car, waving at him as she drove off. Now something about her texts this morning disturbed him. He stepped off the treadmill and made his way to the bathroom. If he hurried, he might have a chance to talk with Sarah before he met with the attorneys.

SMKSMKSMKSMKSMK

Lee watched Sarah from outside the firing range. The rifle was low caliber, but she continued to fire without changing her position. _She must be pretty accurate with that thing._

When she finally stopped, he knocked on the glass, hoping she would hear him over the other guns that were being fired occasionally nearby. She waved at him, and then turned to gather up the ammunition boxes. Recalling her target from its position twenty-five yards away, she detached it from the pulley system once she could reach it.

She greeted her father as soon as she was out the door. "Hi, Daddy. I didn't expect to see you here today."

Lee reached out to take a few of the boxes from her arms and fell in step beside her as she went to the quartermaster's office. He decided not to tell her that Matt had called him. Stuck in depositions all morning and unable to see Sarah, Matt had been concerned about her. Lee had called Leatherneck, looking for a way to see his daughter without being too obvious. "Well, Leatherneck told me you were going out to the track for a little while this morning. I thought I'd tag along. It's been awhile since I've watched you out there."

"That would be great. I'm having lunch with Jamie, and then helping him out this afternoon, so it won't be for too long."

"That's great. You know I got reservations for Mezza Luna tonight. Your mom pestered me—said you and Matt loved the place."

"Oh, Daddy. It's pretty ritzy. You didn't have to do that."

"Sure I did. I like a good meal, too. Hey, let me see that target."

Leatherneck stepped out of his office when he heard Lee's voice. "Glad to see you made it, Ace. Even you could use a little practice at the track now and then."

"Smart…" Lee cleared his throat and looked guiltily at his daughter as he caught himself. "…mouth. I'm not doing the driving. But I might like to sit in with this sharpshooter here, if she'll let me. Take a look at this target."

Leatherneck whistled low and long. "Very nice, Junior. I think you'll please even James Wong with this marksmanship."

"Well, I'm no sharpshooter. Daddy is being too nice. My scatter isn't very tight."

"Still, you have a lot of bull's eyes—or near misses, anyway."

"I got those at the end. I just had to change my stance a little."

Leatherneck and Lee exchanged glances, but did not say anything as Sarah took the rifle back to the armory.

Once she was out of the room, Leatherneck spoke urgently to Lee. "Wong got a look at her results from the past few weeks. He told Jamie that if she continued to perform like this, he was going to push for Sarah to stay in the field."

"He can't do that. She's already signed on as an analyst. She's got an advanced degree."

"So do some of our operatives. Listen, Lee. He's coming down to talk with her. He may be talking with her right now."

"Why the rush? He's being so damn pushy."

"The next class is small. They need more operatives—at least they need more freshmen who aren't likely to wash out."

"But he knows she's been through hell."

"Come on, Lee. That makes her more attractive as an operative. She survived physically and mentally, and partly due to her own efforts. Kirby's been keeping a close eye on her. He recommended I continue with the simulations next week—I'll be giving her more realistic scenarios."

"You talked with Kirby?"

"I had to. It's in her file that I keep in touch with him."

"So, if Kirby is still monitoring her, why is Wong pushing so hard?"

"You know him. He's a fair man, but he has his quotas. And he's not too fond of shrinks."

Lee smiled ruefully. "Who is?"

In the armory office, Sarah found her attention drifting as James Wong praised her efforts in field training. Approaching the age of forty, the former operative was still fit, his dark hair peppered lightly with gray. Seeing the wedding ring on his finger, she was surprised that she had not remembered that detail about the man from his regular appearances at her father's barbeques. But then she had not talked with many of the male agents on any occasion until she had met Matt. She made an effort to focus on his words.

"Sarah, we never see numbers like this with our freshmen. At least not with the ones who've had no prior experience."

"I appreciate the encouragement, James."

"I only give credit where credit is due."

Watching his face, Sarah did not doubt his words. She knew he was not easy on his agents, but he was not unkind to them either.

"We need you in the field. I'm short now, with Smith gone. And we lost Jimenez."

Sarah knew the two men had worked together. Matt was not one to gossip, but she had heard Rene and Grace inferring that Jimenez had been transferred to an office somewhere in the Midwest. A demotion, really. But Matt had insisted that he was near his family now. Either way, the Agency bullpen was short two agents.

"Well, that was the agreement. Six months in the field."

"We'd like you to consider a year or two."

A knot was forming in Sarah's gut. "But they need help in Analysis. I have the master's degree…"

"I know that. And we do value your education and research background. But you have to understand, you have field background now, too."

_Don't plead. Don't sound desperate. Maybe if I can talk with Jamie, or even Gil Barclay._ "Should I assume Francine and Gil have gone back on our agreement, too?"

"I wish you wouldn't put it that way. Francine and Jamie know. If we can recruit more people, if our freshman class is particularly skilled, you won't be needed as badly. But you know that even with that, we can't keep everyone in the D.C. office. And we'll do our very best not to have you transferred if you stay in the field. We'd want you in the bullpen. Francine put her foot down on that one—although I have to be honest, it is strange to have so many people from the same family working in a single office. It made more sense to transfer you. The New York office is down an agent and you've lived there."

_Oh. So they even talked about transferring me. Maybe I should consider myself lucky I'll be working with Matt—if they don't change their minds. Buck up, Sarah. Maybe there's a way out of this. _"Well, I should be grateful to Francine."

"Yes. She's not interfering much, but she is on your side. We all are. We just need you. I hate to sound corny, but your country needs you, Sarah." He regarded her now impassive expression.

"What about Grant Hill? He's already familiar with the Agency. He is trying to be hired."

"We need more people like Hill. And he is only an intern at this point. But I'm keeping you from the track. Maybe we can talk again next week. I'll see you later."

Sarah was not sure what to say. Thank you was out of the question. "Bye, James."

When Sarah did not return with her purse, Lee and Leatherneck went looking for her. As Leatherneck had predicted, she had stepped into the armory office to talk with James Wong.

Soon the door opened. The men exchanged pleasantries, then Wong excused himself.

Sarah walked into the hallway, her expression neutral. Lee watched her, wondering at the marvel of genetics and the ability of parents to influence their children. His daughter, normally very open and emotional, like Dotty and himself, was now a closed book. _She's clamming up, like Amanda does. Wong must have made her angry._

"You two ready to go?"

"Sarah, what did Wong say?"

"I don't want to talk about it, Daddy. Please don't ask. Let's go to the track. I need to get back to have lunch with Jamie and do a couple of hours of work for him. I don't want to be late for my hair appointment later. Nikki's very popular. I'll never be able to reschedule before the wedding."

_And now she's rambling. She rarely does that._ "Sure. Let's get going." Lee glanced over at Leatherneck, willing him not to say anything.

Lee rode along with Sarah on the track, letting Leatherneck direct her while he listened in on his own headset.

"Okay, Sarah. Let's see a bootlegger's turn."

Sarah punched the accelerator, then applied the brakes and turned as she had been trained.

Lee tensed as the car whipped around. He wondered again why he had volunteered to ride with Sarah. This kind of driving was not easy on his sixty-plus year-old body. And he had no problem understanding why the Agency reserved the older vehicles with heavy duty suspension for these training exercises.

Leatherneck took Sarah through a series of maneuvers on the track, having her swerve at setpoints as if she was directing the vehicle around imaginary vehicles and other obstacles. Despite her skilled manipulation of the car, Lee saw small ways she could improve further. It was a battle to keep his mouth shut, but he managed to sit silently, only offering the occasional compliment. He knew better than to antagonize Sarah with interfering comments when she was upset. _Besides, I'm supposed to be here as moral support, not to criticize._

"Nice move there."

"I was a fraction of a second off, but thanks."

_She does know._ "It's a common problem. If you want, I can show you how to get the timing just right sometime."

"Hey, Stetson. Who's doing the training here?" Leatherneck's teasing tone was easy to pick up over the headphones.

Sarah stopped the car, laughing at the two men. "Let my dad show me. It's probably killing him not to say anything." She got out and went to the passenger side.

"True. Show her your tricks, Scarecrow." At Leatherneck's prompt, Lee exited the car, walking around to the driver's side.

When Sarah seemed enthusiastic about watching her father demonstrate his turns, he executed a few more. Lee found it was easier to be behind the wheel than in the passenger seat, but his daughter needed to keep practicing. They switched seats again and Sarah continued driving.

Soon their time was up. Lee was quick to congratulate his daughter that time. "You learn quickly, Sarah. You'll be fine at Station One."

"I just want to practice a couple more times using those tips you told me."

"Maybe next week—if you can drag your dad down here, I'll let him ride with you again."

"Sure. Now let's get Sarah back to work. You and I can go to Ned's for lunch. I need to settle my nerves with a beer." Lee winked at his daughter and she laughed.

Seeing Jamie at the Agency brought back Sarah's memories of her conversation with James Wong. She did not say anything until she was seated at the deli with her brother.

"I suppose you know that James Wong talked to me today. Francine had to convince him not to send me to New York. And he doesn't want me to work in Analysis."

"Sarah, all of that about Analysis hasn't been decided for certain. And even if you did stay in the field, it wouldn't have to be long term." He looked down at his plate, then off at a point on the wall. "You're getting married. At some point you may want to start a family…"

"Oh, so I'd have to have a baby to get out of the field?" Sarah had to force herself to keep her voice down.

"I didn't say that."

"But that's what you meant." She looked down at her food. Suddenly the chicken salad wrap that had sounded so appetizing no longer held any appeal. "So, how are the boys?"

Jamie had not missed Sarah's expression. "I'm sorry, Sarah. This might be our last lunch together in a long time, and all I've done is make you feel worse."

"It's okay."

"No, it's not."

"Matt and I want to have kids. But we want to have fun—be carefree—for a while first. We haven't even known each other for a full year."

"Of course. Listen, Sarah. We don't know how things will shake out. Just hang in there. Maybe you'll be part of a really hotshot class."

"I'll be praying for that." Thinking about work was not only taking away Sarah's appetite, it was beginning to make her nauseous. She made a feeble attempt to change the subject. "Now, tell me about the boys."

The siblings kept their conversation light for the rest of the meal. Back at the Agency, Sarah got down to business when she joined Jamie and his mixed team of analysts and agents who were sifting through information on the University of Virginia terrorist recruitment case. She focused her attention on the work and kept an eye on her phone, waiting for Matt to join them.

At three o'clock, she sent him a text and gathered her things reluctantly. She would have to leave before they had a chance to talk about his deposition—or her conversation with James Wong.

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Sarah heard the rumble of Matt's engine as he pulled to the curb. Having just returned from her hair appointment, she was in a rush to get upstairs and change her clothes. Her stomach was sour and she was feeling a little wobbly from having eaten little all day, the stress of rushing from one thing to the other, and the conversation with James Wong. Now, she needed to dress in her semi-formal clothes for dinner and the Christmas Pops Concert.

Struggling with the box in her trunk, she offered Matt a quick hello over her shoulder as he walked up behind her.

"Hey, Sweetie. Let me get that." He was holding two bouquets of red roses, white chrysanthemums, evergreen branches, and holly—one for Sarah and one for Amanda—and offered her a quick glance as he walked up to the Volvo.

She moved away from her car. Matt handed her the flowers, then stopped and took a longer look at her before retrieving the carton from the trunk. "Wow. You look gorgeous." Balancing the box with one arm, he reached out to finger her hair, which curled softly over her shoulders and down her back. "Your hair is…different. I really like it this way."

Smiling slightly, Sarah blushed. Nikki, her stylist, always fussed over her hair, using special conditioner, curling irons—she seemed to enjoy making it look like Sarah was ready for a photoshoot. For once Sarah was glad. "Thanks. Nikki always gives me a 'do' of some sort when I get it cut. She experimented with a couple of ideas for the wedding, too. That's why I'm running late."

"Whatever she did, it's really nice." He touched her hair again before closing her trunk.

"You look very nice, too. I love that suit."

Matt was dressed in her favorite blue suit. He'd worn it on special dates. The wool was a fine weave, and it was tailored perfectly. Sarah had complimented him on it each time he wore it, but she always kept her comments low key, knowing that he did not enjoy flattery. _Someday I'm going to tell him how hot he looks in it._ She smiled to herself.

Relieved that she did not have to hoist the box again, Sarah carefully shifted the flowers to one hand and flipped her purse, which had fallen down her arm, back onto her shoulder. It was heavier now that she had qualified for her concealed weapon permit. Lee had insisted she bring one of his Glocks with her until she became a full agent and would be able to carry her Agency-issued Glock full-time. It did not help that he had slipped that extra magazine in her purse last night.

"A good agent always has at least one extra mag."

"Yes, Chief."

Sarah had not missed the suppressed grin on her father's face. "A few months ago I would have given you grief for being sassy with me. Now I kind of like it when you call me that. You've come a long way, Pumpkin."

"I guess I'll always be Pumpkin."

"You know it." He ran his hand over her hair before resting his hand on her back and walking her out of his den. "I almost wish I could have been the section chief when you started." He sighed. "But that would have caused you no end of trouble with the other agents and your superiors."

"And I would have been the one in the van on every op. Face it, Daddy, you've even told _me_ to 'stay in the car.'"

"That was only while I was assessing the situation."

"At track meets, school events—"

"—Crowded places where some creep may have seen the name Stetson on a list." Lee stopped her and raised his eyebrows as he looked in her face.

Sarah had been forced to acknowledge his point. He had been watching out for her, leery of any old enemies that might want to threaten his daughter to get to him.

"Earth to Sarah." Forcing herself back to the present, Sarah realized that Matt was standing in front of her, the box in his arms, an expectant look on his face.

"Oh, sorry. I know. I should be hurrying."

"So, where do you want the box? Upstairs or in my car? It looks like shampoo. A lot of shampoo."

Laughing, Sarah finally realized that she had missed Matt's original question. "Um, that's a wedding present for us. I guess it should just go to your apartment."

"Shampoo? A wedding present?" Wearing a bemused expression, Matt turned toward his car.

Catching up with him, Sarah sought to explain. "Nikki has been cutting my hair since high school—she gave it to us. It's shampoo, but there's also conditioner in there."

"Um, I don't need fancy shampoo. And I've never used conditioner." Resting the box on the bumper, Matt reached in his pocket for his car door opener.

"It's not for you. It's for me. But it's for you, too."

With an effort, Matt stopped himself from rolling his eyes. "I'm confused."

With her free hand, Sarah reached into the unsealed box before Matt could get the trunk unlocked. Popping open one of the bottles with her thumb, she held it up to her fiancé's nose and commanded, "Smell."

After sniffing at the bottle, realization dawned on Matt's face. A silly grin spread across his features. "What? Did you tell her?"

Sarah did not look up at Matt as she snapped the cap closed and slipped the bottle back into the box. "Um, yes. I was going to buy a bottle, and she told me they were taking it off the market. Then, when I was disappointed, Nikki wanted to know why. After I told her that you really like the fragrance, she went in the back and brought out the rest of their inventory and called it a gift. They were going to put it on clearance."

"I guess I should write the thank you note for this." Matt chuckled. "I owe Nikki big time."

"I'm pretty sure Nikki would love to have you deliver your note in person. I only go in there once every few months, so she didn't know about us. When I showed her your photo on my phone, she nearly passed out."

"Oh, please." Rolling his eyes this time, Matt closed the trunk lid, locked the car, and pocketed the opener. He took one of the bouquets and placed his hand on Sarah's back as they went back up the driveway.

Sarah leaned conspiratorially towards Matt. "She said you were hot. I won't say what she said about you liking the scent of my hair, but let's just say I blushed bright red."

"I don't think I want to know." Matt looked uncomfortable. "You talked about us with her?"

"Oh no. In fact, I'd feel badly about telling her our little secret, but since I've got a couple of years' worth of bottles in that box, I'm kind of glad I did." Sarah could see Matt was obviously relieved. "Don't worry, Matt. I'm not one of those silly girls who brag about what they do with their boyfriends."

"I didn't really think so." As they walked into the apartment, Matt glanced over at the wall clock. His hello kiss was just a quick one. "I hate to rush you Sarah, but your parents will be waiting for us soon."

She glanced down at the flowers. "_Two _bouquets for me?" She grinned mischievously. "Thank you. They are just beautiful."

"Yep, two bouquets. Because you're that special. And it's my pleasure." He grinned back at her and reached for the bouquet in her hand. "I'll take those. I can put yours in water while you get dressed." He laid Amanda's bouquet on the table.

"Thank you for the beautiful flowers—they are very nice. You didn't have to do that." She reached up to kiss his cheek.

"Yes, I did. I haven't given you flowers in a while and it's a special occasion. Something beautiful for my beautiful fiancée."

"And you are very sweet. I'll be ready in just a few minutes." She ducked into the bathroom, leaving the door open. After wiping off her old makeup, she reached in the drawer, rifling around for her eye shadow. She called out to Matt. "How did your deposition go today?"

He came to the doorway. "It was okay. They tried to get me to say something incriminating about my attitude towards Brad. Thankfully all I did that day he really flirted with you was act like an angry rooster." Matt avoided bringing up the tiff he and Sarah had had after that encounter. He had purposefully come out of his room with his shirt off, making sure that Brad knew he was in Matt's territory, messing with "his woman." And he had let Sarah know he was jealous by criticizing the way she had handled Brad's flirtations. He had felt foolish about it until he found out that Brad was a serious threat. "Then the day he took you, he got me with the second flashbang before I could fire off any rounds at him. His attorney was quiet then."

Sarah looked at Matt's face in the mirror, but did not say anything. She did not like to admit how much anger she still had towards Brad Smith. She tried to control the shaking in her hand as she applied powder to her cheeks.

Matt did not miss the look in Sarah's eyes. He had seen it before when they had discussed Brad Smith with Dr. Kirby, the Agency psychiatrist, then in a roundabout way with their pastor. Even though they could not discuss specifics about the case or even let their pastor know they were in intelligence work, it had frustrated Matt that they could not have normal pre-marital counseling sessions when they had first gone to Pastor Carlson. "I wouldn't have minded getting a few rounds in the jerk, but now that I'm talking with the attorneys, I guess I'm glad I didn't do anything to him."

"Like choke him and cause an accident?" Sarah put the makeup back in the drawer, then shut it more forcefully than she intended.

Matt stepped inside the bathroom and put his hand on her shoulder. "You did a great job defending yourself. No one questions that. The attorneys just gave you a hard time so they could try to get the judge to cut the slimeball some slack. Besides, he had hurt you." Matt closed his eyes, his mouth a flat line.

"I'm not absolutely sure it was Brad who hit me."

"It's the most likely scenario. And it wasn't just the hitting. It was the flashbangs. Two of them—one is bad enough." He cleared his throat and looked at her in the mirror, his eyes intently upon her. "I heard that Wong came looking for you today. He's pretty determined to keep you in the field for a while."

"Yes."

"I won't ruin our evening by making a big deal out of it, but I think you should know I gave him a piece of my mind."

"Oh."

"And I'm determined not to worry about it. Jamie is going to keep track of the work you do with him and talk to Gil Barclay at some point."

"Make his case?"

"Yeah, I guess. My point is that we should not worry about it." Matt put his arms around Sarah from behind and kissed her hair. "Let's try to think about something besides work tonight. It will be fun to eat with your parents at Mezza Luna."

She reached up to rest her hands on his arms. "Yes, it will. But not if I'm dressed like this." Her tone was more lighthearted now.

Matt released her and stepped backward out of the little room. "I'm getting out of your way."

"I'll be out in a few." Sarah hurried into her bedroom and shut the door, while Matt went back to the kitchen and finished placing her flowers in water.

A few minutes later a low whistle was escaping his lips as walked into the living room with the vase. He stared openly at Sarah before setting the flowers on the coffee table. "You look stunning."

Dressed in simple black high heels, Sarah had chosen a dark blue silk dress with three-quarter length sleeves. The cut of the dress hugged her body, the skirt ending just above her knee. Other than a pattern of sequins on the bodice, there were no adornments on the dress, and she wore a simple necklace, emphasizing the dress's square neckline. Her hair still hung in soft waves over her shoulders, and she had tucked it behind her ear on one side to reveal one of the diamond and sapphire earrings Matt had given her last September. She blushed at Matt's compliment. "I hope you don't mind if we kind of match. I really liked this dress—Mom picked it out when we were shopping for bridesmaids' dresses and said to consider it an early Christmas present."

Finally coming to her side, Matt ran his hand down her arm before reaching up to caress her face. His eyes were dark, but he was trying to keep his voice light. "I don't mind matching. Makes it seem more like we belong together." He leaned toward her, giving her a lingering kiss before finally pulling away. He took a deep breath. "Where is your coat?"

Sarah produced the coat from her closet and soon they were making their way over to the house to join Lee and Amanda.


	7. Chapter 7

Sarah chewed her bread automatically, knowing that she needed to ease the sour feeling in her stomach or more than one person at the table would comment on her lack of appetite. Matt knew she loved the food at Mezza Luna, and her mother was sure to be concerned. _And Daddy seemed to be hovering today_. Her mother had been very chummy as they walked into the restaurant, wrapping her arm around her daughter's waist affectionately. _She and Daddy must be worried about me again._ _He must have known why I was talking with James Wong._

While they were ordering their food, Matt reached for her free hand under the table and squeezed it. When she glanced at him, he shot her a questioning expression. She squeezed his hand back in reassurance.

When their salads arrived, Sarah was able to eat, and by the time the entrees were served, she had grown quite hungry. While the others chatted freely, Sarah spent most of the meal listening and trying not to think about the depositions, James Wong, and driving like Daisy Duke of Hazzard County.

"…I don't think Sarah was fully there when we were driving today, either."

Sarah looked up to see her father gazing at her with an amused expression on his face. She blushed furiously. "Um…"

Matt shifted in his chair, leaning towards Sarah. "Your mom asked if you were ready for the shower tomorrow."

"Yes, of course. I guess so." Her stomach tightened. _I need some fresh air._ "Would you excuse me for a minute?"

Sarah knew her parents were watching her as she made her way to the restrooms, and she willed Matt to stay in his seat. He did…for ten seconds. But Amanda put her hand on his arm, and he sat back down. It was her mother who followed her to the restroom.

From her stall, she could hear Amanda open her purse and freshen up her makeup, chatting with another woman about the food. _Oh, I don't want to talk with anyone. I just want to have fun tonight._

The restroom was empty now. "Sarah. You can't hide in there forever."

"Please just leave me alone, Mom."

"We need to talk—or you need a hug. I'm not sure which."

"Try both." _Oh, no. If I cry, my makeup will be ruined._ Sarah stepped out of the stall and went to wash her hands. Another woman came in, heading straight to a stall.

Amanda drew her daughter into an embrace as soon as the paper towel was in the trash. "I know it's been a hard week, Sweetheart. You can't bottle it all in."

"I don't have much choice. Some things can't be helped, other things I just have to get over."

"True. Your father and I were hoping you could relax this evening. Are you feeling okay? You didn't look well when we sat down at the table."

"I'm okay now. I didn't eat much today. I guess I kind of pigged out at dinner."

"Matt was amused."

"He still thinks I don't eat enough."

"Your father does that to me." They laughed together. "I know we can't talk here, but I can tell you that if you let your mind focus on just this evening, you'll relax some. In your job, you'll have to learn to compartmentalize more. Lose yourself in the music tonight, Sweetheart." Suddenly Amanda brightened. "Don't forget that your dress came today. We can do a fitting tomorrow before the shower. I can't wait to see it on you."

Smiling now, Sarah replied, "I can't either." She started to move towards the door of the restroom. "Thanks, Mom."

"I didn't do anything."

"Sure you did." Her expression more relaxed now, Sarah smiled at Amanda as they walked back to the table, where two relieved-looking men sat watching for them.

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Right on schedule, Matt arrived at Jennifer and Jamie's house. Amy had the door open before he could reach it.

"Prompt as usual, Mr. Granger."

"Hey, Amy. How did it go?" He waved to Jennifer and Amanda, who were busy in the kitchen.

"She's got quite a load of booty. It looks like a department store in here. Good thing you did the driving. Some of the stuff is heavy."

Matt chuckled. "We're going to need to get a three-bedroom apartment, not a two."

Amy's eyes twinkled. "Maybe. Sarah's in the living room."

As Matt walked in from the foyer, he spotted Sarah chatting with a small group of women, some of whom he did not recognize. His partner's wife, Patti Enriquez, and his fellow agent, Grace Tanaka, had greeted him as they passed on the walk outside, and he had seen Cheryl and another woman from church driving away as he parked his car.

Sarah gave him a little wave, beckoning him to join her. While the two friends from dance class, Tori and Christina, greeted him with familiarity, he had not met the three other women. Out of politeness, he tried to ignore their blushing faces as Sarah introduced him to the women one by one. Nikki the hair stylist was among them. Perhaps thirty, she had dyed her hair an unnatural shade of red. A small diamond sparkled in her nose and a tattoo peeked out from under the neckline of her shirt. She was naturally good looking to the point of being quite attractive when she smiled, and she had the air of confidence of a woman who had received many compliments. She stared openly at Matt.

Soon most of the women excused themselves and after thanking Jennifer and Amy, the hostesses, left. Nikki went down the hall to the restroom.

Matt leaned toward Sarah as she watched them leave. He whispered in her ear. "I know who Nikki, Christina, and Tori are, but who were the other two ladies?"

"Some of my old roommates from Georgetown. They'd love hearing you call them ladies."

Matt did not fail to register the gentle sarcasm. "Sorry. Women."

"Oh, don't change for them, Mr. Granger. I like your Texas manners. Besides, you're a fifteen on a scale of one to ten. They were used to that other guy. He was something like a six or a seven, on a good day."

Sarah blushed and Matt turned quickly around. Nikki had walked up behind them while they were talking.

Ignoring their embarrassed reactions, Nikki continued. "It was great to meet you. Maybe you'll let me have a go at your hair someday. It's nice in an ex-military way, but…"

Matt could tell that Nikki had an eye for style, but he was fairly certain it would not be _his_ idea of style.

Laughing a little, Sarah attempted to sound genuine. "Matt's been going to barbers for years. If he changes his mind, we'll let you know. Thanks so much for coming today, Nikki."

Grateful for the rescue, Matt did not attempt to correct Sarah. While he sometimes stopped in at the barber for a trim, he was just as content to go to an inexpensive salon at the mall.

After Nikki left, Sarah began going through the gifts with Matt, trying to keep them organized as they prepared to take them to the car.

"You're starting to think like a field agent."

"Oh? How so?"

"You knew just what to say to get Nikki off my case."

"Well, it worked, right? I guess it comes from living with field agents. And I didn't really lie."

Matt regarded Sarah for a moment. He decided it was best to let the matter go. He liked his hair the way it was, and he was pretty sure Sarah did, too. He was also fairly certain Sarah was not happy that Nikki was flirting with him. He knew for sure that he was not enjoying her attention. Picking up his stack of boxes, he made his way out to the Charger.

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Staring out of the window, Sarah clenched her fists in her lap. Aware of her parents in the front seat of her father's BMW sedan, she was also conscious of the fact that at the moment, it was as if she was back in high school. But as she twisted the engagement ring on her left hand, she knew that her father would not be dropping her off at school—her parents were going with her to the Agency. In a few hours she would be forced to recall in great detail that day when she had almost lost the man who would later give her that ring. She would not be at the mercy of the ruthless Mexican cartel members who would soon be on trial, but she would be at the mercy of their attorneys. And she knew the prosecutor would not be easy on her either. His associate had proven that the previous week when she had been grilled about Brad Smith.

It was Amanda who broke the silence. "The attorneys don't plan to talk with us for very long, Sarah. I guess they just want a preliminary statement. You should wait nearby."

"Jamie had some things for me to do." Sarah wished she could be back at Matt's apartment, where they had spent the afternoon before, packing up his kitchen, leaving only the pantry untouched. With just the food, clothing, and linens to be packed up, Matt was nearly ready to move. Rene was coming over later in the week to help him dismantle the weight machine.

It had not taken them long to pack, so they had gone for a walk in the greenbelt near the apartment complex, enjoying the brief warm spell. It had already begun to grow cold once again. Sarah rewrapped the scarf around her neck.

"Do you want more heat back there, Sarah?"

"No thanks. It will just make it colder when we get out." She noticed that her father had not used his pet name for her. _He's worried about me. He thinks I'm going to fall apart. Maybe I will._ Sarah sighed quietly.

Lee did not fail to hear her. "Listen, Sarah. This won't be any worse than it was last week. They can't hurt you, they can't hurt Matt. But you can do your best to think clearly. Just tell the truth."

"What if I mess up? What if they do show up?"

"Greg Peterson assured me that they won't be there. He's betting that Santiago and Jimenez's attorneys are worried that their presence will trigger more memories—not intimidate you into messing up. It will only get worse for them if the judge determines from your testimony that you went through personal trauma. Tell the truth and be yourself. Don't worry. If Matt can't be there when you get out, your mom and I will be."

Amanda chimed in. "I'm so thankful that this is a joint deposition. It's time all of this came to a close. It's Christmas."

Sarah watched as her father took her mother's hand. He glanced sideways at her. While their exchange was silent, Sarah knew they were worried about her. And no, it was not fair that they had to go through this at Christmas, and so close to the wedding. But it would all be over soon. She unclenched her hands, stretching out her fingers, and looked down at her lap as her father drove through the security gate for the Agency's underground garage.

Matt came to see Sarah while she waited in Jamie's office, using the time, ostensibly, to check background information on some of the contacts from Matt's and Rene's case. He sat down and worked on one of Jamie's computers nearby while Sarah waited to be summoned to the conference room.

"Aren't you supposed to be writing your reports, Granger?"

"What's it to you, King? I'm helping you out, here."

"Operatives only work on analysis when under duress from their section chief."

Matt did not miss the twinkle in Jamie's eyes. He remained in his seat at the computer. It was grunt work, something relegated to the freshman agents, and Matt was no longer at that level. But he knew Jamie did not mind the extra help, especially since Sarah was distracted by her nervousness over the upcoming deposition.

Sarah's voice was so quiet when she spoke that Jamie and Matt almost asked her to repeat herself. "I know Brad Smith did not come to his deposition because of the special circumstances surrounding his case. But I can't get over the feeling that I'm going to walk in, and the Jimenez brothers will be there."

Sober now, Jamie held up a hand to Matt so he could answer. "They probably won't be. But if they are, you'll be strong. I know it, Sarah. These two men had evil intentions. This is your chance to make sure the court will know what really happened that day."

She glanced at her brother and then at the floor. "But I can't remember all of it."

"You remember enough."

Matt joined in. "And I can help fill in the blanks. So can your dad and mom."

"I was hoping they might stop by here before they left."

"Speak of the devil." Jamie grinned at Amanda and Lee as they stepped into the now-crowded office. Amanda rested her hand on Sarah's shoulder.

Lee tried to keep his tone light. "Looks like a family get-together in here. Where's Phillip?"

"Oh, he had work to do." Jamie smiled weakly at his parents, then glanced at Sarah. She clearly was not joining in the jesting.

"Yeah, well some of us aren't too grateful for help." Matt chuckled self-consciously, then grew serious. "How did it go?"

Amanda was nonchalant. "Oh, routine questions. The usual."

"Really? They didn't grill Daddy about shooting Santiago?"

"Well, they did ask me several questions, but they let me tell my version of things. They'll do the same for you, Sarah." She noted that again, he had not used her nickname.

Sarah's phone buzzed. "It's Greg Peterson." She took the call, then grabbed her purse. "Thanks for letting me pretend to work in here while I waited, Jamie."

"Love you, Sis." Jamie stopped Sarah long enough to give her a quick hug.

She smiled at him. "Thanks. Love you, too."

"You'll be fine, Pumpkin." Lee gave Sarah's shoulder a squeeze as she passed him.

That gesture and the use of her nickname caused a wave of relief to wash over her. _I can do this._

"I'm walking over there with you." Matt pulled his suit jacket from the back of the chair where he had been seated and hurriedly stuck his arms in the sleeves, joining Sarah in the hall.

"Do you really think she'll be okay, Mom? Lee?"

"We need to hope that she'll be fine, Jamie." Amanda was stared down the hall after her daughter. "And maybe do some of that praying that Matt and Sarah like to do."

SMKSMKSMKSMKSMK

The room was stuffy. Nervous that she might become flustered and say the wrong thing, Sarah tried to keep her eyes on a focal point or on the attorneys as they questioned her. For the last two hours the prosecuting attorney had grilled Sarah on the various encounters she had had with the Jimenez brothers and their fellow cartel members. She could feel the eyes of the Jimenez's attorneys boring into her as she described the details of the chase that had led to the first arrest in the case.

Her stomach was in knots and she put all of her effort into appearing calm and collected. Peterson had coached her to keep her cool during the depositions, and her father and mother had been lecturing her about not showing her feelings while under duress. She imagined the Agency attorney to be in his mid- to late fifties. His hair was grey at the temples, and he looked like many of the other men she often encountered in Washington. He wore a dark suit, a blue tie, and a white dress shirt. He could have been mistaken for a lobbyist or perhaps even a politician.

The prosecutor, Stephen Willis, and the defense attorneys were equally professional in their appearance and about ten years younger than Greg Peterson. One of the members of the defense team sat back in her seat, quietly observing, while his partner sat tensely, ready to speak into his mic at any moment.

"So, you deliberately forced your pursuer's vehicle off the road?"

"Yes."

"You could have caused an accident. It endangered lives, did it not?"

Sarah found it annoying that Willis's style was to seemingly back his witnesses into a corner, only to have them say exactly what he wanted. _This is so stressful._ "It may have endangered the lives of myself, my passenger, and the other driver, but they began the chase. They sideswiped me."

"And you know for certain they were chasing you? The sideswiping was not an accident?"

"They showed up in the middle of a service at a small church they had never attended. They ran after me into the parking lot, and they followed closely behind me on a circuitous route. I was trained by the Agency to be aware of these kinds of situations arising. I simply did what I'd been told to do for my own safety, and the safety of my passenger."

"Trained by the Agency. Would you elaborate? You were not employed here at the time."

"As a family member of Agency employees, I have always been at risk for abductions or attacks. I was first trained in defensive techniques as a young teenager. Then, when I learned to drive, I was taught evasion techniques and defensive driving. I took a refresher in college a few years ago."

Stephen Willis leaned into the microphone on the table in front of him, glancing over briefly at one of the cameras also recording the deposition. "Let the record show that the prosecution has submitted evidence of the aforementioned training. Let the record also show that the prosecution has submitted details of the aforementioned training, including information on the techniques the victim used during the chase."

"Objection." One of the defense attorneys leaned forward. Sarah struggled to remember his name. _Saltillo?_ "Miss Stetson was not necessarily a victim at this point."

Willis leaned back in his seat, directing his stony gaze at the defense attorney. "Saltillo, I warned you. Don't mess with us on this one, or it will get back to the judge. When a defendant is accused of endangering and harassing others, including the witness being questioned, it is acceptable to call the witness a victim."

Willis leaned forward once again. "Would these defensive maneuvers include forcing a car off the road?"

"Yes, if it was the only way to stop the chase."

"A chase that lasted well over fifteen minutes?"

"Objection! The attorney is leading the witness." Saltillo glared at Willis.

"How long did the chase last, Miss Stetson? Please repeat the answer you gave us earlier." Willis did not keep the annoyance out of his voice.

"Over fifteen minutes. I'm not exactly sure. But I do know we left the church at 10:15. I glanced at the clock just before we had to leave. It was past 10:30 when we finally stopped. I saw the time on my phone."

"Were you able to exit your vehicle once your car had stopped?"

"Yes."

"Through the driver's door?"

"No. It was jammed shut. I had to crawl across the seats."

"Let the record show that the prosecution has submitted photographs of the damaged car. Let the record also show that the aforementioned vehicle, a 2005 Toyota Corolla, was considered a total loss by the insurance company."

Saltillo was quick to disrupt the deposition once again. "Objection. The assessment was not conducted until after the car had been sold."

"Let the record show that although the car was towed from the premises, the title was not signed over until after the assessment."

Sarah was glad for the break while the attorneys haggled over details. Greg Peterson took the opportunity to reach over and pat her arm in reassurance. She knew Saltillo, who appeared to be the only defense attorney with a voice, was about to have his turn with her. She wondered vaguely at the quiet female attorney.

SMKSMKSMKSMKSMKSMK

Matt did not go back to Jamie's office, but instead went back to the bullpen and his desk. He was working on the reports that Francine had ordered when Rene poked him. "Granger, check it out. It's the two agents from Mexico City."

Matt looked up in time to see Julia Garcia and Carlos Mendez weaving their way through the desks towards Matt. He stood up as they approached, greeting them and introducing them to his partner.

"You probably are wondering why we are here."

"I would assume for the depositions."

"Could we go to a conference room?"

"Sure." With Rene tagging along, uninvited but curious, Matt led the way to a nearby conference room just vacated by James Wong and two of his new freshman agents, there for orientation.

Mendez waited for everyone to be seated before he began. "Listen, you probably know we're here for the depositions."

"Sure. I'm sorry you have to go through that." Matt directed his remark to Julia. "I know it's probably unpleasant having to talk about what happened."

Julia surprised Matt with her response. "Oh no. I'm glad to have the chance to make sure this b-, excuse me, jerk, rots in jail. It was bad enough what he did to me." She let her voice die there, when Carlos, who had been watching Matt, put his hand on her arm.

When Matt had walked Sarah to the deposition, he had glanced in the room. It was just large enough for the four attorneys and one witness, as well as the stenographer and a clerk. Now he imagined Sarah sitting in the relatively small room, not far from the cartel attorneys, answering their questions. He said a quick, silent prayer for her.

Mendez spoke quietly, trying to soothe both Julia and Matt. "We wondered if you knew anything about the two defense attorneys. I have heard some rumors about the woman. Teresa Sandoval."

"The name doesn't sound familiar."

"But it does to me." Rene leaned forward. "She's a hotshot lawyer who has defended baddies before. A friend in Homeland told me a story about her. One of his buddies, a border patrol agent, was shot by cartel members. She defended the sleazeballs."

Matt regarded his partner. There was much more to the story, but he was hesitating. "Tell us the whole story, Enriquez. I always know when you're holding back."

"She plays hard ball. Likes to push the agents into a corner. She tries for any angle that may look like the perp was provoked."

Attempting to remain calmly in his chair, Matt failed miserably. He got up and began pacing.

"Hey, Granger. She's got Peterson in there to help her. She didn't do anything wrong."

"I was just thinking of the emotional fallout. He can only do so much."

"Perhaps if we can warn her to be careful. I'm surprised Peterson did not brief us." Mendez was grave, watching Matt with a sympathetic eye. He was well aware of the part Matt had played in the case as well. Since he had killed one of the cartel members, even if it was in self-defense after being brutally stabbed himself, Sandoval was sure to go after him.

"I was hoping they'd take a lunch break. Do you suppose he just found out about the attorney?"

"That's the likely answer. She was hired rather recently. Saltillo did the legwork. She's there for the show." Julia Garcia spoke quietly, but both Rene and Matt could detect the edge in her voice that came with being a seasoned operative.

Matt thought idly that he hoped Sarah would never develop that edge. It was the sweetness of her personality, somehow preserved over the years despite her parents' occupations, that had attracted him to her in the first place. _But if Sarah is forced to spend time in the field, it may come._

Distracted by his own musings, Matt had missed part of the conversation.

"...we should probably get some sandwiches and be ready for them to break." Rene was watching Matt, concern on his face.

"Sure."

As if on cue, Matt's phone buzzed. He checked the screen. "Speak of the devil. Peterson knows you're here already. Wants us to meet in a conference room on that level. He's ordering sandwiches—having his assistant bring them to us. He'll text us."

"When?" Mendez leaned forward in his seat.

"Maybe in a half an hour."

Just then Francine's assistant Narelle knocked on the door. "You folks just about done in here? We have a scheduled meeting in five minutes. I need to make coffee." She hesitated in the doorway.

"Go ahead, Narelle." Rene waved her in towards the empty coffeepot.

"We should go. This conference room is popular."

An hour later, Matt's hand was resting on Sarah's back, guiding her to the conference room Greg Peterson had set aside for their lunch. He could tell she was weary. When she had emerged from the room, her eyes showed signs of strain. The muscles in her back, where he had placed his hand, were tight.

Peterson wasted no time repeating the same information Rene had related earlier. While his partner had not been invited to the meeting, Matt grimly thought that for once Rene would not be satisfied he was right.

"…So, Willis will be bringing in one of his associates, Carla Simpson. She will be there to help me deflect this second attorney's attempts to goad the Agency witnesses."

The remainder of the lunch meeting was spent with Matt and the other agents asking questions, while Sarah silently attempted to eat. After several bites she put down her sandwich and sat back in her chair. Her stomach was still in knots—the food would no longer go down. She sipped her water, willing herself to relax as she let the others do the talking. Finally she could take no more. She got up from her chair, interrupting their conversation as she tried to squeeze behind their chairs and out of the room. "Excuse me."

Matt started to get up and follow Sarah, but she put a hand on his shoulder, and then whispered in his ear. "I'm okay. Just going to the restroom."

As she emerged from the stall, Sarah was relieved to find the room was still empty. With no one else about, she finally felt herself relax a little. The food in her stomach no longer threatened to come up. She held a wet paper towel to the back of her neck for a minute. Finally, she could delay no longer. It was time to go back to the deposition room.

Matt waited outside the restroom. "You okay, Sweetie?"

Sarah glanced up the hall at the attorneys, who were slowly moving into the conference room. "I guess as okay as I can be."

Matt grasped her arms. "I love you. I'm praying for you. Just remember, no matter what they talk about it in there, it's still all in the past. I'm okay, and you're okay. He's watching over you, Sparrow." His eyes were intent upon her face, trying to read her thoughts.

A smile flitted across Sarah's face as she looked up at Matt. "Thank you. I love you, too, Eagle."

Somewhat relieved, he walked her to the conference room, and then watched as she walked in and the clerk closed the door.

The two agents from Mexico City had left the Agency after the lunch meeting. Back in the bullpen, Matt tried to concentrate on his reports, but finally he gave up and went to Jamie's office, where he could use a monitor to bring up the closed circuit camera outside the conference room where Sarah was being grilled. While Phillip had the better equipment in his office, he knew that he had no excuse for being there. Anyone questioning his presence in Jamie's office would be met with the flimsy reason he had used that morning.

"Back to help me, Granger?"

"Sure."

Jamie snorted. "I wish I was always this popular. I'm not explaining your presence to Francine, if she asks. That's up to you."

"I'm ready. I'm checking background information. It's for my reports."

"Right." Jamie rolled his eyes. "Well, there's no sign of her or anyone else, yet."

In the conference room, Sarah could barely maintain her calm demeanor. The female defense attorney, Teresa Sandoval, was relentless. Her cross examination following the morning's testimony had lasted for a full hour. Every few minutes Greg Peterson or the prosecution attorneys would raise an objection and stall her testimony. But not at the moment.

"Were you aware when you forced the other car off the road that it could endanger the other car's occupants, Miss Granger?"

"Yes. But I—"

"It seems you have a habit of causing accidents. Did you not admit in another deposition that you placed a driver in a choke hold in order to cause an accident?"

"Objection. Question is irrelevant."

"But Mr. Peterson, the question is quite relevant. I am trying to establish a pattern of reckless behavior in your witness."

"Miss Sandoval, you are badgering the witness. Miss Stetson is not on trial. And she received a head injury in the accident that helped her escape the men who had kidnapped her."

"My apologies." Sandoval's tight smile displayed her lack of sincerity.

Sarah was appalled by the attorney's lack of remorse. She was determined to discredit Sarah as a witness. Her stomach roiled when she saw Peterson nod his acceptance.

"Let me rephrase. Were you choking the driver at the time of the other accident, Miss Stetson?"

"It was the only way to keep their hands off the guns."

While the court stenographer took notes on Sarah's reply, Sandoval made a face. Peterson beamed at Sarah. Teresa Sandoval had not counted on Sarah finding a way to deflect her attack.

Sandoval consulted her notes. "Let's go back to that earlier day. After you forced the car off the road, did you attempt to render aid?"

Sarah knew she had somehow won this round. The attorney was grasping at straws. "It was not necessary, as there were emergency vehicles pulling up. Besides, I could not easily exit my vehicle after being sideswiped."

As the stenographer continued to type in Sarah's responses, Sarah noticed the telltale blush on Sandoval's face as she looked down and cleared her throat.

Peterson held Sarah back as everyone else exited the room. Once it had emptied, he spoke quietly. "Good move there, Sarah. The best defense is a good offense. She didn't see that coming. One has to answer the questions straight out, but you figured out how to make your answer work for you."

"Don't take this the wrong way, Greg, but most attorneys seem…" Sarah looked apologetically at Peterson as she searched for the word she wanted.

"Don't bother finishing. I agree. I hope you don't see me that way. I've got your back, hon."

"I know you do. My dad told me you would be there for me. Thanks. This ended a lot better than I expected."

As they walked out of the room together, Matt was waiting across from the doorway.

Peterson was quick to address him. "Take her out somewhere nice tonight, Granger. She did a good job in there. Help her take her mind off the depositions." He winked at Matt.

Before either Matt or Sarah could respond, the veteran Agency attorney was down the hall, punching the elevator button.

Matt looked down at Sarah. "I take it that you had it easier than we thought?"

"Yes." She sighed. "Teresa Sandoval tried to intimidate me into answering yes or no, but I caught her off guard—made the defendants look bad. Or at least, I didn't look bad."

"Sounds like she was 'badgering the witness.'"

"You've heard that phrase recently, too?"

"Yeah. Come on. You may not be hungry yet, but you might be soon." He took her hand and led her to the elevator. "We can stop by Jamie's office and grab your coat."

"You don't have to take me to dinner."

"Actually, it sounds like a great idea."

"You don't have reports to work on?"

"They can wait."

Suddenly, Sarah realized that she was hungry. Very hungry. "Dinner would be nice. I know we were just there, but let's go to 'our place.' I'm in the mood for fettuccine. And I may just finish it."

Grinning now, Matt looked over at her as they boarded the elevator. "That's my girl. Martini's it is."


	8. Chapter 8

The next morning, Sarah found herself wishing she could be back at Martini's with Matt. There were not many people in the world whom Sarah had ever truly disliked, but Teresa Sandoval was one of them.

While the prosecutor, Stephen Willis, had been thorough, he had made an obvious effort to make her testimony as quick as possible under the circumstances. It had been painful to replay the images that had haunted her memories and her nightmares, but the attorney had seemed understanding and kind as she told of the four men who had attacked her and Matt that day last fall. Miss Sandoval was another story.

"So you did not try to talk with Diego Jimenez before you knifehanded him?"

"No. All of them men had pulled knives. They outnumbered—"

"So you were looking for the next man you could take out after Mr. Jimenez was down, is that right, Miss Stetson?"

"Objection. Miss Stetson is not under trial. Please strike that last question." Greg Peterson's mouth was a flat line. "If you continue to badger the witness, Miss Sandoval, the deposition will be over."

Teresa Sandoval did not respond, continuing her questioning instead.

"Did you check on Diego Jimenez's condition, or come to the aid of Marcelo Jimenez, both of whom were unconscious on the ground at this point?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"I was too worried about the attack on Agent Granger."

"You felt you could assist him with his knife fight?"

"I don't know, I—"

"So you ignored the injured men on the ground?"

"Objection. Miss Stetson and Mr. Granger were outnumbered. They are not on trial."

Sandoval straightened in her chair and adjusted her suit jacket. "So you did not assist the men who lay unconscious on the ground?"

"I was too busy watching Matt, looking for an opportunity to help him in some way. He had already been injured at that point."

"Let's talk about Luis Santiago. You said he took you by surprise."

"Yes."

"Did he hurt you at first?"

"No. Only when he—"

"I understand you went through family training at the Agency when you were young—middle school, was it?"

"Yes."

"And again later?"

"Yes. Two more sessions. In high school, then in college."

"What did your training teach you about hostage situations, when you are held and threatened with a weapon?"

"Relax and cooperate with the abductor. If there are operatives present, let them manage the situation."

"I see. Then how did you get that scar on your neck?"

"We had stopped moving. I didn't realize Santiago was dragging me away."

"So you fought him?"

"No."

"Miss Stetson, you were begging him to stay, so you could help your friend. Is that right?"

"That was before. He hadn't cut me yet."

"How did you get the scar on your neck, Miss Stetson?"

"I don't know. Santiago was being careless. The knife was sharp. He didn't care—"

"Or you fought him, causing the knife to cut you. Is that right, Miss Stetson?"

"Objection. Attorney badgering and leading the witness. Please strike that last comment from the record." Willis held up a hand to Peterson, who looked like he might be ready to take Sarah from the room.

"Miss Stetson, were there any other operatives there besides Mr. Granger?"

"My father, Lee Stetson, who is the former section chief and a former operative. My mother, Amanda Stetson, is also a former operative. They were both there."

"Were they armed?"

"Yes."

"Yet you continued to fight?"

"I hadn't been fighting."

"Clearly you had been. Medical personnel found bruises on your arms that indicated you had resisted. Isn't this resistance against the protocol for this kind of situation, Miss Stetson?"

Sarah had been unaware of any bruising. Or perhaps she just couldn't remember. She wracked her brain. Her memory grew fuzzy at this point. "There may have been bruises. I don't recall."

Greg Peterson shook his head furiously.

Concerned she had said too much, she looked at Peterson, then back at Teresa Sandoval. Anxiety began to well up inside of her. _Oh, please don't let me have a flashback now._

"Miss Stetson, your mother said they were able to pinpoint your location when they heard you pleading with the men to let you go. Then, as your father attempted to bring the situation under control, he said you began begging Mr. Santiago to let you go. At this point, your neck had begun bleeding. Were you resisting, or were you not?"

Sarah glanced down, then back up at Sandoval. "I may have been. What does it matter?"

"Miss Stetson, I must ask you to only answer the questions."

Sarah spoke as if she had not heard Teresa Sandoval. "Luis Santiago was dragging me away. He left a permanent scar on my neck." Sarah's hands shook. Clasping them together, she pressed them down into her lap.

"Were you resisting when your father aimed his gun at Mr. Santiago?"

"I don't know." She gritted her teeth as they threatened to chatter.

"What do you mean, you do not know? Certainly you can remember your own father aiming a gun in your direction."

"My father would not aim a gun at me." Sarah could no longer hide her trembling. She could feel her shoulders shaking.

Peterson practically jumped out of his chair. "Objection. Badgering the witness. This is bordering on cruelty. Miss Stetson and Mr. Granger were victims of an awful attack. I'm removing my client." He stood and began to take Sarah's arm.

"I am almost done, Mr. Peterson. Miss Stetson, did you resist when your father aimed the gun at you and Mr. Santiago? Were you trying to get away from your father or Mr. Santiago?"

Sarah had wracked her brain for months now, occasionally adding new pieces to the puzzle that was her remembrance of that day in the park. But she had never been able to account for the reason why she had ended up on the ground, apparently next to Luis Santiago's body. Her head had been spinning, and flashing lights had danced around the edges of her vision and across it, but she had been coherent enough to get up and go to Matt. She could remember helping him. Why could she not remember how Santiago had died?

"Miss Stetson, you are under oath to answer my questions to the best of your ability. Did you resist—"

As Sarah looked down at her hands, she saw that they had stopped shaking. She resolved to speak with assurance. "No, Miss Sandoval, I did not. My father is a prof—"

"How can you explain the cut on your neck or your bruises, then, if you were not trying to get away from Mr. Santiago? Perhaps Mr. Santiago was merely trying to keep you away from danger and you fought too hard."

Greg Peterson had clearly had enough. He stood up, leaned over to the control panel, and switched off the recording equipment. "That's the end of this deposition. Sarah, you don't have to say another word."

"That will be all, Miss Stetson. Thank you."

_Professional._ That was the word she had tried to say just now. As usual, she had been cut off. Surely her father had not endangered her. She wracked her brain again, searching for a memory that would not come to her. _And what had Teresa Sandoval said to make Gary so angry?_ She had focused so hard on trying to remember what her father had been doing that Sarah felt as if she had blanked out briefly at the end of the deposition. She felt a hand on her shoulder.

Looking around her, Sarah realized that the room had emptied of all the attorneys and court staff except Gary Peterson. And it was Matt's hand on her shoulder. Had she blacked out again? No. She had been lost in thought. _That was it_.

"Come on, Sarah. Let's eat lunch. I went out and picked us up some sandwiches." Matt placed his hand under her elbow, urging her from the seat.

"I'm okay."

She watched as Matt shot a quick look to the Agency attorney. Gary Peterson lifted an eyebrow, and the concern was evident in his eyes. "Go home, Sarah. Call your folks and have them give you a ride."

"I said I'm okay. I drove my car. Matt and I can have lunch, and then I have a training session with Leatherneck." She picked up her purse and coat and walked with Matt to the doorway, at the last second turning back towards Peterson. "I'm done, right? I don't have to answer any more questions?"

Peterson sighed heavily. "I'd love to guarantee that, but most likely, you are done Sarah. You can move on now."

"Good. I hope I never see Teresa Sandoval again." She smiled ruefully at the old friend of her parents.

"You and me both, but I won't be so lucky. Neither will your fiancé here. Go eat some lunch. He has to be back here soon." Peterson picked up his briefcase. "Enjoy planning your wedding. Try to forget all of this."

"Thanks, Gary." Smiling genuinely now, Sarah set her purse and coat down quickly to give Peterson a hug. Then she had gathered her things and was out the door ahead of Matt.

"Keep an eye on her at lunch, Granger. Sandoval really had her shaken up. I had to stop the deposition early." Peterson's voice was low, and he spoke quickly.

"I will. See you in a bit." Matt was out the door before Sarah could come back to get him.

Jamie was in a meeting when they arrived at his office to gather up the lunch that Matt had brought from the deli. His interns were busy at work on the computers in the workroom adjacent.

"We can't stay here if Jamie isn't around, but we can use the conference room down the hall."

Sarah followed him out of the office, but once in the hallway, he slowed his pace so he could walk alongside of her. He watched her out of the corner of his eye.

Matt waited until they were settled with their food before he said anything. "You okay?"

"Yes. It was hard, but I'm okay." She busied herself with her sandwich and did not look up.

Matt regarded her with narrowed eyes. He reached over and tipped her chin with his finger so he could see her face. "You're not okay, Sarah. I think you should go home."

"I really am better now. I thought I was going to have a flashback. I almost wish I had. The attorney was asking me about my dad aiming a gun at Luis Santiago, and I couldn't remember it." She drew away, almost as if she was uncomfortable with his close scrutiny of her.

While it was apparent that Sarah was being honest with him, Matt still felt an unease, as if a wall had gone up between them. He did not know what to make of it. _This is so unlike her._

They were quiet for the next few minutes. Sarah only nibbled at her sandwich, while Matt ate his with more enthusiasm. Swallowing a bite, he looked over at her. "I hope it's okay I got you the turkey and Swiss. I was afraid we wouldn't have time to eat if I didn't go out and get the food for us."

"Oh, it's good. It was really thoughtful of you. I may just save the rest of this for later, though."

"Your stomach still in knots?"

"Isn't yours? You still have your deposition coming up."

"I am a little nervous. But I guess I figure God has it all worked out. I'll take it as it comes."

"I wish I could just forget. I keep replaying things."

Matt got up and threw away his sandwich wrapper. Returning to his seat, he took Sarah's hands in his own. "Would you like to pray? God can calm your heart and mine, too."

Sarah did not say anything, but she gripped Matt's hands and bowed her head.

After they prayed, Matt placed his hand on her cheek. "You don't need to remember it all, Sarah. Sometimes it's best if we forget things." He leaned in and kissed her gently. "You've had a hard morning. I really wish you would go home."

He could see she was making an effort to be cheerful when she grinned at him. "I'm fine. Maybe you'll get out early and you can come watch my simulation. It won't be ready for another half hour at least."

His mouth tipped at the corners, but his eyes did not smile, too. "I wish you wouldn't push yourself so hard. You have nothing to prove. It would be a miracle if I got out early. But if I do, I'll be there." He checked his watch. "For now, I had better get to the conference room." He reached into the deli bag and produced an apple. "Would you at least eat this? I have another in my desk."

The apple seemed more appealing than the sandwich to Sarah. "Thanks. That looks good." Taking the bag with her leftover sandwich, she crunched down on the apple as they walked together towards the elevator.

"I'll text you when I'm done here, okay? If I get out early, I'll look for you down by the range—or if you change your mind and go home, text me. I'll see you there."

"I'm fine, Matt."

As the elevator pinged its arrival, Matt grabbed her hand and kissed it quickly. "Love you," he whispered.

Before Sarah could respond, the elevator doors were closing and Matt was no longer in sight.

SMKSMKSMKSMKSMKSMK

Lee touched the screen of his phone, ending the call. Staring at the phone thoughtfully, he only vaguely noticed when Amanda came up beside his chair.

"Your lunch is getting cold."

He glanced up at her, now fully aware of her presence. "Oh, I'm sorry. I just got off the phone with Gary Peterson."

"And?"

"He was pretty worried about Sarah. He said that when the questioning ended, she just sat in her seat, staring, until Matt came into the room and 'woke her up,' as he put it."

"Flashback?"

"I don't know. Matt probably would have called us to pick her up if that was the case."

Amanda continued to question Lee as they sat down to lunch. "How did it go overall?"

"Not quite so well as yesterday. Sandoval is trying to pull for mitigating circumstances. Making it look like Sarah brought some of the trouble on herself, escalated the situation by fighting Santiago. She played the hostage training card."

"As in, she wasn't as calm as she should have been?"

"Something like that. But she was standing still. I said that in my deposition. She had bruises on her arms, but Santiago had a tight hold on her—and she fought Jimenez."

"She doesn't remember you taking the shot."

"No. Let's hope she never does." Lee pushed his soup bowl away and leveled his eyes at Amanda. "I haven't told you the entire reason I started going back to Kirby."

She put her spoon down and waited for him to continue.

"I've had the most awful feeling that I'd failed her."

"You saved her life and Matt's."

"They never should have been attacked. I should have insisted they go to the safe house sooner."

"But Matt's okay now. You did what you thought was best for them. And, quite frankly, you helped bring things to an end. They took Sarah from the safe house, Lee."

"But still. We could have avoided—"

"Lee, you're talking about 'what ifs.' It's not your fault the cartel targeted her. And it's behind her now. The testimony is over, right?"

He looked down at the table, idly running a finger along the grain of the wood. "Yes, it's over."

"Now you can help Sarah put the past behind her. What is she doing this afternoon? More practice at the track? Weren't you going to ride along again?"

"Leatherneck has her in the arena."

"What are you waiting for then?"

Lee looked up at his wife. Perhaps if he concentrated on helping Sarah, his own demons about the case would go away. Getting up from his seat, he leaned down to kiss her. "I guess I'd better head over there right now if I'm going to get there in time to watch."

"I'll see you later, Scarecrow." She grinned up at him.

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Crouching behind a stack of crates, Sarah released the Glock's empty magazine and replaced it with a fully loaded one. This simulation had been more challenging than the rest. Or was it just her nerves? Fairly certain that she was not far from the friendly fire, she continued cautiously toward her goal. She was trying to arrive undetected at a better vantage point for taking out the shooter while her fellow agents "distracted" him.

Hunching over, she ran as quickly as she could behind the crates to the side of the building. A homeless man popped up three feet away. Spotting the handle of a pistol partially hidden under his jacket, she fired quickly.

"Good Sarah. You didn't give him time to fire at you first."

Leatherneck looked away from the monitors and the computer tracking Sarah's progress just long enough to note Lee entering the room. Grinning, he lifted a hand to him and turned back to concentrating on the simulation.

Knowing that today's depositions would most likely have been grueling for her, Leatherneck had decided against running Sarah through the arena. Instead, he thought she might practice her target shooting or lock-picking skills. Grant Hill had asked for some tutorial time as well. But Sarah had been determined to run the simulation in the arena. In the end, Leatherneck gave in, determining that he could use this exercise as a means of measuring Sarah's responses while under stress. While she had had some "field experience" already at the hands of the Mexican cartel, she had not been armed at the time. So, he and Hill had set up the arena, and the young intern had stayed to watch.

Noticing Hill with a headset watching quietly from a corner, Lee nodded to him, then went to stand next to Leatherneck. "Who's the kid back there?" he whispered.

Leatherneck muted his mic. "An intern. May end up in Sarah's class. Wong and Francine haven't decided on him yet." He handed Lee a headset.

"Why's he watching?"

"He helped me set up the arena."

Lee nodded, then donned the headset and focused his attention on his daughter.

Sarah crept along the side of the building, knowing she would have a clear shot as she reached the corner. A doorway lay between her and the goal. Inching forward, she was hesitant, unsure if the doorway might be her undoing.

Without warning, a pop-up shot out of the doorway, blocking her path. It was a man, with his gun raised at her face. The silver hair was unmistakable in the dim light next to the building, and she recognized the outline of his body. She pointed her gun at the ceiling and took a step closer so she could see the man more clearly. This was not only a fellow agent. She was staring at her father, who was aiming a gun at her.

She could almost feel the vise-like grip on her arm and the sharp pain at her throat. She was no longer in the arena. She was back at the park, and Luis Santiago wanted to take her away. She knew Matt lay helpless somewhere nearby. He had been stabbed, and he needed her help. He might even be dead now. But no, he was struggling to his feet, his knife in his hand. And her father was holding a gun, its barrel pointed at her. Or was it aimed at Santiago? It did not matter. The cold look in her father's eyes was chilling. Surely it was intended for Santiago. But she was frightened and fighting to stay rational.

Lee and Santiago exchanged words, but Sarah could not hear them. The voice was insistent in her ear, but she did not register what it was saying. Out of the corner of her eye, she thought Matt might be preparing to throw his knife at Santiago. But he was so weak, she wondered how he was standing. She looked in her father's eyes, but they were trained on Santiago. Now he was pulling the trigger. No! A gunshot reverberated around her and she felt herself thrown—or was it pulled?—backward violently. But she did not land on the ground. Back in the arena once again, she was still on her feet. Tearing off her headset, she sank to her knees and cried out.

After trying unsuccessfully to get Sarah's attention several times, Leatherneck zoomed the camera in on her location. The image was not clear, but she seemed frozen in place at first, before falling to her knees. He heard her cry out in terror and watched as she pulled off her headset, dropping it to the ground along with her gun.

Leatherneck tore off his headset at the same time. The three men looked at one another in alarm and confusion. Leatherneck turned on the P.A. system. "Sarah! Are you okay?" His voice echoed throughout the arena, but there was no response.

"What's going on?" Lee searched the other monitors. "Is someone in there with her?" Unable to see anything, he turned to Leatherneck, a panicked expression on his face. "Has she been hit?"

"Something is wrong, Lee, but she's in there alone."

Lee reached the door first, tearing down the arena steps as if he were a young agent again. "Sarah! Are you okay? What's going on?"

He heard running feet, then a door slam. "Sarah!" Lee ran towards the source of the sound—the door to the hallway. "Sarah!"

Reaching the armory, Sarah was unsure how she had gotten there. She calmed her breathing for a moment, and then started to go in to lock up her gun. But she had left it on the floor of the arena. She would be in trouble for not returning the gun herself. She should have at least turned it over to Leatherneck, who would be held responsible. Glancing back toward the arena, she thought of her father, who would be following her out into the hallway. She could not go back there.

Going to the locker room where she had left her purse, she grabbed it and her coat, and made her way to the stairs leading to the parking garage.

Lee reached the doorway to the hall and opening it, looked for Sarah. She was nowhere to be seen. He stopped and pulled out his phone. It was answered after the second ring.

"Lee! Why are you calling me on this line?"

"Phillip. Don't ask questions. See if you can locate your sister on the cameras or with her GPS. She was last seen near the lower level of the arena. Call me when you find her. Something went wrong with her simulation."

"I'll call you as soon as I know anything." Phillip did not bother with any further pleasantries, ending the call abruptly.

Lee turned back to the Arena doorway and knocked loudly with the side of his fist. Not even his clearance as section chief could have opened the door without a special override from security—and he was no longer the section chief. But Leatherneck would hear his pounding.

"What the hell is going on?" Lee ran a hand through his hair as he strode past Grant Hill, who had opened the door, and over to Leatherneck. The lights had been turned up so there were no longer any shadows and each pop up could be clearly seen. Including one that bore a remarkable resemblance to Lee. "Oh my God." Everything was now crystal clear.

"I'm so sorry, Lee. I have no idea how this one ended up in Sarah's simulation. I thought I checked all of the pop-ups myself."

"Not all of them." Hill was apologizing profusely. "We were in a hurry. You didn't check all of the ones I set up. I didn't think it would be any worse than the little old ladies or the homeless guy. He was supposed to be a friendly. An easy friendly."

Both of the older men glared at Hill, who was looking more and more chagrined by the minute. "I'm so sorry. I really blew it, didn't I?"

Leatherneck ran a hand through his hair and sighed heavily. "No, it's my fault, Hill. I should have checked your pop-ups. Or at least warned you not to use that one."

Lee looked at his likeness and grimaced. "Or tossed it altogether. I don't work here anymore. At least not on a regular basis." His phone buzzed. "Stetson."

Phillip was on the other end of the line. "Lee, she's in her car, on her way out of the garage. I spotted her on the cameras and I'm tracking her phone."

"Thanks, Phillip. Please keep tracking her GPS. Let me know where she's headed."

"Lee, what's going on?"

"I'll call you back, Phillip." He lowered the phone from his ear, ending the call. "I'm going after Sarah, Leatherneck."

"I'm really sorry, Lee. Do you want me to come along?"

"No, you stay here and take care of things." He gestured to the handgun that lay on the floor of the arena.

"What the?" Stooping down, Leatherneck reached for the gun. It was Sarah's Glock. He removed the magazine, pulled back the slide, and checked for cartridges in the chamber. He looked up at Lee. "This never happened." Looking around for Hill, he noted with satisfaction that the intern was now busy in another part of the arena and would not have seen the gun on the floor.

"I'm really sorry, Ace. Please tell her for me."

"I will. And thanks, my friend." Lee pointed his chin at the Glock in Leatherneck's hand. "I've got to run."

Lee ran up the stairs to the observation room and grabbed his jacket. He jogged to the garage, returning Phillip's call once he was in the car and driving away from the Agency.

"Lee. Sarah seems to be headed home, judging by her GPS signal. Will you tell me what happened? Why all the panic?"

"Something went wrong in the arena today during her simulation. I don't think she's hurt—there's no blood. But she was upset about something. I wish I could tell you more. Please keep an eye on her GPS signal. Let me know if she doesn't go home."

"Got it."

"Thanks, Phillip. And this is eyes only. We don't need to attract any undue attention to Sarah."

"Yes, Sir."

Lee had purposefully not told Phillip about his sister's grave breach of firearms protocol. _Never leave a weapon unattended._ While he hoped that the incident today was nothing serious, a nagging feeling in the pit of his stomach made him think that was only the beginning of another issue of some sort for Sarah. _Oh God. Hasn't she had enough trouble these last few months?_

He called Amanda.

"Hi, Lee. How did Sarah do?"

"Not so great. Listen, where are you right now? Are you at home?"

"I'm at the grocery store."

"Can you go home right now? You're probably closer than me."

"Uh, I didn't go to our usual store. I went to that natural grocer over near Fairfax…" She could hear Lee's grunt of frustration. "Lee, what's wrong?"

"Hopefully nothing, but Sarah ran out of the simulation a little while ago. Left her gun on the floor of the arena. I've seen her with that Glock and other weapons at the Agency, Amanda. I've taken her to the range for years. She's never been that irresponsible before. Something really spooked her. I'll explain more when I see you."

"Should I just go home right now?"

"No, finish your errand. You have enough on your plate. I'll talk with her."

As they ended the conversation, Lee hoped that he could help Sarah—if she was willing to talk with him.


	9. Chapter 9

The blaring horn of the car next to Sarah brought her attention back to the road. She was nearing the intersection close to her home. As she turned onto Maplewood, she breathed a sigh of relief. Her mother's car seemed to be gone. She knew her father would not be there—she had a head start on him.

Somehow she stopped the car in the driveway as the image of Lee pulling the trigger replayed in her mind. While another round of cold weather had come to their region the day before, it was not the cause for the ice that now ran in her veins_. Daddy fired a gun at me. Oh God! Why? What do I do?_ The cold feeling of despair that washed over her also left a knot in her middle. _I can't face him. _Blindly she made her way up the stairs and into her apartment, mindlessly punching in the alarm code as she entered the apartment.

Sarah felt a desperate need to run somewhere. Literally. She also wanted to be alone. Not able to face her father, she also knew that she could not put her mother in the middle. Glancing around at the walls of her apartment, she felt claustrophobic, caged in. And she did not want to be there when her father arrived.

A few minutes later she was tying the laces on her running shoes and zipping up her hooded sweatshirt. She stretched quickly, certain that her father would arrive home any minute. Every noise she heard outside the apartment made her stomach tighten. Looking out the window to the empty driveway did not make the sensation go away.

As she rounded the corner at the end of her block, she breathed a small sigh of relief that quickly was replaced by a gasp. _Oh no! I've forgotten my cell phone. I never texted Matt. And I didn't even set the alarm at the apartment, for that matter._ She turned around and stopped as she reached the corner again. Lee's silver BMW was just pulling in the driveway. A split second sooner, and he would have seen her. She turned around and ran off, anxious to put some distance between her and the house.

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Seeing the drinking fountain in the park, Sarah stopped to wet her dry mouth. She guessed that she had been running for over an hour. But she had been taking a much slower pace than her usual, running from park to park. Working her way northwest from her house, she stayed off the streets as much as possible. Now she was on a greenbelt that would eventually take her back towards Matt's apartment complex, but it was miles away and she was becoming more and more fatigued. It had been a long time since she had drunk her protein shake for breakfast, and she had only eaten a small amount of her sandwich and the apple at lunch.

Finding a sheltered spot by a tree, she listened to the wind in the branches above her as she stretched her legs and arms. The cold was making her cramp up, and she could tell she was becoming dehydrated. There had been a few occasions over the years when Sarah had called her parents to pick her up because she had been unable to finish a run. Usually the cause was a minor injury or cramping. Once she had realized she was getting sick. While these instances had been rare since she had become a serious runner, they had taught Sarah to keep a phone with her whenever she ran. _If I had the phone, Daddy could call._ She shuddered with the realization that she could not bear the thought of talking with her father. A sob threatened to bubble up, and she pushed it back down.

Sarah could not sort out the feelings of betrayal, fear, hurt, and yes, gratefulness that washed over her every time her mind went back to her father. It was painful to replay the image of him pulling the trigger, yet she knew deep down that he was protecting her—he had saved her life. Questions rattled through her brain. _But at what possible cost? Did he have no regard for my personal safety? Of course he cares about my safety. He's my father. He loves me. What kind of father would endanger their child like that? Oh, I can't talk to my parents. It's probably good I left the phone at the apartment. And they can't find me this way. No GPS._

Now she wished she had the phone so she could call Matt. _He's probably done with his deposition by now. Oh, I need to talk with him so badly. _It would be at least an hour before she reached his complex, and that was only if the cramps went away. She stretched some more and started off in the direction of his apartment.

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Stepping off the elevator near the arena, Matt checked his cell phone once again. Still no text from Sarah. Puzzled, he pulled on the door of the observation room. It was locked. He went to the range and found Leatherneck working with a man who looked to be just out of college.

"Granger! Did Stetson reach you?"

"Lee? I'm looking for Sarah."

"So is Lee." Leatherneck pulled Matt aside. "I don't want Hill to overhear me. She ran out on us today, Man. It was my fault. We had a big snafu. My intern placed Lee as one of the pop-ups. Remember the one? He's aiming his gun right at you."

Matt nodded, trying to be patient.

"It's a great trick to pull on the freshmen—see if they can remember he's a friendly before they shoot him. But it wasn't funny for Sarah. She was pretty upset. I feel terrible. I should have caught it."

Matt had been listening with a growing sense of dread. He remembered the pop-up from his own training and could only imagine Sarah's reaction when she saw it. "Did she have a flashback?"

"I don't know."

Running his hand through his hair, Matt was growing more agitated by the moment. "I can't think why else she would have run off like that. Lee doesn't know where she is?"

"No. He's at the house, waiting to see if she'll show back up. No one was home when she got to her apartment. He's driven the neighborhood looking for her, but she was nowhere to be found."

"Why hasn't Phillip run a GPS check?"

"Her phone is at the apartment. He's running facial recognition software on the CC and traffic camera feeds, but nothing has come up since she turned onto Maplewood Drive ninety minutes ago."

Matt froze for an instant, one awful scenario playing through his mind after another. He shut down those thoughts and went to the door of the range. "Ninety minutes? I'd better get over there."

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Leaning his head in his hands, Matt found himself despairing. Sarah had definitely gone for a run. He was seated with his elbows on his knees on the edge of her neatly made bed, but the clothes she had worn to the Agency that day were scattered around him. She had been in a hurry. On another occasion, he would have chuckled that she left a bra out for him to see. In all the months they had known each other, and even during the time they had lived in the safehouse, she had always been so modest. However, he could not find the humor in the situation. Sarah had been missing for nearly three hours, not a long time for a person to be gone. But three hours in this weather was a long time for a run. _Two hours would have been a long run. She should be back by now. She cramps up when it's cold._

The apartment door opened and Matt jumped up. "Sarah?" he choked out.

His fiancée's mother appeared in the doorway of the bedroom. "It's just me, Matt. I didn't mean to get your hopes up." Amanda was sorrier for Matt than for herself. She knew in her heart that Sarah would come home when she was ready. Her daughter was like her father. They dealt with their problems by retreating into themselves, but after a time, they were ready to reach out for help. Sarah would reach out soon enough. Neither man had been reassured when she had told them that, however. Lee was brooding in his den, waiting for updates from Phillip.

After not spotting Sarah as he searched the streets in a widening circle around 4247 Maplewood, Matt had driven back to the house. Finding no updates, he had wandered over to the apartment above the garage to search for clues that would lead him to Sarah.

From Matt's expression, Amanda knew the answer to her next question. "Did you find anything else? Lee looked around pretty thoroughly."

"Well, she definitely went for a run. And she definitely doesn't have her phone." He held up the phone in his hand, and then put it in the charging dock on the bedside table by Sarah's purse.

Looking around the room at the evidence her daughter had left as she had hastily prepared for her run, Amanda sighed. She placed a hand on Matt's arm. "Why don't you go to your apartment? I would love to offer you a cup of coffee and some company, but…"

"…maybe Sarah headed to my place?" Matt was hopeful now. After thinking for a moment, his face tightened up again. "But I can't help but think she would have texted me to say she was going there."

Amanda could not read all of the emotions that flashed across his face, but she guessed he might not just be worried, but angry as well. She could not blame him. It had not been fair of Sarah to worry Matt like this. "That may be true, but I wouldn't take her lack of communication to you as a slight. She didn't bother to put away her clothes. I think she left too quickly to remember the phone. By the time she remembered it, she may have been too far away. I hate to say it, but I think she's avoiding her father and me."

"I'm sorry for it, but I can see why she might avoid Lee. Why you?"

"She doesn't want to put me in the middle."

Matt considered her words and nodded. "I guess I should go home, then. Please call me…"

"Of course." She hugged Matt briefly, then walked with him out the door of the apartment, watching while he set the alarm and locked it behind them with his key. If Sarah did come home, she would need to go to the house to get a key. She had left hers on the bed.

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Jogging in place and stretching, Sarah watched as Matt's neighbors, coming home from work for the day, began to trickle into his building from the parking lot. There had been no answer when she had rung the buzzer for Matt's apartment and she had not seen his car. With dusk approaching, the lights of the complex were beginning to illuminate the parking lot and walkways near the buildings. While Matt's apartment windows remained dark, lit Christmas trees could be seen in some of the apartment windows. Several tenants had strung lights on their balconies. Despite the cheeriness of the complex, Sarah grew increasingly uncomfortable. Soon it would be completely dark where Sarah stood. When Matt did not appear, she started to run back the way she had come, through the trees behind the parking lot, away from the street. _You need to go home girl. You're running away from your parents, when you're getting married in three weeks anyway. And they love you, you know that._ Unbidden, her mind conjured up the image of Lee pointing the gun in her direction, and the cold, impassive look on his face. She stopped. _I can't go home_. She fought the urge to sob.

Just then, Sarah heard the familiar low rumble of Matt's Charger—or what she hoped was his car—in the parking lot. She jogged back towards the apartments and peered through the trees towards the covered area where Matt kept his vehicle. He was just stepping out of the Charger. Seeing him wearing his overcoat and gloves, Sarah was reminded that she had been outside for well over two hours, maybe three, in less than adequate clothing. She pulled up her hood.

Matt peered around the parking lot, and searched for something or someone in the direction of his apartment building's door.

Now that she had stopped running, a chill was taking hold in her middle. She had been unaware of it until she saw him. Overcome with a need once again to be near him, having him comforting her, Sarah was drawn to Matt. However, as she watched him, something held her back, giving her pause. The look on his face was unreadable. He walked with his usual erect posture, but there was something unusual about his bearing. He was tense. He continued to glance around, looking back towards the greenbelt as he made his way to the building door. Pushing aside her misgivings, she ran to catch up with him.

"Matt."

The tension in his shoulders visibly eased as he turned towards the sound of her voice, breathless from her dash across the parking lot. "Sarah! Oh, thank God." As his eyes swept over her body, taking in her appearance, his joy faded into a frown. He held out his free hand towards her as he held the door open with his other hand. "Come inside. You look cold."

Taking Matt's hand, Sarah felt apprehension growing once again. Neither said anything as they walked to his apartment. As he unlocked the deadbolt, Matt nodded in greeting to a neighbor who entered the building from the street entrance, then ushered Sarah into the apartment. After turning off the alarm and locking the door, he hurriedly pulled off his gloves.

Despite the relative warmth of the apartment, Sarah found herself shaking uncontrollably, her legs, shoulders, and abdominal muscles cramping from her extended time in the cold air. And she was thirsty. Very thirsty. She stood silently regarding Matt as he reached inside his overcoat for his phone and began texting. His mouth was set and his expression was guarded. _This must be his operative training coming out. He's hiding his emotions. Why?_

"Everyone is worried sick about you. Your dad is practically a basket case. I wanted to wait at your apartment, but when you didn't come back, your mother urged me to come here and wait for you. Good thing I did." Finishing the text, Matt set the phone down on a side table as he removed his overcoat. During the next minute, the phone vibrated once, twice, then three times. After hanging up his coat and closing the closet door, Matt checked the texts. His voice was cool as he spoke again. "That would be your parents, Phillip, and Rene. Jamie was with Phillip. He wouldn't leave the office until we found you, and Phillip wouldn't let anyone else check the CC cameras." Finally Matt directed his gaze at her.

"I didn't mean to forget my phone." Her eyes never leaving Matt's, Sarah took a step back. "Maybe I should just go home." Cursing her lower lip for trembling, she looked toward the door.

"How did you get here?" The hard edge had left Matt's voice. He drew closer to Sarah. "Where have you been? You left your Volvo and your wallet at your parents' house. Did someone drive you here?"

"I ran."

Matt's look was at first incredulous, then disturbed. "Sarah, we've been looking for you for three, almost four hours. I thought you had gone running, but how could you have run that entire time?"

"Has it been that long?"

As if unable to control himself any longer, Matt stepped quickly towards her. "After going that far, you were standing around in this cold wearing only these workout clothes? What were you thinking?" He pushed down her hood, and then took her hands and began removing her gloves. "Oh God, you're like ice." He pulled her to him then, wrapping his arms around her. Her skin was cold to the touch and she continued to tremble with the chill and fatigue. He imagined her emotions had something to do with her shaking as well.

"I was so worried. Why did you do this?"

"I didn't know what to do when I saw the pop-up. It was my dad." Sarah wanted to cry, but held it in, the hard knot in her stomach growing worse.

Matt held her more tightly to him. He could feel the tension in her muscles, most likely from both the cold and the stress she had endured that day.

"I had to leave the Agency. Then, when I got home, the whole thing was haunting me. I just had to get out and clear my mind. And I couldn't face my dad. So, I put on my running clothes and started running."

"You've been running this entire time? You must have gone over fifteen miles—you had enough time to do more than twenty." Although Matt's voice had lost its flinty edge, Sarah sensed a tension that she had rarely seen in him before.

Sarah stepped back out of his embrace, still uncertain. "Maybe twelve," her voice dropped to almost a whisper the next two words. "Or fifteen. I stopped more than once to take a break." _And cry._ "I was waiting out by the greenbelt for about a while, maybe an hour, jogging in place and stretching." She turned to go. "I shouldn't have come here. It's only a few miles if I go straight back and take the greenbelt part of the way." As she stepped away, Matt saw she was trembling visibly.

Compelled to action now, Matt reached out to take her arm, his grip firm, his voice almost desperate as he fought to contain his emotions. "No. It's freezing out there. You need to warm up." Propelling her to the bathroom, Matt reached in the linen closet and grabbed a towel, a washcloth, and the nylon bag that she kept at his apartment. Inside was a fresh change of clothes. He handed the towels and the bag to her. "Hold on a second."

He came back in less than a minute with the water bottle Sarah had left at his apartment. It was full. "You're probably dehydrated. Drink this." He reached for the door handle. "Take a long, warm shower. Not too hot. You don't want to burn yourself. Don't get out until you're not cold anymore. I'll make us some dinner." He started to close the door.

"Matt, wait."

His anger mostly dissipated now, Matt thought distractedly that Sarah's eyes seemed too large for her face. _Was this fear? Was she afraid of him? _He made an effort to look kindly at her. "What is it?" Before she could answer, he continued, "Oh. You'd probably like your own shampoo, instead of mine." He opened the linen closet again and after rummaging in the box from the hair stylist, handed her bottles of shampoo and conditioner.

She had not missed the transformation on his face. _He's forcing himself to be nice to me._ A powerful feeling of despair washed over her. She gave up on the idea of trying to talk with him. Taking the bottles, she murmured, "Thank you." Shutting the door, she turned on the water in the bathtub and leaned up against the wall. Hot tears ran down her face and she slid slowly to the floor, wrapping her arms around herself as she cried silently. _He's angry with me. I shouldn't have come here. I've alienated Matt and I can't even talk with my parents. _Bringing her sleeve to her mouth, she sobbed against her arm.

After a few minutes, heated air began to blow on her from the vent above her head. Calmer now, she wiped the tears from her face. _Perhaps that's a good sign. He's turned up the heat for me._ Sarah tugged at her laces and began removing her shoes. Reaching for the water bottle, she took a long drink before unzipping her hoodie. Once undressed, she stepped into the bathtub and closed the shower curtain. Turning on the showerhead, she stood under the streaming water.

Outside the bathroom, Matt listened for a moment. He thought he heard Sarah crying. Tempted to knock, he considered her possible state of undress and thought better of it. _That would be incredibly awkward. And besides, she's afraid to cry in front of you now._ He went to his bedroom to change his clothes while his emotions battled within him. _You let your anger get the better of you again, Granger. It's not going to accomplish anything if you frighten her. _He hung up his suit after throwing his dress shirt in the hamper. Opting to go barefoot in the overwarm apartment, he grabbed a sweatshirt for Sarah to wear, assuming she would still feel cold when she came out of the bathroom.

While the meat was thawing in the microwave and the water heating, his phone rang.

"Hi, Amanda."

"Hi, Matt. How's Sarah doing?"

_She's crying in my bathroom. Things are going great. _"Honestly, I'm not sure."

"How did she get to your place? It wouldn't have taken her all afternoon to run over there."

"She did run. But she put in a lot of extra miles along the way. Sarah said she thinks she went around twelve to fifteen. I'm betting it's more like fifteen—she said something about stopping now and then. Then she waited in the cold near my apartment for a long time. She was exhausted and freezing." Matt stopped and put a hand over his eyes, glad Amanda could not see him struggling with his emotions.

"Oh." Amanda's voice was concerned. "You know, she did something like that when my mother died."

"Amanda, I'm really struggling here. I want to be sympathetic, but when she showed up at my apartment, I realized I was angry with her. She was so thoughtless, going off like that. Not even Phillip could find her. She could have been injured. It was getting dark out. She could have been attacked." Matt opened the pantry door, reaching for a jar of pasta sauce and a package of spaghetti. He put the items down hard on the counter.

"But in all likelihood, probably nothing would have happened to her. She used to run early in the morning by herself. She knows how to be watchful and how to fight back."

Unintentionally, Matt slammed a pan down. If Amanda had reacted on her end, she did not let on that she had.

"But she scared the wits out of us. She's not like other people. She had the cartel chasing after her for months. And she's been through hell. Something happened in the arena today. Something that caused her to run aimlessly for over three hours in the cold. And I don't think it was just the pop-up, Amanda."_ If you're going to be a proper husband, Granger, you need to make more of an effort to figure out what's upsetting your future wife, instead of worrying about what's upsetting you. _

"The pop-up may have triggered some kind of memory—maybe from that day in the park. That alone would upset her. I was in a similar situation with Lee once. He had to pretend to shoot me. The bullet pierced my sweater. And he was just a friend at the time. This is her father."

"Well, I'm glad his aim is what it is."

"Me, too. When I watched him aim the gun at Luis Santiago, I knew he would not miss—that he was saving our daughter. But Sarah hasn't seen Lee in action before."

Matt was quiet, digesting her words.

Amanda saved him the trouble of thinking of a response. "Listen, I know you're trying to make dinner, Matt. I'll let you go. Try not to be too hard on Sarah. If this has something to do with Lee aiming a gun at her, it will take a little time for her to get over it."

"Thanks, Amanda. Hopefully she'll be willing to talk when she gets out of the shower." Matt resolved to work things out with Sarah as soon as she emerged from the bathroom. Hearing that the water was still running, he determined to have the dinner waiting when she came out.

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Amanda ended the call and regarded her husband, who was hunched over the couch, his elbows on his knees and his hands running through his hair.

"I've lost her, Amanda. I knew this would happen. This is what I've been fearing since I shot Santiago. She remembers now. I could have killed her. And it's my fault she had the concussion that day."

Joining Lee on the couch, Amanda wrapped an arm around his waist. "Please stop kicking yourself, Lee. We've been over this before. Kirby has spoken to you about this. You used your years of training to save Sarah from God knows what. We know they would have mistreated her. They might have killed her. Certainly she would never have been the same person even if we could have gotten her back."

"This should be the happiest time of her life. She's marrying a great guy in a couple of weeks. I guess she won't need me anymore."

"Oh, Lee. I would have given anything to have my father around when I was first married, when I was having the boys, and then Sarah. I wish he could have met you."

Regret in his eyes, Lee looked in his wife's face. "I'm sorry. I know you miss him. I should know better than anyone not to remind you about that."

"It's okay, Lee. I'm just trying to help you understand that Sarah isn't going to reject you because she's marrying Matt. For heaven's sake, you've practically adopted him as your own son."

Lee was silent for a few moments. "Well, he and I may be close, but Sarah won't even talk to me."

"Just give her some time. I certainly forgave you for aiming a gun at me years ago."

"That was different. You knew what I was doing. Sarah didn't know I'd actually fire my gun."

"The bullet pierced my sweater and you left me on a riverbank."

"Come on, Amanda. Do you realize what we're saying? I've shot at the two women I love most in the world. The very women I should be protecting. And it was different for you. You were practically an operative at the time. You'd had time in the field with me. Sarah has barely been exposed to all of this."

"Well, sitting here stewing about it won't help either. Maybe you can talk to her when she comes back later tonight."

A look of hope flickered across Lee's face for a moment and he moved to get up. "Yeah. Look. I should help you make dinner."


	10. Chapter 10

After donning clean underwear, a fresh t-shirt and athletic pants, Sarah attempted to pull her fingers through her hair. Opening the drawer, she found Matt's comb and gingerly worked through her tangles. Next, she went looking for a hair dryer, vaguely wondering if she would be successful. _Matt never dries his hair._ Finally she found a dryer under the sink, in the back.

When she emerged from the bathroom, she found Matt, barefoot and also dressed in a t-shirt and athletic pants, putting away the last of the pans in the kitchen. Not only had he cooked dinner, but he had already cleaned up the mess.

"You must be hot. The furnace is cranked up."

"I'm fine." He stepped towards her. "I made us some spaghetti. We can eat on the couch. You'll be warmer there. There's a sweatshirt and you can wrap up in a blanket. Go get comfortable and I'll bring your plate."

Sarah found the coffee table had been set with placemats, napkins, silverware, and water glasses. After pulling on the thick, oversized sweatshirt, she draped the afghan from the couch over her lap and curled up in the corner of the sofa, her feet tucked beneath her. Although she had put clean socks on her feet, they were chilled once again. The cramping had eased, but the cold knot in her middle had not gone away. Gazing at the Christmas tree, she felt an ache in her chest as she thought of the time they had spent together decorating the little tree, then dancing together afterwards. "You lit the tree while I was in the shower."

"I plug in the lights whenever I'm home. It makes me feel less lonely for you when we're not together."

"I'm glad I gave it to you, then." Sarah's smile wobbled.

"It was a sweet idea." Handing her a plate of spaghetti with some steamed vegetables on the side, Matt set his own plate on the table and sat down next to her. His expression was now contrite. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" _Don't cry._ She bit her lip.

"I was so angry with you for disappearing like that. I should have been more compassionate. Will you forgive me?"

Looking down at the plate in her hands, Sarah watched as tears started to drop onto her food. "I'm the one who should be sorry. I never meant to upset anyone. I should have brought my phone and called you. When I remembered it, I was afraid to go back. I just can't face my dad right now."

Taking the plate, Matt placed it on the table before reaching for her. He sighed with relief when she threw off the afghan and scrambled onto his lap.

"Oh, I needed this." Her words came out in a sob.

Wrapping his arms tightly around Sarah, Matt held her while she cried softly onto his shoulder. "I needed this, too. I can't remember ever being angry with you before. I had been worried sick about you. We had no clue where you were. I let my imagination get away from me. It took all my resolve not to fall apart in front of your parents. Then, when I saw you standing there, in one piece, I felt anger surging up inside of me."

When Sarah looked up at Matt's face, she was surprised to see tears there. "I'm so sorry. I hate that I made you angry."

"But I forgive you." He kissed her forehead, then her mouth before leaning his forehead against hers. "I'm just glad you were safe."

"I didn't realize how long I'd been gone. I just had to get away." She rested her head against his shoulder again. "You said you'd never been angry at me before. I've never been mad at my dad before. Not like this. Frustrated, maybe. Not angry. And I felt guilty. He saved my life. I was so overwhelmed at remembering everything finally. I didn't know what to do. How to process it. I still don't."

"I thought that's what it might be. Your dad said something about Leatherneck's assistant using the old obstacle course pop-ups by accident. I can just imagine now what happened."

"I had to make a split-second decision not to shoot my own father. Only, in that split-second, I suddenly realized that he had fired at me and Santiago—I had a flashback, I guess. I couldn't finish the simulation. I had to get out of there."

"I can see that. But as for trying to deal with it, that's what I'm here for. You're not alone. We're going to be married, knowing each other intimately. You should be able to share things with me, not run away. I have a right to know where you are—or at least have a general idea of what your plans are."

"That's why I came here. I needed you." Sarah's voice was small as she responded to his rebuke.

Matt nodded in understanding, his voice remorseful as he spoke. "And I was angry. I know I frightened you. I'm sorry." He kissed her hair.

"Please don't apologize. I should have called you and told you what I was doing. I'm sorry for worrying you so badly."

"I forgive you." He ran his hand down her arm. "I seem to remember begging your forgiveness not long ago, and you gave it readily.

"You know, your mom called while you were in the shower. She said to go easy on you. She already had you all figured out. Something about being in your shoes once before."

"She called? I'm glad she's not upset with me. This isn't her fault. I just don't know how to face Daddy. The entire time I was out running, I kept replaying the vision of him coldly pointing the gun at me. I know he wasn't aiming at me, but I can't help but wonder what would have happened if he had missed."

"Sarah, his aim was perfect. He went into operative mode. He's been an agent longer than you or I have been alive. He could only see one choice. It was either that or losing you. Or worse. The guy would have had my knife in his gut if I had had the strength to throw properly. As it was, I only made a dent in him."

Sliding off of his lap, Sarah brought her legs up so she could sit cross-legged. She regarded Matt. "I can remember you throwing the knife. You were barely able to stand up, let alone throw. But say you had not been injured. Would it really have been worth killing someone and possibly hitting me?"

"One of those men held an agent at knifepoint and nearly had his way with her. They're animals." He passed a hand over his eyes. "Please, let's not dwell on this. I'll go heat our dinners back up."

After they ate quietly together, Matt brought two mugs of hot chocolate to the couch. "I know it's not tea, but my girl gave it to me."

Chuckling, Sarah took a steaming mug and held it in her hands. "In a few weeks you'll have tea in your cupboard, too. I won't get through my stash by then."

"_We_ will have lots of things in _our_ cupboards. And I'm hoping my future wife will bake me muffins on a regular basis. That's how she won me over."

"I knew it was the cooking." Sarah offered Matt a wry smile. "Although you did pretty well on your own tonight. I'm impressed you had all this on hand."

"Oh well, before I met you, I got in the habit of keeping some basic ingredients around. I get tired of takeout. And you know I don't like frozen meals."

"Neither do I. It was very good. Thank you." Sarah leaned toward him and kissed his cheek, and then sat back again. "I've been really self-centered this evening. How was your deposition?"

"It was okay. Honestly, with the training I've had on hostile interrogations, it wasn't that bad."

Sarah laughed. "Really? You had to use your interrogation training to get through it?"

Matt raised his eyebrows and shrugged his shoulders. "Call it a coping mechanism. I answered the questions, but I didn't let her get to me." He looked in Sarah's face, remembering something. A shadow passed over his eyes. "…for the most part. I have to admit that it got to me when she made it sound like it was my fault they attacked us. The fact is, what she said was kind of true. As an agent, I should have had the common sense to keep you somewhere safe."

"Like a bird in a cage? For how long would that have gone on?" It was Sarah's turn for her face to cloud over. "Except it wasn't completely over that day, and you almost died. Those men came after us and attacked us." She shuddered at the memory.

"It's behind us now. We need to move on." He ran a hand through his hair. "Are you warming up yet?" Matt reached over and touched her face. Then, grasping her ankles, he drew her feet onto his lap and started massaging them.

"Oh, that feels good. I have to admit I'm pretty sore. At least I don't have blisters."

"You're still cold. It must be the long run you had. You can't keep yourself warm." He was thoughtful, as if he was struggling with some decision.

"I'm figuring you're planning to drive me home. You weren't too keen on me running there earlier."

"Of course you're not running home. It's dark out, it's below freezing, and you're exhausted."

Flushing slightly, Sarah looked down at her lap. "Actually, I don't want to go home right now. I know that my dad would come over to the apartment and want to talk to me."

"Sarah, you should know that I always have your best interests at heart. Please don't be upset with me when I say I really think you need to work things out with your dad. But I'm also not sure tonight would be the best time." Pensive, he looked at her. "I think you should stay here so you can warm up. I don't want to take you out again. You're overtired. You could get sick." Letting go of her feet, Matt scooted closer to Sarah and put his arms around her in an effort to help warm her. "I'll sleep on the couch and you can sleep in my bed." He waited for his words to sink in. "I know it seems like a temptation, but we managed in the townhouse for two weeks."

Tensing at first at his proposal, Sarah relaxed when Matt mentioned the separate sleeping arrangements. "It's a good thing your dad isn't here."

"He's not. And you don't have to worry. We made a commitment. Besides, you're exhausted."

"You should take the bed, since you're bigger than me. You'll be miserable out here. I can sleep on the couch."

"Listen, it's warmer in the bed. I don't need to have the blankets and duvet. You do. I'll be fine out here. I have some extra bedding. Besides, I can sleep anywhere."

"That's right. Your Army training. Why sleep on the couch? Just use the bathtub. It has to be dry by now."

"Very funny." Glad she had finally cheered up enough to make a joke, Matt kissed her hair and rested his cheek against her head. He breathed in the scent of her shampoo, relaxing as he held her. They sat quietly like that for several minutes.

Finally Sarah broke the silence. "Matt, would you pray with me? I'm so mixed up about my dad—I still feel wound up inside. I know I upset people…"

"Of course I'll pray with you." He took her hands and bowed his head.

Afterwards Matt grew serious. "Listen, Sarah. I need to ask you to please never run off like that again. I know you did it out of desperation, and you planned to see me, but…" He hesitated, a look of pain in his eyes. "It reminded me of the time Smith had taken you. Only, I was able to follow the car then. Today I had no idea where you were. It was all I could do to hold it together."

Sober now, Sarah pulled back so she could see Matt's face more easily. "I'm so sorry. It was a dumb move. I should have called you. I shouldn't have run so far."

"Well, it's behind us now and I'll stop harping on it. Just please don't do it again."

"I won't."

His own face troubled, Matt watched as Sarah made an effort to hold back tears. "And I like I said, I forgive you. I love you. Very much." He leaned down, his lips meeting hers.

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A noise startled Matt awake. Confused at first, it took him a moment to realize that he was lying on the couch in his apartment. Sarah had gone to sleep in his bed before eight o'clock. He had stayed up working on the reports that he had neglected that week, then checking emails and reading the news on the internet before finally going to sleep around nine-thirty. He listened for the sound to repeat itself. Then he heard a woman's muffled cries of anguish. _Sarah!_ He jumped up and without knocking, went into the bedroom. In the dark, he could see Sarah's form in the bed. Curled into a tight ball, she was still covered, not moving. Then she cried out again.

"Sarah. Sarah, wake up." Matt lowered himself to the side of the bed and began gently shaking her. "Come on, Sweetie. Wake up."

Sarah made another agonized sound, and then opened her eyes. His hand resting reassuringly on her shoulder, Matt watched as she lay staring into the dark, her eyes faintly luminescent from the little moonlight that filtered into the room under the curtains.

"You were having a nightmare."

"Matt?" Confused, Sarah sat up, pulling the blankets up to her chin. "What are you doing here?" She looked around at the dark room. "Oh, that's right."

"Do you want to talk about it, or go back to sleep?"

She pushed the hair off of her face and thought for a moment. "It was the same dream I used to have after we were attacked. Only this time, my dad was there, aiming a gun at me. I wanted to get past him and get to you, but I couldn't."

"Your dad was aiming at the man who wanted to take you away. You were being held with a knife at your throat."

"I remember that part. I could feel blood on my neck, but I didn't care that it hurt. All I could think of was getting to you." A sob escaped Sarah's lips.

"You did. We're okay now. Your dad took care of that monster." Matt reached for her, holding her against him as she rested her head against his chest.

"Oh Matt, I just can't get past the image of my father holding the gun. And I just wanted to get to you, but I couldn't. You were hurt so badly." Great sobs began to shake her body.

"I'm here now, Sarah. It's okay. We're okay." Matt rocked her gently in his arms as she keened.

Matt had not looked at the time when he came into the room, and he could only guess how long he held Sarah like that, speaking softly to her, trying to soothe her, praying silently. Having neglected to grab a robe, he was growing cold wearing only a t-shirt and pajama bottoms. At one point he had reached for the tissue box on the bedside table and left it on the bed beside them so she could help herself. As he ran his hand along her back, Matt could tell that Sarah was chilled as well—she still wore the t-shirt and athletic pants she had dressed in after her shower. Finally she quieted, her breath coming in quiet gasps, and he handed her another tissue. "You need to get some more sleep."

Blowing her nose, Sarah did not acknowledge Matt immediately. Shivering with only the blanket covering her front, she hugged her knees to her chest with one arm while she wiped her face with the tissue.

He sat for a moment, as if he was considering something. Suddenly he stood up and went around to the other side of the bed. Pulling back the covers, he climbed in. "Lie down."

"Um…"

"It's okay. I'm just going to hold you, like I did in the barn. You're never going to get warm again unless I do."

Hesitating at first, Sarah lay down, turning on her side. Matt wrapped an arm around her and tucked himself up against her back. _Oh, she feels good._ He closed his eyes, trying to think of something else so he could go to sleep.

For the first time since that afternoon, Sarah grew comfortably warm. Not just tolerably warm, as she had been on the couch earlier. She lay quietly, listening to Matt's breathing, her own finally back to normal. Rapid at first, his breaths gradually slowed to an even rhythm. His arm grew heavy where it rested on her hip, but as she, too, grew sleepy, she did not mind. The faint scent of his aftershave was comforting, and it gave her a feeling of security to relax against his firm, muscular chest.

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Gingerly, Matt released the weight, doing his best to keep from waking Sarah. It was only five-thirty in the morning. Although it would normally be a little too early for him, he knew they would have to take Sarah to her apartment to change her clothes before they went to work. And he had needed the workout. Sleeping soundly, Sarah had finally felt warm as he left the bed. Despite the harrowing nightmare and troubling memories that had haunted her the day before, Sarah's face had been tranquil, her body relaxed. No longer curled into a fetal position but still attracted to his warmth, she had stretched out against him, her long legs touching his. The enticing fragrance of roses emanated from her soft hair as it tumbled over her face and shoulders and across the pillow. A great physical longing had come over Matt, and it was with tremendous effort that he had resisted kissing and caressing her. In fact, he wasted no time getting out of the bed once he realized how tempted he was. Now he truly understood why the newlywed officers on the base in Belgium had often struggled to make it to the office on time. Lifting weights and running relieved tension of all varieties, and he was definitely feeling tension today.

It was a half hour later that she finally appeared, sleepy and disheveled, in the living room. Raising her voice a little so Matt could hear her over the treadmill, where he was running, she greeted him with a shy smile. "Good morning."

Huffing out his reply, Matt answered, "Good morning. You just woke up?"

"Yes." Finding the sweatshirt that she had discarded before going to bed, Sarah drew it on and curled up on the couch, slipping her feet under the folded blankets Matt had left there. Finally, she looked at the clock on the wall. "Oh. I slept almost eleven hours."

Matt grunted out his responses between breaths. "Yeah. You needed it. Glad I didn't wake you earlier."

"I should probably go freshen up now so I won't keep you from the bathroom. You'll want to get your shower when you're done there."

"Good idea."

Sarah was in the kitchen when Matt made his way to the bedroom after his run. The bed was neatly made, no evidence that she had been there. He paused for a moment, considering what he had done the night before. _How was it any different than any of the other times you've been alone with Sarah? Only this time, you weren't making out with her. It was rather chaste. But we shared a bed._ Shaking his head, as if to clear his mind, Matt grabbed some fresh underwear, a shirt, and his suit pants, then headed to the bathroom.

Breakfast was on the table when Matt came out. "Blueberry pancakes! Mmm. They smell delicious. I'm glad you found the ingredients." He stepped over to the sink, where Sarah was washing the mixing bowl, and gave her a kiss on the cheek before sitting at the table.

"When we packed up the kitchen the other day, I saw you had baking powder. And flour. I'm glad you didn't seal up the box, yet."

"I've made pancakes from scratch a few times. My mom always made them that way when we were growing up."

"I stole the berries from the supply you keep for smoothies." Sarah set the glasses of freshly blended fruit and protein powder on the table and sat quietly while Matt said grace over the food and prayed for Sarah. She watched him for a moment as he began to eat. "I guess you could call this a peace offering, even if it isn't muffins. You were right to be angry with me. And you've been so good to me despite my foolishness."

"You've done the same for me. I've made my own mistakes. But I'll take your peace offering—these are delicious. You can make me muffins next time." Matt grinned and took a bite of pancake, swallowing before he spoke again. "I was thinking I could drive you in today. Then you could take the Charger to your place at the end of the day and I can have Rene drop me off there after work.

"Thanks. It will be nice to drive in together." She looked down at her plate. "I hope people won't think we… um… you know."

"Who?"

"Neighbors. My parents. My brothers, if they knew I stayed here."

"Well, you have a ring on your finger. I don't like to be rude to my neighbors, but as you know, I have to kind of keep to myself. For all they know, we're already married. People can't always see a person's hand clearly."

"Oh. That's why you took my hand last night. It felt strange, because you were so cold and distant."

Matt gazed at Sarah, his expression serious. "I know. I've told you that I wouldn't give you my agent face. But I didn't know how to be angry with you. And I wasn't about to humiliate you in front of my neighbors." His face softened and he appeared remorseful. "But honestly, I didn't take your hand for that reason. I didn't know you were going to stay over. I just didn't want you to run off again."

Sarah looked down at her plate and did not say anything.

After swallowing some more of his smoothie, Matt tipped her chin with his finger, encouraging her to look at him. "As for your family, I told your mom that you were in the bedroom and I was on the couch—which was true for at least part of the night." He smiled ruefully and took another sip. "I texted her last night after you were asleep. I don't think Phillip and Jamie will know. Phillip went home once he knew you were here with me."

"Who else knows about what I did besides Rene?"

"Leatherneck had left already. Just your brothers, your parents, and Rene. I only told Rene that you were missing because I had to leave some reports unfinished. He won't know you slept here."

"Thank you for keeping it private—my foolish behavior."

"Your parents insisted and I agreed with them. But your mom wants you to see Dr. Kirby."

Sighing, Sarah looked down at the remains of her pancakes. "Okay. I hope all this means I'm past it now."

"You didn't tell me you were having nightmares again."

"I've only had few recently."

Matt regarded her for a moment before getting up to take his dishes to the kitchen. "We'd better get on the road." As Sarah joined him at the sink, he took the plate and cup from her, then after putting them down, embraced her. "You'll get past this. We'll do it together. Just keep praying."

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Lee, dressed in a t-shirt and sweatpants, watched from the bedroom window above the driveway as Sarah, now wearing slacks, a warm coat, and boots, walked with Matt to his car. Lee glanced over at Amanda, also in her workout clothes, as she came and stood beside him.

"I've got some coffee ready downstairs. We finished our workout twenty minutes ago. I was wondering if you were going to come down."

He looked out the window again, watching Matt start the car and drive off. "I wanted to see if Sarah was okay. She and Matt hurried up to the apartment earlier, and I couldn't tell."

"She'll be okay, Lee. She just needs time."

"She didn't even come home last night."

"You know it was because Matt didn't want to take her out again in the cold. They didn't…"

Still staring out the window, Lee cut her off. "—She's always talked to us when she's been upset. I've broken our trust."

"Lee, please. Give her some time. I seem to remember you needed space when you came to terms with your parents' death. There were other times when I gave you space as well."

"It wasn't the same."

"But she's your daughter. She often thinks like you do. Give her a chance to work it out. Hopefully she'll see Kirby today."

"Maybe I need to go for a visit, too. I'll give his office a call after we have our coffee."

"And a little something to eat. You'll feel better."

Looking back at his wife, Lee frowned. "You know, I got along just fine for years without eating anything for breakfast."

Amanda wisely did not say anything more as she followed Lee out of the room.

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As Sarah waited in Kirby's office, she thought back to her interaction with Leatherneck that morning. He had been kind, brushing off her breach of protocol with the Glock. Grant Hill had been nowhere to be seen as Leatherneck related the story behind her father's pop-up appearing during her simulation. However, when she had discussed running the simulation again, he had insisted that she would not be in the arena again that week. Jamie needed her help with research with the reports that he was now compiling.

"And you have to visit with Kirby. Your mother told me that if you didn't want to go voluntarily, I was to personally escort you there."

A door opened to the psychiatrist's office. Sarah tensed when she realized her father was the person walking out. Before she could think of a way to avoid him, he had walked up to her.

"Hello, Sarah." Her father, the veteran agent, was always sure of himself. Even when her mother had been taken hostage, he had remained strong for her and her brothers. But now he looked vulnerable. Then the image of him firing his gun came back to her.

Lee was not a believer, but he thought it might have been divine Providence that had his daughter waiting in the office right after his session with Kirby. Then he saw the change in her expression and it felt like a knife had been plunged into his gut.

Sarah had not missed the pained expression on Lee's face. She knew she needed to say something. Her father was struggling with his own feelings. And why was he in Kirby's office? "Hi, Daddy. I'm surprised to see you here."

Although it was tempting to vindicate himself and tell Sarah why he had been coming to Kirby for weeks, Lee refrained. He did not want her pity and he did not want to add guilt to the many emotions that must have been plaguing his daughter.

"Oh, it's just a routine visit. Have to come if I'm going to keep up with the consulting."

Getting up from her chair, Sarah considered going to her father and hugging him. She wanted to talk to him alone and tell him she was confused. But he seemed to be putting up a wall. _Perhaps it's best if I don't tell him what's bothering me after all_. She did not know how to tell him she was angry with him. Or had been until she saw him this morning. "Well, I had better go in for my appointment."

"Okay. I'll see you later."

Sarah smiled and nodded in response.

Lee was momentarily hopeful that things might improve between them. But Sarah had disappeared into Kirby's office before he had a chance to say anything more. And her smile had not been the easy, confident smile he was accustomed to seeing on her face. It was forced. And her eyes, which were just as expressive as Amanda's, were troubled.


	11. Chapter 11

Amanda was waiting with the usual cup of coffee when Lee walked in the door. She pretended to shiver when he kissed her and offered her a quick embrace. "Ooh, you've brought the cold in with you." She frowned when she saw his attempted smile as he removed his coat and went to the foyer to hang it up. She called after him. "I have some coffee here for you."

He came back into the kitchen and took the offered beverage from her.

She went over to the table. "Sit down with me, Stetson. What's on your mind?"

Holding the coffee cup, he stood stiffly in the middle of the kitchen and sighed. "I don't want to drag you into this, Amanda."

"Into what? Is it Sarah? How did your appointment go?"

"I saw Sarah when I came out. I thought maybe things were going to be okay between us. But she's put up a wall."

"She has, or you have?"

"What do you mean? I said hello first." Amanda watched as the emotions passed over Lee's face. At first defensive, he now looked pained. "If you could have seen her expression…" Lee passed a hand over his eyes.

Getting up from her chair, Amanda went to Lee and put her arms around him. "Just give her some time, Lee. She loves you. You two are closer than most other fathers and daughters I know. You'll work it out."

While he had seemed to welcome the embrace at first, his body stiffened while she spoke. "This isn't something most other fathers and daughters have to deal with, Amanda." He stepped away. "I think I'll go work on that security proposal. I need to get it done before Christmas."

"I thought you needed my help. I'm free this afternoon. Jennifer is picking up the boys early from school, so we won't have our usual lunch date."

"Christmas break already?" Lee seemed to grow almost wistful, and then shook himself. "I'm putting together a few things, but then I was hoping you could review them. Maybe I'll have enough ready after lunch."

Amanda watched as he went up the steps towards the foyer and his office beyond. She knew that what Lee really wanted was to be alone.

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Listening to Leatherneck's instructions over the headset, Sarah maneuvered the Agency vehicle towards the still icy practice track. Things had been quiet at the Agency that day. Having finished the work that Jamie had left for her, she had walked down to Leatherneck's office near the armory after lunch on her own. As a former quartermaster for years prior to being in charge of field communications, Leatherneck often had the veteran agents coming in for visits when his door was open. But the office had been empty save for the now partially-retired Agency veteran, who seemed happy to see her.

"You have work to do with your brother, don't you, Junior?"

"Hello to you, too, Leatherneck."

"Hi. You on a break?"

"Yes. No. I'm done for the day."

"Your fiancé was in the armory with his partner, getting ready to be recertified on weapons and other equipment, I heard. They'll probably be down here all day. Barclay's crazy notion to surprise people, instead of schedule the things."

"Yes, but it forces people to be on their game, as Matt says. I guess I can't practice on the range today. But I feel guilty not doing anything when I'm getting paid."

"At intern's wages. But this would be a good day to go to the track. You up for it?"

"Yes. But it's icy out there, Leatherneck. I rode the train in. It was crazy just getting to the station in my car."

"You could have stayed home. Jamie did. But then you probably wanted to be with your honey. Only he's got this surprise recert."

"Stop teasing," she admonished him. But she was only partially kidding. Sarah would not say that the real reason for coming in on a weather day was so she could avoid her father. Soon she and Leatherneck and driven off to the track.

Sarah came back to the present once she had brought the Agency car near the cones. It was time to focus.

Leatherneck spoke over the headset. "I called your dad to join us. First, he told me off for taking you out in this weather. Then, I told him that I was preventing you from having an accident in the future, not endangering your life."

"I'm sure that helped a ton." Sarah was sarcastic. After Lee's actions of the week before, when she and her mother had been late because of the accident, she imagined that he was now irritated with her for going to the track and driving to the metro station on the ice.

"Actually, he cooled off some. But when I invited him to join us, he declined. And he said he wouldn't come tomorrow, either." Leatherneck was silent on his end, waiting for Sarah's response. When it did not come, he continued. "I don't know what's going on between you two, but you need to work it out. You're getting married in two weeks. It's almost Christmas."

"My mother made Daddy call to invite Matt and me over for dinner tonight. But we're signing the papers on our apartment, so we can't go. I think he thought I'm avoiding him."

"You guys have to eat." Silence. "So go eat with your parents."

"I thought we came to drive on ice."

"As in, I'm on thin ice?"

Sarah started driving, tired of Leatherneck's unsolicited advice. Her mind went back to the night before. Matt had wanted to eat at her parents' house. They had not argued, but it had come close.

"Matt, I just can't be around my dad right now. He won't talk to me, anyway."

"Sarah, it's Christmas—or almost Christmas. This may be the last time we can be alone with your folks before the wedding. It won't be the same for you or for them once we're married. Ever since we've met we've had these dinners. You'd help your mom, I'd drive over—you won't be helping her host anymore."

"We can drive over there."

"Think of your mom, at least, Sarah. Didn't you tell me that your mom wanted to do another fitting with the dress today?"

"Please, Matt. Don't pressure me."

Matt had been quiet after that. Sarah had felt a wall go up between them and she knew it was her fault. It had not been long before Matt had gone home for the night. He had seemed as frustrated and disappointed with their evening as she had. _I shouldn't let this thing with my father come between me and Matt. And I should think of Mom_. She stopped daydreaming and brought her mind back to the present once again.

"You're right, Leatherneck. I'll leave here early and go help my mom make dinner."

"Since all you're doing is driving in circles, we can call it quits now and I'll drive you there. You don't have a car at the Agency."

"Okay. But let's do some turns first. What's a bootlegger like on ice?"

"Ha ha, Junior. Let's start with easy stuff. And tomorrow your dad is joining us. You're inviting him."

"Um."

"No arguments. Let's go. Start with the cones. I don't need to remind you what to do if you fishtail."

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When Matt arrived at the Stetson home that evening, he was pleased to see that Sarah greeted him at the door. "Hey. Missed you today." He leaned down to kiss her as soon as the front door was closed.

Sarah was glad to see that the wall between them had come back down. "Missed you, too." She moved around behind him to help him with his coat. "You are cold."

"It's getting better out there—starting to warm up a little. Won't be icy when we drive over to the apartment." He gave her a quick hug after she hung up his coat. He took the opportunity to whisper in her ear. "I'm really glad you wanted to have dinner here after all. How are things with your dad?"

"Haven't seen him. He's working in his office. You know he's doing some freelance stuff. Security work. Gil Barclay gave him the referral. Mom is helping him. Only…" Sarah drew Matt into the living room, away from the foyer. "…she said he didn't have much for her to do today. He's being a loner. And it's my fault." She looked at Matt, sorrow on her face.

"Did you try talking to him? Knock on the door?"

"When I first got here I knocked on the door and he said hello. Asked if we could talk later. But that was two or three hours ago. He wouldn't even come up to see me in the wedding dress." Sarah bit her lip. "I can't help it, Matt. Even though I talked with Dr. Kirby yesterday, he wasn't much help. I'm not as torn anymore, but I still feel uncomfortable around my dad. And I keep remembering what happened. It's hard to put it from my mind. It's upsetting."

"It's only been a couple of days."

"Dr. Kirby said it was like I just lived it, since I hadn't remembered the entire incident until now."

"Yeah. I figured it was something like that. That means you'll get better with time, right?"

"Yes."

"Then hopefully your dad will get better soon, too."

Amanda walked into the foyer. Seeing her, Matt and Sarah spoke as they joined her from the darkened living room.

"Hi, Amanda."

"Hey, Mom."

"I didn't want to intrude…"

"You weren't. We were just talking."

Amanda hugged Matt. She nodded at them both, a smirk on her face. "I wasn't born yesterday. But you can call it talking if you like."

"Oh, Mom." Sarah found herself blushing, despite Amanda's misperception. Matt had disappeared.

"You only call me 'Mom' in that tone when you're embarrassed."

"Because you made something out of nothing. We were talking. Matt kissed me in the foyer." She pulled her mother into the den. "It was about Daddy." She widened her eyes at Amanda.

Amanda looked past her daughter's shoulder. Sarah turned to see Matt following her father into the den. Matt's eyes met Sarah's, trying to encourage her.

"I thought I should call it quits since Matt is here and dinner must be almost ready." Lee looked at Amanda, avoiding eye contact with Sarah.

"Leatherneck took me out to the track today, Daddy."

"I heard about that. He's going to get you killed."

Despite her father's gruff tone, Sarah pressed on. "He was using the opportunity to show me how to drive safely on ice. He even had me do a few maneuvers at increased speed, but no bootlegger turns." Sarah was uncomfortable.

Standing behind Lee, Matt looked down at the floor briefly, then back at Sarah, trying to encourage her wordlessly. He walked around Lee to the kitchen and began helping Amanda.

Left alone in the den with her father, Sarah knew she should take the opportunity to extend Leatherneck's invitation. "He asked you to come out to the track tomorrow, Daddy. It's Friday. It will probably be my last time before I officially sign on. You won't be able to drive along with me anymore."

"I suppose I should show up, then, huh? You won't mind?"

"No. Of course not." She tried to smile encouragingly, and then looked towards the kitchen. "I should help Mom. We have our appointment at the apartment complex this evening."

"I'll pour some wine. That okay?"

"Yes, thanks." Sarah was miserable. Things were so stilted between her and Lee that she felt as if she did not know the man. Despite everyone's reassurance, including her mother's, that things would get better, she was not feeling confident of that at the moment. The small lunch she had eaten in the breakroom at the Agency was long forgotten as her empty stomach churned from stress.

Later, Matt regarded her with concern as they drove to the apartment complex. "You okay?"

"I guess so. It's just so hard to talk to Daddy. He's like a stranger." She felt her lower lip wobble. _Don't cry. You'll be a mess for the meeting._

Glancing over at hearing the catch in Sarah's voice, Matt saw her expression and took her hand. "Oh, Sweetie. Hang in there. At least he talked with you."

"Before dinner. I couldn't say a thing after that."

"You were pretty quiet. And you didn't eat well. Good thing your mom served bread with dinner."

"You have me figured out." _Good thing Matt doesn't know how much Mom is having to alter the dress._ She cringed inwardly, remembering how her mother had been concerned about her weight loss.

"Seems like you must have a sour stomach…"

"I just get stressed out, and my stomach goes into knots. It helps to eat the bread. I ate some of the roast and vegetables."

Matt chose not to argue over the quantity of food she had eaten. "So is your dad going to meet you at the track?"

"He said he would."

"Great! That's a start."

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"Come to bed, Lee."

He did not look up from the computer as he replied. "I'll be up in a while. I'm on a roll, here."

Amanda sighed. "Sarah's trying, Lee. But you're so wound up you're intimidating her. She could hardly eat dinner."

"She's right. I'm a lousy father. I shot at her. Now I'm making her miserable."

"Lee. You saved her from Santiago. You helped her take care of Matt. You were with her during one of the most painful moments of her life. You've been there for her through all sorts of ups and downs. Protecting her from everything—from real evil to overly hormonal teenage boys. You're a wonderful father. She knows that. She's just struggling with her emotions." She chose not to tell Lee about her concern over Sarah's weight loss.

Lee turned around to face his wife and looked over his reading glasses at her. "Amanda, I know you're trying to be helpful, but I haven't been a wonderful father. Not always. I worked late a lot of nights. She wasted years with Jeff—I have wondered if she turned to him, a man she didn't really love, because I wasn't available." Lee ran a hand through his hair as Amanda stood there, listening.

"There were times she'd call and I couldn't take the time to talk for more than a minute or two. She was just a girl still, not even out of her teens, at a school far from home and she needed her father. No wonder she found that guy. He filled the gap. And he wasn't very hard to string along—no stress, because he didn't ask for anything. Not until he got serious. Then she finally woke up and dumped him. Thank God." He laughed mirthlessly.

"Lee, you can't blame yourself entirely for that. And there were plenty of times she talked with both of us. She's told me that she spent more time with us, with the family, the last two years of her relationship with Jeff, if you can even call it that, than with him. It was over when they came back here. She just didn't know how to tell him." She pulled up a chair and sat down near Lee. "Why are we even talking about Jeff?"

"I guess I haven't been working the entire time I've been in here, the last couple of days. I've just been trying to think about how I could have done things differently. Analyzing where I've screwed up."

"Oh, that's a bad road to go down…"

"Is it? My daughter is terrified of me."

"She's not terrified. Just confused. And upset. She'll be okay. I keep trying to tell you. I felt like this many times when we first worked together and you'd be pushing me away."

"I was too much of an ass to realize I cared for you. Then I felt guilty dragging you into a dangerous business."

"But she's younger than I was. It's harder for her to understand that you're struggling with guilt. And you two are so alike, she can't really see that what you're doing is a overreacting. Because she is, too."

"You think I'm overreacting." It was more of a statement than a question.

Amanda was grateful that he did not become angry.

Lee stared at her, not really seeing Amanda for a few moments while he processed her words. "Well, I'm going to the track tomorrow."

"Good. Now come to bed."

"I said I wasn't done."

"You also said you weren't really working."

He eyed her, then turned to the computer and shut it down. "Mrs. Stetson, you are a stubborn woman."

"Yeah, I am." Years ago she might have pointed out his own stubbornness, but she kept her thoughts to herself.

He drew her up out of her chair. "And I love you anyway. Always have. Let's go to bed." Ignoring Amanda as she rolled her eyes at him, he kissed her forehead before following her out of the office.

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Easing her car into the lane of traffic she wanted, Sarah adjusted the radio volume so the music was on low. Jamie would be in the office today, so he was expecting her to work with him that morning. Leatherneck had scheduled her for the track after lunch, where her father would join them. Choosing not to dwell on the state of her relationship with her father, she focused on her plans for that evening.

Old clothes, cleaning supplies, and other items were stowed in the trunk of her Volvo, as she would be going to the new apartment after work. Matt would join her there, along with Rene and his wife, Patti.

The apartment, really a townhouse, was everything they had hoped for. While the managers had only been able to show them floor plans when they put their names on the waiting list six weeks earlier, Sarah and Matt had imagined it would be much roomier than Matt's apartment. But the living room of their new three-level townhouse was much larger, as was the master bedroom. And the second bedroom, which would serve as their exercise room, was just spacious enough to include a pull-out sofa and still have room for the weight machine and treadmill. Guests would have their own bathroom, so Matt's family or friends could come to stay with them. There was even a small, loft-like living area looking out over the living room that could serve as an office.

Sarah smiled at the prospect of running inside on icy days. It had been tempting to forego her workouts on those days, but she had been a runner for so long it was hard to miss more than the one day a week she allowed for rest.

Red lights glowed in front of her as the traffic slowed to a crawl. She was looking forward to the shorter commute, too. It was only fifteen minutes closer, more in traffic, than her parents' house, but with the traffic often bumper to bumper, that saved time would be a luxury.

The meeting at the management office had seemed to drag on, but once they had finished signing the papers and handing over their deposit and rent money, the apartment manager walked them through the townhouse for an inspection, and then handed them the keys. After she left, Matt and Sarah wasted no time going back inside.

Entering their new front door, Matt let Sarah go ahead of him. "I can't carry you over the threshold until we're married. You'll have to walk in until then." When Sarah laughed, he continued, "You think I'm joking. It might be an old-fashioned tradition, but I'm carrying you over the threshold in two weeks."

"Three weeks. We won't come here until we're back from the honeymoon." By then they were inside and up the stairs. Matt watched as she wandered around the living room, this time at her own, unhurried pace, before standing in front of him again. "You know, it's perfect."

Without hesitating, Matt wrapped his arms around his fiancée. His kiss was not one Sarah would forget easily. "Our first home together, Beloved." As his eyes held hers for a moment, the intensity of his expression was not lost on her.

This time it was Sarah who kissed Matt. "I love you, Matthew Granger."

He held her tightly for a few moments, then pulled away with a sigh. "This is nice, but let's look around again. We need to decide where to put the furniture."

Sarah realized she had been distracted far too long—not a good thing in the morning traffic. Smiling to herself over the memory of the evening before, she focused her attention on the road.

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In her fourth lap at the track, bypassing the cones each time, Sarah glanced at the gate as she drove by and sighed. "I think I'm warmed up now, Leatherneck. I guess my dad isn't coming. I had better get started."

"Spoke too soon, Junior. He's just pulling up."

Leatherneck waited for Lee to join him at his vantage point on one of the observation platforms. He noted his friend's reserved behavior. "Glad you could make it, Ace."

Lee did not say that he had driven around the area for twenty minutes, debating whether to come at all. He knew he was in for a lecture if he declined to ride with Sarah, but he pretended not to see Leatherneck offering him the headset.

"She's waited for you." He pointed with the headset. "This was all about letting her practice those moves you showed her."

Lee took the headset and placed it on his head, but remained standing in the same place.

As if sensing that Lee had no intention of joining her, Sarah pressed on the accelerator and began negotiating her way through the cones at a rapid rate of speed.

Leatherneck, looked at Lee, then back at the track. He made sure the mic on his headset was off. "You two need to work things out."

They both watched Sarah as she completed the first lap.

Lee's face grew concerned. "Are you timing her? She acts like she's trying to break a record."

"No doubt she's ticked off about something. She reminds me of a certain agent back in the day."

Lee was no longer watching from the back of the observation room. He was at the windows, a pained expression on his face. He breathed a sigh of relief when Sarah came to a stop once again.

"Nice work, Sarah, except Wong will write you up if you drive like that during one of his sessions." Leatherneck's voice was uncharacteristically stern.

There was silence for a few moments. The two men watched as the car idled. Finally Sarah's voice came over the headsets. "Shall I go again?"

"Yes, but this time more slowly. Then we'll work on your turns."

Lee relaxed and took a step back from the window. He made sure his mic was still off. "You're wrong, you know. She's acting just like her mother—she's not flying off the handle. She was sending me a message. I blew it."


	12. Chapter 12

Pulling off her gloves, Sarah was tossing them in the box of cleaning supplies she had brought to the master bedroom when she heard a key in the lock downstairs.

"Hello dear. I'm home." She could hear Matt chuckle to himself as she went to the stairs, where he met her at the landing. He had changed into jeans and a sweatshirt before coming to the townhouse.

"Hello. I never knew you could be so corny." Standing one step above the landing where Matt now stood, she wrapped her arms around his neck and planted a kiss on his lips. "But it was cute."

"And I'm enjoying finding you here." He closed his eyes as she ran her hands through his hair and kissed him again. "Mmm. This is nice." He opened his eyes again and stepped back, sighing heavily as he did so.

Sarah smiled sheepishly. "Sorry."

He ran his hand along her arm in a silent gesture, as if to say it was alright. "How did it go at the track today?"

Sarah did not answer right away, but Matt stood patiently, waiting for her answer. Finally she said, "Okay."

"Just okay?" Matt looked in Sarah's eyes, which were telling him a different story.

"Daddy was late. Then he wouldn't ride with me. And to be honest, I was relieved." She bit her lip and gazed out the window above the landing, where she could see the greenbelt behind their townhouse.

"Oh." He ran his hand along her arm again, as if he was thinking of a way to respond. He knew that today had probably been the last time Lee could ride along with Sarah before she began her formal training. "How did you do?"

"I nailed it. Both times. And I did a few bootlegger's turns, too." She reached up to rub her neck.

Matt turned her around and started massaging her neck and shoulders. "It's a nice trick to use in the rare car chase, but it's not very kind to the neck, is it?"

"No." She made a little sound of contentment. "That feels good." After a moment she continued, "And I guess I wasn't very kind to my dad. I left before he could come down and talk to me."

"Oh, Sweetie…" Matt kept working the muscles in her shoulders, hoping she would say more.

"But he was late. And he didn't come down to get in the car with me."

"Did you give him a chance?"

Sarah was silent. When she did answer Matt, she spoke in a small voice. "Not really. I kind of let him know I was mad."

Turning her around once again, Matt's eyes met hers. "It might be good to cut your dad some slack, Sarah. You love each other. He's got a lot on his mind. You moving out, getting married. Then this whole mess with the depositions. He may be a veteran agent, but anyone would be unnerved by Teresa Sandoval."

Sarah's mouth tipped when Matt pretended to shudder at his last remark. "I guess I can't argue with you."

He put his hands on her waist. "And you've been under a lot of pressure."

Sarah looked out the window again. "I guess."

It was time to change the subject. "I brought over a couple of the kitchen boxes with the dolly. Can I help you finish up here? Rene and Patti will be coming to my old apartment soon."

"I'm all done. I figured Patti might not mind helping me wipe down the kitchen before we unpack. And we can be here for the washer and dryer set up."

"Great—the store said they'd be here between seven and nine." He held up a tape measure that he had retrieved from his pocket. "Before we leave I was hoping you could help me measure the room for the exercise equipment. It's heavy, so I want to have it all laid out for the guys."

"Guys? I thought it was just Rene and Patti."

"Patti said she'd help move boxes and light stuff. Johnson and Gonzales offered to help move the big furniture and the equipment tonight with Rene and me. We won't have to do as much tomorrow."

"But where will you sleep tonight, if we move your bed?"

"In a sleeping bag at the old place. I stripped the bed before I came over, so we can move it. You and Patti have enough to do without moving the food over, too."

"Okay. Let's go measure the room."

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Having said goodbye to the two appliance installers from the home improvement store, Sarah climbed the stairs and went to the kitchen. Patti Enriquez was busy wiping out the refrigerator with a soapy cloth.

"Thanks for doing that, Patti. But it's long past eight o'clock and you already helped me carry over those boxes."

"That's what I'm here for. It's no trouble. The place was pretty clean. This is easy after lugging those boxes up the stairs."

"I hope you don't think I'm OCD about the cleaning."

"Of course not. I'd do the same thing. Now you'll know it really is clean when you move the food over tomorrow." She went to the sink to rinse the rag. "I'll finish up here, then help you unpack the kitchen stuff before we go."

"Oh, would you? I don't think it will take very long. I already know where everything will go." Sarah went to the cooler and took out a few sodas. "I'll take these to the guys."

She was nearing the base of the stairs when she heard Ryan Johnson's voice.

"So I guess that intern of Leatherneck's really blew it the other day."

Sarah heard Matt respond, but she could not make out the words.

"We heard about it when we went for our recerts. Cheap trick, having her dad pop up like that with a gun in his hand. But I have to say, I laughed when I got that one during my training. We all knew who the chief was, so only an idiot would have fired on him."

"Shut up, Johnson." Sarah thought that was Rene hissing out the words.

"I heard Sarah was pretty upset, Granger." That was Gonzales's voice.

Metal clanked on metal. It sounded like they were putting the weights into place. She could not hear Matt's response.

Sarah had frozen on the stairs. She could not go into the room. She was embarrassed that the men she would be working with knew what had happened. And she was too upset to go back to where Patti worked in the kitchen.

Just then Matt came out of the exercise room. Seeing her, he hurried up to where she stood. "Let me take those drinks from you, Sweetie." She had to strain her ears to hear his quiet voice over the noise the men were making with the equipment.

She wondered if he was trying to keep her presence hidden from the men in the exercise room. She whispered to him. "I heard, Matt."

"Oh. I was hoping you hadn't."

"You didn't tell me that Grant Hill was spreading rumors about me. Do they know I ran off?"

"We don't know for sure he was spreading rumors. He may have told just one person—he was feeling pretty badly about the whole thing. And no one knows what you did or where you went afterwards. They only know you were upset."

Sarah looked in Matt's face, uncertain.

His expression was reassuring. "Come on in the room with me. You can help me hand out sodas and visit with the guys while they take a break."

When Sarah hesitated, Matt pushed further. "The longer you put this off, the harder it will be to face them. I'll be right there with you."

"You're right."

Sarah straightened her shoulders as she followed Matt down the stairs and into the exercise room.

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Sarah and Patti were stacking the last of the flattened boxes from the kitchen items when Matt and Rene came upstairs. It was nearly ten o'clock.

"Well, Bro, you're mostly moved in."

"Still have some things to bring over with the dolly. Mostly books, that sort of thing."

"Great idea to take Gonzales and Johnson up on their offer to help. Moved your furniture and set up the exercise equipment in four hours."

"It always helps to feed people pizza and beer beforehand."

"And stop the beer before they drink too much."

"You figured me out." Matt grinned at Rene.

Rene waited for Sarah to finish with the boxes so he could have her attention. "Hey, Sarah. I'm betting you overheard the guys talking about the arena—the thing with your dad."

Sarah put her hands in her back pockets and wrinkled her forehead. "What makes you say that?"

"You're a lousy liar. You need lessons if you're going to be an agent."

"Gee, I thought you were my friend."

Matt stepped behind Sarah and put his hands on her shoulders, but he remained silent.

"The hands in the pockets—dead giveaway. You never do that unless you're nervous. Besides, I asked Matt if you had heard us. I tried to get those two to can it."

Sarah frowned and did not say anything.

Rene pressed on. "I just want you to know that no one blames you for being upset about the pop-up. And no one knows what happened next except that you left the arena. If anything, they're going to give grief to Hill. God bless the kid if he ends up becoming an agent. He'll never live it down."

"He seems nice enough." Sarah shrugged. "I'm not holding a grudge."

"Leatherneck was taking the blame. In the end, it doesn't really matter. It was a mistake."

"Rene, they have another long day tomorrow. We should go." Patti went to her husband and put a hand on his arm.

"Right. You sure you don't need any help tomorrow, Granger?"

"I think we have it covered. You guys were great tonight."

"Yes. Patti, you were a lifesaver. I really appreciate your help. Thanks so much for working on the kitchen while the appliance guys were here. I probably should have asked them to come tomorrow."

"Well, now you can wash stuff tomorrow if you need to—like those rags I left in the kitchen. I think it was a great idea. No more hauling stuff to the laundry room in who knows what kind of weather." She finished shrugging on her jacket and pulling on her gloves. "It was a nice night for all of this. You two should have good weather for traipsing back and forth tomorrow."

"Yeah. Too bad we probably won't have time for a run." Matt took Sarah's hand as they followed the Enriquezes down the stairs.

"Well, see you on Wednesday, Granger. Have fun backing up all the other lucky fools who have to work over Christmas."

"Thanks, friend."

Rene did not miss Matt's sarcastic tone. "Oh, I don't feel badly for you. You're going on a honeymoon in a couple of weeks."

Patti's eyes widened and she cast a look of apology at Sarah, who was blushing. "Out. Now." She put her hands on her husband's back and playfully pushed him out the door.

Once the door was closed, Matt turned to Sarah and wrapped his arms around her. She leaned into him and sighed.

"You must be exhausted. You started before I did and I'm tired. The thought ran through my mind to have you curl up on the bed here, but I might be tempted to stay here with you instead of going to that sleeping bag at the old apartment."

Yawning first, she spoke into his chest. "Oh, you'd be safe with me. I'd fall asleep before you could try anything." She pulled back and looked up at him. "You worked hard, too. You guys had all that furniture moved in a little over an hour and a half."

"Well, there isn't that much furniture. Thankfully that pull-out sofa for the exercise room won't be here until Monday. It was nice having four of us—dismantling and reassembling the weight machine takes forever with just one or two people." He took her hand and led her upstairs so she could get her purse and jacket. "You need to go home and get some sleep. Don't rush over here in the morning, either."

"Two weeks from now we'll be saying good night and going our separate ways for the last time." Sarah perked up a little at the thought. While she had been yawning a few moments earlier, she was more awake now. "Two weeks is really a short time, when you think about it."

Matt noticed how her eyes were shining and took a deep breath.

Noticing his reaction, Sarah zipped up her jacket and grabbed her purse. She gave Matt a quick kiss on the lips before they walked back down to the garage.

Matt locked the front door and set the alarm before they went into the garage.

"See you tomorrow, my love. I'd give you a ride, but you could probably be over at your old building in the same amount of time it would take me to drive there." She opened the door of her car.

"That's fine. I love you."

"Love you, too."

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Standing in the doorway of their room, Lee watched Amanda's sleeping form. They had argued that evening, and he knew it was his fault.

Amanda had not said anything when Lee got back from the track. Sensing his mood, she had left him alone and he had spent the rest of the afternoon in his office. As they washed the dishes together after dinner, Amanda had tried to start a conversation.

"I thought I'd go over to see Sarah and Matt's townhouse tomorrow. They could probably use some help. When I called, she said that they still had Matt's clothes and the food at his old apartment. I thought I could help clean it, bring them some breakfast."

"You have enough on your plate, Amanda. I've got the proposals for you to edit, and that dress needs alterations. Plus Christmas is coming."

Amanda had looked at Lee in shock. "Those reports will take me all of an hour to finalize. I worked on the dress today. Christmas is under control. This is not about all of that." Angry at her husband now, she began scrubbing the counters in earnest.

"Oh Amanda. They probably just want to be alone, anyway."

"They could use our support. We've haven't seen their townhouse. This is important. Sarah's been so stressed out, Lee." Amanda put her hands on her hips and did her best to keep the anger from her voice.

Lee hung up the dish towel. "Since you put it that way, I shouldn't go, anyway. I'll just make her more stressed out. Have a good time. I'll finish editing the proposals on my own."

"No one is going to read them now. You already submitted the drafts. You can take Saturday off. I thought the whole purpose of this consulting business was to keep us from working crazy hours. Now you're using it as an excuse to avoid your daughter."

The truth of his wife's words stung. "Low blow, Mrs. King."

The use of her old code name, the name from her previous marriage, hit Amanda like a kick to the stomach. It had been a matter of pride for Lee when people at the Agency had finally known she had become Amanda Stetson. But now he had used her former name as a weapon. "If you meant that to hurt me, it worked." Swiping at a tear, Amanda had pushed past Lee and went upstairs.

He knew he should have gone after her, but instead he went to his office. In no mood to look at the computer, he wandered to the shelves on the wall. His eyes fell on the photo Amanda had taken at the state track championships years earlier. Although Sarah had competed with a fever, she had still managed to have a good showing, and proudly displayed her medal. Lee remembered the elation and pride he had felt that Sarah had done her best, despite the circumstances.

Frowning, he felt the doubt creep into his thoughts. _But were you too hard on her?_ A memory niggled at the back of Lee's mind. He had been the one to try to stop Sarah from going. He had thought it was not worth risking her health. But as was typical, he had trouble standing up to one of his women, and with Amanda backing Sarah, he had never had a chance. _Amanda was right—it was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity._ It wasn't a serious illness, and she didn't make it the next year.

He knew Amanda was right this time, too. She always was. He was avoiding Sarah. _There hasn't been enough time with her so close by. I missed so much over the years. _There were other photos on the shelves, some of just Lee and Sarah, others with Amanda, too, and still others with Phillip and Jamie and their families. The newest frame held a photo of Lee and Amanda with Sarah and Matt. They were so happy there. Lee remembered how proud he had been that his daughter, at such a young age, had helped put together an exhibit at a Smithsonian museum—an exhibit that opened with a Washington gala. _Could it really have been the night before it happened?_ Lee wondered at Amanda placing the visual reminder on the bookshelf.

But should that important event in his daughter's life be marred by or forgotten because of the attack that happened the next day? Sarah was safe. Matt had not only survived, but he was fit once again. Amanda had said at one point that she was grateful Lee had the wherewithal and the aim that allowed him to kill Luis Santiago before he could take Sarah away or hurt her with the knife.

His eyes went to the oldest frame on the shelf. The one that held a photo of Lee with his parents, Matthew and Jennifer Stetson. Without photos, he wondered if he would have been able to remember what they looked like. His memories were only bits and pieces. Some of them poignant, others only vague recollections. He had been so young—only five—when they died. He had spent most of his growing up years in the care of a bachelor uncle who was sparing in his encouragement and affection. While they had reconciled—mostly because of Amanda's influence—Lee had always felt cheated out of having a decent childhood.

That anger had been pushed below the surface for the most part, but it had led to many years of shallow relationships with women. He had been a loner until he had met Amanda. Rejecting her at first, he slowly came to appreciate the stability and love she had to offer him. And once he had had the sense to marry her, they had been blessed with a beautiful daughter. A child of his own. Someone who loved him unconditionally. Phillip and Jamie were like his own sons, especially since their father, Joe King, was no longer alive. But it was not the same.

But did she love him unconditionally anymore? The vision of her with that expression on her face—almost like revulsion—outside Kirby's office haunted Lee. As did the remembrance of Sarah's cry of anguish at the arena. Yet, she had asked him to come to the track. She had driven off before he could come down to get in the car with her, but that had been his fault. He had hesitated. _You've hurt her, Stetson. Just like you hurt your wife tonight._

Finally Lee had switched off the lights in his office and climbed the stairs to the bedroom he shared with Amanda. In their twenty-five years of marriage, they had had their fights. Both were strong-willed. But over time they had learned when to choose their battles. And they both had learned that making up was one of the pleasures of married life.

Now, as he stood in the doorway of their room, Lee knew he needed to apologize to his wife. And he would have to hope that she could forgive him. _Amanda was right, and that "Mrs. King" dig was an idiotic move, Stetson._

"Lee? Are you coming to bed, or are you just going to stare at me all night?"

He started, surprised to hear her voice. "I thought you were asleep." He stepped over to the bed, barely avoiding a box on the floor by the doorway, and sat down near her.

"I was waiting for you."

"I'm so sorry, Amanda. That was a stupid thing to say to you. I don't even want to repeat the words. Please forgive me."

"I forgive you."

"You were right, as usual. I owe our daughter an apology, too. I've let my fears and insecurities kill her joy. She's found someone—I should be happy that she hasn't followed in my footsteps, wasting some of her best years on meaningless relationships."

Amanda sat up. "Don't say anything you'll regret later. I've heard your take on the Jeff relationship too many times."

"That wasn't meaningless. They were friends. I'm just glad she finally realized that's all it was. Although I'll always hold it against him that he hardly ever came to the house."

"I will admit that was pretty frustrating for me, too. But now you have Matt."

"Who came to the house, intimidated as hell, to hear our crazy story of how we met. Then he came back again to ask permission to date Sarah."

"You were smitten." Amanda reached out to caress Lee's cheek.

The corners of his mouth tipped, revealing the dimple on his cheek. "Yeah. I have to say he had no trouble impressing me after that. No wonder he received honors in Afghanistan. It must have been a piece of cake to face the Taliban, compared to facing me."

The darkened room was briefly illuminated by the flash of headlights as a car pulled into the driveway. Lee got up and went to the window so he could watch Sarah go up to her apartment.

Amanda continued the conversation. "No one is saying you won't still be her daddy. They'll still come for dinner. We can go there. We can go out and have fun together at a movie or something once in a while. And you can still keep an eye on her at the Agency."

"You think I'm hovering."

"No. It's dark out, it's going on eleven, and you're just being a caring father, making sure she made it inside okay. I only got to enjoy that until I was sixteen."

"I know it." Lee walked back to Amanda. Sitting back down beside her, he held her against him and kissed the top of her head. "I never thought I'd even have kids."

She wrapped her arms around his waist. "And I never thought I'd get to have a daughter. I love you, Lee."

"I love you, too, Amanda." He kissed her forehead this time.

"Get ready for bed. We have to be up early if we're going to share breakfast tacos with the future Mr. and Mrs. Granger."

"Yes, Ma'am." Lee kissed her on the mouth and ran his hand down Amanda's back.

She responded with a gentle swat on his backside as he stood up.

He grinned as he took out his toothbrush. _Making up is definitely one of the perks of marriage._

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Breakfast at the townhouse had not been everything Amanda had hoped for, but she was grateful that Lee had joined them. Sarah had been tense, but in an effort to appease both Matt's and her mother's concerns about her weight, she had eaten two of the breakfast tacos Amanda had brought.

After getting a tour of the townhouse and helping to bring the last of the boxes from Matt's apartment, Lee had driven off, saying he would be back with lunch.

As Sarah began to place the perishable food items from Matt's apartment in the townhouse refrigerator, Amanda had stopped her.

"Why don't you let me do that? I can remember how Matt had the old fridge set up."

Sarah turned to another box. "Sure. I can set up the pantry."

Amanda stepped over and took her daughter's hand. "Actually, I was hoping you'd take a few minutes to look at something." She led her over to a box that Sarah had not seen before.

"What's this?"

"It's something I had your father bring over. He really wants to make things right between you, but we agreed it might be helpful if you took a look at the things in this box, first."

"Mom, we still have to clean Matt's apartment. He'll be done putting away his clothes soon."

"It won't take long." Amanda went back to the kitchen and set to work.

Sitting down on the couch beside the box, Sarah reached in and pulled out a photo album. "What's this? I haven't seen it on the shelf in the den."

"It's your own album. I put it together over the years when I had snatches of time—then polished it up during the last couple of months. You need your own set of keepsakes, now that you're getting married."

"Oh, Mom. I don't know how to thank you." Sarah was speechless. She unwrapped some of the items that had been placed in the box with the album. Some of Dotty's teacups, a favorite measuring cup of her grandmother's, and framed photos from the apartment were in the box, along with a few other treasured items.

"Now I know what happened to those framed photos in Grandma's apartment. They disappeared this week."

"I wanted you to have them. Your father and I have our own set of photos, as do your brothers."

Poring over the pages of the album, Sarah saw that it was a chronological story of her parents, grandparents, and then her own life. Many of the photos she had seen before, but never together in one place. She was struck by the few photos of her father and his parents, then the marked absence of her Grandpa West as her mother had grown into her late teens. Amanda had been only sixteen when Grandpa West had died. She spoke up a little so her mother could hear her above the noises she was making in the kitchen. "I remember thinking you were the most beautiful mother in the world, Mom. You were a pretty teenager, too." _But there's sadness in your eyes here, Mom._ Sarah tried to imagine living the past several years without her father and felt her throat constrict at the thought.

"Oh, now. All little girls think that about their mothers."

"You still are beautiful, Mom."

She took a moment to look at the photos of her father with his parents. "Daddy was a happy-looking little boy. His parents seem so sweet with him."

"I wish I could have met your grandparents." Amanda looked wistfully at her daughter before turning back to the refrigerator.

Aside from a few photos of her father at special events such as his high school graduation and a birthday party or two, there was little to document his later childhood years. Even the Colonel, his uncle and his guardian since Lee was five years old, was rarely pictured. Sarah was surprised when she felt a tear on her cheek. She took a moment to examine a photo of Lee fishing with an old family friend named Barney, remembering her father's stories of the good times they had had together. A few photos of her father with longer hair and sideburns came next.

Finally, there were the photos she had seen on the shelves of the den, including one of her favorites, in which her father, already a very handsome man, was looking even more so as he stood with her mother on their wedding day. Their joy was apparent, and it surprised Sarah when she realized they had the same expression on their faces in the photo on the next page. Her mother, sitting in a hospital bed, was holding a very new, very small, and very sleepy Sarah while her father perched next to them on the bed, his arms draped possessively around both of his girls.

Sarah flipped through the pages of the other familiar photos, finally stopping at the photo of her with her father at the track championships her junior year of high school. She studied his face for a moment. On it was a look of love and pride. She remembered how he had been hesitant to let her compete, worried that she might become seriously ill by pushing herself when she was already sick. But he had finally conceded to her mother's argument that it was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity and was willing to admit she was right when Sarah had placed high enough to earn a medal.

He had been joyful because Sarah was joyful—or as joyful as she could be with the fever and headache that began to plague her in full force after the race. She studied her face and chuckled a little. While Sarah looked happy in the photo, it was obvious she was not well.

Flipping back to another photo of Lee dancing with her in the den, Sarah found herself chuckling again. While she had started out on her own two feet, she had been only three at the time. Her small hands reached high to the much larger hands of her father, who despite stooping down for the dance, towered over Sarah. In the next photo, Lee was now holding her on one arm, while attempting to hold her mother with the other as they danced about the den. Sarah guessed that her grandmother had taken the photos.

A tear splashed onto the page. Sarah quickly wiped it away. "Good thing you used those sheet protectors, Mom."

Amanda stopped to regard Sarah. She shut the refrigerator and came over to the couch, pulling a tissue from her pocket and handing it to her daughter. She sat down next to her.

"I've been so hard on Daddy. He's just trying to let me go…" She sighed. "He never watched his own parents let him go. They weren't there when he graduated from high school or got married." Sarah wiped her eyes with the tissue. "I'm so sorry, Mom. I've been pushing Daddy away and hurting you both."

Amanda took her daughter in her arms. "Oh, Sweetheart. You've been through so much this week. You needed time to deal with things. This wasn't meant to make you feel guilty. I just hoped you could understand what your dad was going through."

"I do now. Oh, I feel terrible." Sarah was crying in earnest now.

"Please don't, Sarah. Your father wouldn't want that. He just wants you to be happy. And he wants to enjoy this time with you. Please don't feel guilty."

Sarah pulled away and blew her nose.

"Remembering what you did this week—it was like you had just lived through everything. You needed time to deal with it emotionally. And it's understandable to feel angry as you work through things. We've already talked about my experience with being shot at."

Sarah could not help laughing a little. "He really shot the bullet through your sweater? I should consider myself lucky."

"Everybody okay down here?" Matt stood a few steps below the landing with a concerned look on his face that belied his cheerful tone.

Amanda stood up and went back to the kitchen. "We're almost done in the kitchen here, Matt."

Sarah also stood up and took a last swipe at her face with tissue. "I just need to get the things put away in the pantry and I'll be ready to go over to the apartment."

"I'll do that Sweetheart. Just show me what goes on which shelf. You can go take a look at Matt's handiwork upstairs."

Once they were alone in the bedroom, Matt put his hand on Sarah's face. "You were crying."

"My mom brought over a box of keepsakes. There was a wonderful photo album inside. Mom thought I should take a look—made me realize how much I really do appreciate my dad. Life wasn't always easy for him."

Matt wrapped his arms around her. "Things will be okay with you and your dad."

"I think Mom is hoping we'll make up when he comes back. I'm going to try."

"I'll say a little prayer right now. Then you can take a look and see if I left you enough space in the closet and the dressers."

After he prayed, they went to the walk-in closet. Matt's clothes took up one-third of the space.

Sarah laughed. "Good thing you grew up with sisters and a wise mother."

Matt tried to remain serious. "Women have more stuff to hang up." He gestured to part of the unused portion of the closet where there was only a single rod set high above the floor. "You need this space over here for your long dresses."

"Oh, it's okay to laugh. I'm more of a clothes horse than you."

"I don't mind." He took her hand and drew her back into the bedroom. "Let's take a look at the dressers. I've saved the wide one for you."

On the way back downstairs, the bookshelves in the sitting area at the top of the stairs caught Sarah's eye. All of the books that she and Matt had packed earlier that month at their apartments were arranged on the shelves together. "Oh! Look at what you've done! No wonder you were up here a while."

Matt stood by quietly while Sarah took a closer look. "And you've arranged them by topic." She turned back to Matt. "That was really sweet of you. I figured we'd be working on that this afternoon or something."

"You're happy with it? I was hoping it would be a good surprise." Matt, who was usually so sure of himself, looked a little nervous. "I started on it last night after you left, then finished just now."

She gave him a quick hug of reassurance. "I love that you did this. Thank you."

"We probably have thank you notes to write, but I was thinking we could do something fun later this afternoon and evening. Maybe go to a movie? It may be our last chance for a real date before the wedding."

"I'd love that."

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The three had finished cleaning Matt's apartment, turned in his keys, and arrived back at the townhouse by the time Lee showed up with their lunch.

Sarah joined her father in the kitchen as he pulled the sandwiches from the bag. "Oh, Daddy! You brought my favorite sandwich. Turkey and Swiss on rye from the place near the shopping mall."

Amanda and Matt glanced significantly at one another, and then went back to the dining room with the drinks.

"Yeah. And Matt told me he likes a good Reuben—this place has the best. I brought some of that nice mustard they sell, too." Lee placed Matt's sandwich on a plate.

Sarah reached out and put a hand on her father's arm. She spoke softly. "Daddy, I just want you to know that I really appreciate this. I appreciate all the things you've been doing for me. I'm sorry I haven't shown it lately."

Lee warmed to her touch and her sincere words. "I know you've been under a lot of stress. Frankly, I admire the way you've handled yourself."

"Oh, Daddy. Not the way I reacted in the arena. I left my gun. Then I had everyone worried about me when I went running without my phone."

"I know you won't let either of those things happen again. Nobody's perfect. You'd had quite a shock."

"I needed to remember what happened."

Lee looked away. He was sarcastic. "Yeah. Every gal needs to know her father shot at her."

"I needed to remember that you were watching over me. Not every girl has a crackshot for a father—one who has worked in the field and knows what to do when someone's life is on the line. I admire you, too, Daddy. You have no idea how much." Sarah put her arms about her father's waist and rested her head on his chest.

Lee was not one to become sentimental, but there were a few times in his life when he had. He could remember having tears in his eyes when he and Amanda had first laid eyes on Sarah in the delivery room at the hospital. _And again now. Damn it. Right in front of Granger._ "God, those onions are strong. I forgot to tell them no onions."

"It's okay, Daddy. Matt took Mom downstairs to show her the exercise room or something."

Lee swiped at his eyes with the back of his hand. He took advantage of their moment alone. "I love you so much, Sarah. It was tearing me up that I'd risked your life. Then when you became angry at me, I couldn't blame you. I hope you can forgive me."

"Of course I forgive you. I wasn't angry. Not really. I was upset. I wanted to talk to you. I didn't know what to think. It was hard to process."

"And I avoided you."

"Not every time. I avoided you, too. The point is, Daddy, that I needed to believe that you had everything under control. You saw what needed to be done and you did it. You've always taken care of me."

"I need to pass the baton now."

Sarah stepped back. "I guess so. But Matt won't mind having you as back up. You were backing him up at the park. Matt was trying to throw his knife at Santiago when you shot him. I'm not sure I'd like being skewered by accident."

"Hey. Matt's aim is dead on. Do you know his field name is Eagle Eye? I talked with his former commanding officer when we hired him on. The one he reported to in Afghanistan. He said he got the name from Matt's men. Matt saved me once with his knife, and he's saved others before me in the same way."

"I guess you made sure that if you were going to pass the baton, you'd do it to a good man?"

Lee absentmindedly took a potato chip out of the bag and leaned against the counter as he popped the chip in his mouth. "You caught him on your own. By the side of the road, if I remember correctly."

"But you still had him pass inspection."

Sheepish now, Lee took the sandwiches to the dining room table. Sarah followed him out of the kitchen.

"I love you, Daddy. I'm not moving out of town. I'll still be around. And we can have lunch together, go to the range, drive on the track…"

"Yeah. All that great bonding stuff fathers do with their daughters." Lee's smile was rueful.

"It's what I like to do with you."

Lee stopped Sarah, placing a hand on her shoulder. "Like I said. I love you, Sarah. You have no idea how much."

"I guess when I have kids someday, I'll have more of an idea."

They were hugging once again when Amanda and Matt came back into the room. Somehow Amanda managed to pull her husband aside once Sarah went to sit with Matt at the table. "Well done, Stetson."

"I've learned from the best."


	13. Chapter 13

As Amy placed the last wine glass back on the shelf, Jennifer wiped down the counters.

"With all this help, I feel like I've hardly done anything tonight." Amanda smiled at her daughters-in-law as she sipped the last of her hot chocolate at the kitchen table. In the den nearby, Jessica lay on the couch watching her cousins David and Seth as they sat on the floor, playing a game with the Wii.

"You've been doing a lot lately, Amanda. We're glad we could make the load lighter." Amy sat down next to Amanda with her own hot chocolate.

"Well, Matt and Sarah had everything so well-organized for the move that it was mostly a show of support the other day. And there isn't anything to do for the wedding at the moment."

"She insisted that she didn't need us to help with the move." Jennifer stood with the sponge in her hand.

"Sarah said that you two have done enough. It gave her some time to get to know Patti Enriquez a little better. That's a good thing. And it was good for Lee and me to see the townhouse on Saturday. Lee and Sarah needed to talk." Amanda glanced at the clock, then in the general direction of the office. "I wonder what the men are up to." She stood and made her way up the stairs to the foyer and to the office beyond.

"Man, I don't miss those days." Phillip chuckled to himself. "Granger is probably bored out of his mind. Except he does have Sarah there now. Look. She just showed up."

The three men jumped when Amanda saw that they were looking at camera footage of the bullpen at the Agency. "What are you doing, Phillip?"

Although he was now pushing forty, Phillip knew he was not too old to be reprimanded by his mother. "Just making sure Sis made it to the Agency okay, Mom." He clicked to another website, but not before Amanda caught a glimpse of Matt and Sarah sitting together at a computer. As usual, Marine guards could be seen in the hallway outside.

"Honestly, Amanda. Phillip pulled up the remote access just before you walked in. I was about to tell him to knock it off."

"If you hadn't, I would have." Jamie glared at Phillip. "You're such a… Do you spy on them all the time? What do you think they're going to do with the camera on them and some Marines watching?"

Phillip grew defensive. "Actually, I do like to keep an eye on Sarah. And I don't mind saying so. I guess I don't have much of an excuse at the moment. Sorry."

Amanda caught Lee's eye and they both started to laugh. "Some things never change." She grew serous. "But she has Matt to keep an eye on her now."

"Your mother is right. We need to back off and let Matt take care of Sarah—and let Sarah take care of Sarah."

Phillip huffed a little. "As long as she manages to stay out of trouble with people like the cartel." Seeing Lee's expression, he changed his tone. "But I see your point."

Amanda glanced at the clock. "Look. It's getting late. Amy and Jennifer are tired and so am I. We'll be at your house at noon tomorrow, Phillip."

After Lee and Amanda had said their goodbyes and wished everyone a merry Christmas, Amanda followed Lee absent-mindedly to his office.

"I'll just be a minute."

"You checking that bullpen camera feed again?"

Lee colored but did not say anything.

"Because I'm curious what Sarah thinks she going to do with Matt all evening. Didn't Francine tell us when she and Efraim stopped by that there was nothing going on tonight?"

"Oh, they're probably playing a game on the computer or watching YouTube videos."

"I'm not going to ask how you would know that. Come on, Stetson. Let's go to bed. We promised Matt and Sarah we'd meet them at their church in the morning."

Lee was staring at his computer screen, reminiscing. "Remember when we'd stay up until well past midnight on a case, sleep a few hours, then head back in? Those were the good old days. Now the next generation is living it."

Amanda yawned. "Right. Well, I loved partnering with you, but I don't miss the crazy hours at all. And thankfully Matt is not on a case at the moment. That's the last thing those two need." She started for the door, but turned around. "You know, it's kind of nice to see them just sitting there, not doing anything much. Sarah said they spent yesterday afternoon writing thank you notes. They're all caught up on the notes now, but that girl is running herself ragged."

"Now, Amanda. Sarah told me they went to a movie on Saturday and had dinner at that new restaurant at the mall. I'm pretty sure they were dancing in her apartment when I took out the trash that night."

Amanda sighed. "Oh, Stetson. I give up. You'll never stop being a spy. I'm going to bed. Merry Christmas."

"Okay, okay. I'm turning off the computer."

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Lee was glad he had offered to drive when he glanced in the rearview mirror. Both Matt and Sarah had remained alert for the church service, but they were growing sleepy in the warm car now.

"You two don't have to stay all afternoon. Matt should go home and get a few hours' sleep before he goes to work."

Matt took a deep breath and stretched. "I'll be okay. I'm just covering the bullpen from five to nine."

Shaking off her sleepiness, Sarah joined in. "Yes, but you were there twelve hours yesterday. I left at two a.m. and you stayed until five. You can at least take a nap on the couch in Phillip's office while I watch that movie with Jessica."

"Yes, dear." Matt reached over and took Sarah's hand. His eyes twinkled.

Lee and Amanda exchanged amused glances as Sarah rolled her eyes.

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Christmas Day was more relaxed than the evening before. The crowd was larger, as Amy's parents and her sister's family had joined them in the morning, then stayed to eat an early dinner with the Stetsons. Instead of using the fine china, Amy served the big meal on paper plates. And no one batted an eye when Matt took a nap in Phillip's office. While Jamie managed to keep his rambunctious young sons out of what Amy had dubbed the man cave, it had been difficult to keep them quiet as several of the family members played a board game. Phillip and Lee had been in and out of the room once or twice, checking out news and other things on the internet.

At one point Phillip had whispered to Lee, "How does he sleep through all of this?"

"Ex-Army, served in the field. At least that's what he told me before he fell asleep while I was watching a movie in his room in Kazakhstan."

"I'm not sure what Sarah's excuse is. She's trying to watch that Disney movie with Jessica, but she can't keep her eyes open." Phillip snickered.

"She just takes after your mom. In fact, all of you kids can sleep through anything." He glanced over at Matt, who was stirring. "Come on. Let's get out of here."

After the two men left, Matt opened his eyes. He checked his watch. He still had over an hour before he had to leave for the Agency. Sarah would be driving him to the townhouse to get his car. After smoothing out his hair and his shirt, he wandered out to the family room. On the couch, Jessica had curled up next to Sarah, and now Sarah's head rested against the back cushion as she dozed.

Seeing Matt, Jessica pointed to Sarah and rolled her eyes.

Matt grinned. He snuck around to the other side of the couch and attempted to shift Sarah over a little without waking her so he could sit on her other side.

Almost as if by instinct, Sarah's elbow shot up. Matt dodged her elbow and caught her wrist. He laughed as Sarah, now fully awake, looked at him in surprise.

"Oh no! Matt, I'm so sorry."

"It's my fault for teaching you that one. No harm done."

Jessica, who seemed to have missed the interaction, paused the movie. "You've been asleep for the past fifteen minutes, Aunt Sarah. I'll let you catch up while I go get us some hot chocolate. You want some, Uncle Matt?"

"Thanks, Jessica. That would be great."

Matt waited until Jessica was out of earshot. "I don't know if I should be happy that you'll never let another guy make the moves on you or be fearful that I'll be taken out if I get frisky with you in the middle of the night."

This time Sarah's blow, a swat on the arm, found its mark. "Matthew Granger. Someone might hear you."

"It's just us. And we're practically married. Just eleven more days." As if to prove his point, Matt gave Sarah a kiss on the lips, then settled more comfortably into the space he had created for himself on the couch, wrapping one arm around his fiancée. "Go ahead and catch up on the movie. I guess you needed a nap, too."

"Yep." Sarah gave up trying to conjure up some kind of comeback and giggled a little as she searched for the last scene she could remember watching. "You really want to watch a Disney princess movie, Granger?"

"I might be able to pick up some tips from the hero."

"For saving the world?"

"Well, since I've already got my queen, sure." When Sarah looked at him sideways, he continued. "If I have to go to work in a little while, I'd like to spend as much time as possible with you. It _is_ Christmas."

"That's very sweet, but I can ask Jessica to finish it later."

"I can handle it. My sisters watched a lot of these when we were kids."

The prince was just about to help the princess escape from her evil stepmother when Sarah paused the movie so she could turn to Matt. "I want to go through the arena again."

Matt looked at Sarah sharply. "Are you sure?"

"Yes. I started thinking about it last night as I was driving home, after you showed me the videos of your arena test. Then today, when I saw Daddy standing next to Mom in church, singing along with the hymns, I realized that I needed to do it for him just as much as for me."

"He doesn't expect you to do that."

"No, but he was willing to visit our church. He said he wanted to see what it was like before the wedding, but Mom told me he was doing it out of fatherly interest more than anything."

Jessica walked in just then with the mugs.

Matt spoke hurriedly. "I'll be there. Just let me know the time."

Sarah patted his knee as Jessica began playing the movie once again.

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Taking a few cleansing breaths, Sarah tried to relax her shoulders. She bent her elbows back, then released them and shook out her shoulders. After stretching her neck, she stood quietly.

"You ready, Stetson?"

"That's my dad or mom. I'm Sparrow."

"Gotcha. Sparrow. You know the scenario. Lone gunman, but he or she may have accomplices on the ground. Simulation starts in fifteen seconds." Leatherneck did not finish the countdown.

Running in a crouch position, Sarah found cover behind a small stand of shrubs. She listened for the direction of the gunfire. She thought she saw a flash behind the crates at the top of the "hill," a small, sloped area of the arena. She was in danger of being "hit" by friendly fire and needed to move. After plotting a protected route to the side of the building, she started to cover the distance.

A young woman with a stroller popped up. There was no baby, and she was drawing something out of the back of the stroller. _A shotgun?_ Sarah fired twice and dashed to the side of the building.

Another pop-up, this time a middle-aged man, appeared nearby. Sarah almost fired, then saw that he was not armed.

In the observation room, Leatherneck stood at the window, listening through his headset. Lee stood beside him. Matt perched on the railing near the door to the arena stairs. From his vantage point, he could see the "shooter." He could also see that Sarah would have no cover if she tried to get a clear shot at the fake assailant.

He glanced behind him as the door to the hallway opened. Phillip, Jamie, and Amanda filed in. Amanda went to Lee's side. Phillip and Jamie stood near Grant Hill, who had tried to make himself inconspicuous in the back corner of the room.

Backing up along the edge of the false building, Sarah contemplated her next move. She looked behind the building. She had never noticed before that a narrow "alley" ran between the building's false back and the wall. The false back of the building was really two walls that angled toward the arena's outside wall. The space where the corner of the two back walls jutted towards the arena wall was quite small and probably not intended as a throughway. But Sarah thought she could make it.

Gunfire erupted nearby. Another form had popped up not far from Sarah. It was a gunman, firing towards the other "agents." She did not have a clear shot. Backing up towards the wall, she shot at the new gunman and dashed behind the building. It was a tight fit around the corner, but Sarah squeaked through. She readjusted her headset once she was out the other side.

"Where did she go?" Lee stared at the side of the building where he'd last seen Sarah, but she did not reemerge.

"I heard a sound over the headset—interference. I wonder…"

Matt guessed that she had tried to squeeze behind the building. One of the women in his class had tried it, but she had given up. He was starting to worry that Sarah would not be able to come close to beating the scenario. When he had run one similar to it, he had taken a risky route straight up the hill, under cover of the bushes.

Having gotten her bearings, Sarah quickly contemplated her next move. Now that she was on the other side of the building, she had a clear shot of the original gunman, but unless she acted quickly, he would spot her and she would be "dead" first. The pop up was not stationery, but moved every few seconds. When Sarah raised her gun, she did not have a clear shot. More gunfire—blanks, really—came from his gun. But it was not aimed at her. Then it moved slightly into view. She fired off two rounds from her Glock.

Sarah held her breath as she waited for Leatherneck's pronouncement. There was a slight chance that the gunman had aimed in her direction, but it looked like the pop up was facing to her right.

Suddenly the overhead lights came on. Sarah stepped away from the building and removed the magazine from her handgun. She checked the barrel for cartridges.

"Well done, Sparrow. You narrowly missed being hit, but you managed to take down three gunmen. We might even give you extra points for using an alley that doesn't exist."

Sarah blew out her breath. "Thanks, Leatherneck."

Lee, followed by Leatherneck and Matt, came down the stairs from the observation room.

"Nice work, Pumpkin," Lee whispered in her ear. Placing his arm around her shoulders, he hugged her tightly to him. More loudly, he said, "I liked your trick, sneaking behind the building like that."

Sarah realized her hands were shaking. She lowered the weapon and magazine, hoping no one would notice. "I guess I was skinny enough to make it. No wonder Mom told me to put on some weight."

A chorus of congratulations came from the top of the stairs. Sarah waved at her mother and brothers, who disappeared behind the door once again.

"Jamie and Phillip had to get back to some case—they're helping out the New York office. Your mother and I were wondering if we could take you and Matt for lunch. Leatherneck, you're welcome to join us."

"That's a nice offer, Ace, but my good friend Callie is waiting for me at her place." Leatherneck winked at Lee. He reached for the Glock and the magazine. "Let me lock those up for you, Junior. It looks like you could use a little fresh air."

Seeing that Sarah was a little unsteady on her feet, Matt quickly took charge. He spoke to Lee. "We'll meet you and Amanda in the hallway outside."

His arm around Sarah's waist, Matt guided Sarah out of the arena. She was grateful to have Matt supporting her as she leaned up against the wall.

He watched her face closely as her color came back and she seemed to relax. "You know, you got a better score than most of the people in my class. I'm really proud of you, Sweetie."

"It's not real, but it still stresses me out. I hope I never have to shoot anyone. Ever. It's taking a life, even if the person is a criminal."

Matt wanted to do more than simply stand there with Sarah. But there were cameras at either end of the hallway. He tried to comfort her with words alone. "I pray you never do. But if you are ever called to a situation like that, you don't need to doubt yourself. You're one of the most capable new agents I've seen."

She looked up to see that his eyes were intently focused on her. "You really mean that. You aren't just trying to be encouraging."

"I'm completely serious." His eyes finally left her face as he heard movement down the hall behind him.

"Okay, you two. No fraternizing in the hallway."

"Lee." Amanda poked him with her elbow.

"A-mand-a. Let a man have a little fun with the freshman agent." He cast a loving look at his daughter, his eyes twinkling.

"I wanted to say in person that I'm proud of you, Sarah. I know it wasn't easy, but you made it through. And we both know I'm not talking about your aim or strategy." She offered her daughter a look of understanding and held her hand briefly.

Lee cleared his throat, and then spoke in his most cheerful voice. "Let's go to lunch."

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Watching the clock tick slowly towards midnight, Sarah readied her plastic cup of sparkling cider. She had talked the armed Marine guards in the hallway into taking their own cups, but only one would drink at a time. She glanced back at Matt, who sat in a chair close by hers.

"You know," she whispered, "when I told Mom that I was bringing this to ring in the new year, she warned me that the Marines would not have any. I think I broke the ice a little."

Matt did not look over at the two men. "You could break the ice with anyone. And it is New Year's Eve. I may just kiss you when that clock hits midnight."

"Matt! It'll be recorded. The guards will see us."

His eyes twinkled.

"You're serious. Okay, fine. But let's make it worth their while."

Now it was Matt's turn to be incredulous. "I may just take you up on that, Miss Stetson."

"In a few days, I won't be Miss Stetson anymore."

"Four and half days, to be exact. Then you'll be Mrs. Granger." Matt took her hand and played with her engagement ring, but his eyes were riveted to the television. "Are you watching the ball in Times Square?" Normally the bullpen televisions were used to monitor news coverage, but there was no rule he could not watch the celebrations briefly on New Year's Eve. He knew from the flash traffic that there were agents from both the New York and D.C. offices at the event.

"Yes, I'm watching." They listened as the crowd counted down the last several seconds of the year. As soon as the crowd started to cheer, Matt raised his plastic cup to Sarah's before repeating the gesture to the guard in the hallway who had his cup. After they had taken their sips, Matt took Sarah's cup and placed it with his on the desk. He pulled her up with him and drew her into the conference room nearby—out of sight of the Marines and the surveillance cameras. Wrapping his arms around his future bride, he kissed her.

Sarah wondered when they were going to come up for air. But she decided to relax, enjoying the kiss as much as Matt. Finally he pulled away. His eyes searched hers, and his hand caressed her face. She thought he might kiss her again, but he adjusted his shirt and led her back out of the conference room.

Sarah looked at the guards out of the corner of her eye as they sat back down. They were both at attention, eyes riveted to the corridor. She snickered and whispered, "We'll never know if they saw us go in there, you cad. That was the longest kiss you've ever given me."

"Not quite, but it's up there. And I could tell you were enjoying it, too."

"You keep track?" Sarah pushed her swivel chair away from Matt's, but he grabbed the armrest and held her in place.

Before Matt could say anything, the desktop computer nearby beeped, indicating an inter-agency alert. Matt scooted his chair over so he could read the screen. "Oh, I may have to cut our little party short. Can't say why, but it's from Homeland and is in the vicinity of Embassy Row. They're asking for any agents who are available for backup."

Matt typed in a text message that would be sent to the Agency personnel on standby.

"You know, you've only been called in that way three times since we got back from Texas."

"Lucky, I guess. Plus they took me off that roster during the depositions. I may have to go over there until enough of our people can show up." Matt typed something else on the computer, and then took out his Bluetooth and paired it with his phone.

Sarah packed up the deck of cards they had been using earlier and put it in her purse. Then she collected the plastic cups. As she grabbed the cup from the table near the door, one of the guards spoke to her. "Don't worry, Ma'am. Your secret's safe with us." He winked at her at turned back to the hallway.

Sarah was blushing furiously when she rejoined Matt at the computer, where he was watching for updates. He glanced over at her and then turned to look over his shoulder at the Marines.

"What's going on? Did one of the guards say something to you?"

"Yes."

Matt's brows furrowed, and he started to get up, but Sarah put a hand on his arm.

"He said that our secret is safe with them."

Matt relaxed considerably. "I figured it would be like that. Learned a few things while working at NATO."

"You might have told me."

Matt grinned. "Nah. It was more fun this way."

Scowling, Sarah stood up. "Matthew Granger."

But he was ignoring her as he scrolled through a message on the computer. "Hey, I have to go out there." At Sarah's expression, he continued. "Don't worry about me. I'm just staying until more Agency people show up. It's low level."

Matt typed a text, then grabbed their jackets off a nearby chair. "Come on. We can walk to our cars together."

"Well, I guess I shouldn't complain. We had our little celebration."

Matt waited until the elevator doors had closed. "If you think that was a celebration, just wait until the honeymoon." He winked at her.

Sarah's eyes widened. "I know that cider is nonalcoholic. What's gotten into you?"

"Only a few more days until our wedding, that's what. We have family coming; Brian and Josh will be here. Kate's bringing Micah. I'm excited."

Shaking her head, Sarah felt her own grin forming as she walked with Matt into the parking garage.

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With the last of the clothes she had brought from her apartment now hanging in the closet, Sarah turned to Matt. "It's official now. We have to get married. I've put my lingerie in your dresser and my shoes in your closet."

He drawled his reply, "Well, it could mean something else, but since I've got a couple of wedding rings and a marriage license in my bedside table, I'll go to the altar with you before we shack up."

Sarah swatted him playfully. He caught her hand and pulled her in close, kissing her slowly. He leaned his forehead against hers and spoke softly. "Less than four days. And it's _our_ closet." He thought of their run that morning. It had been good to be out in the crisp, fresh air of the greenbelt nearby. Fatigued from staying up most of the night and sleeping only a few hours early that morning, he had felt invigorated afterwards. But he also found it hard to resist his physical feelings for Sarah when he was tired. She was always so appealing after a run on a brisk day, when her cheeks were rosy and the stray hairs from her braid were framing her face. And here in the bedroom area of the home they would very soon share, he was even more tempted. He took her by the hand and led her downstairs.

"While you were arranging your clothes, I took the liberty of putting your kitchen things away. Make sure I did it to your liking." He opened the kitchen cupboards and the pantry door.

"You do think like an engineer. Very organized. Thank you." She gave him a quick kiss on the cheek.

"Now we have tea in our cupboards. And muffin tins." He winked at her.

"You know, I was thinking of making a batch before your family gets here. My mom is cooking up a bunch of stuff—she's got cookies, a poppyseed cake, and homemade bread, but maybe it would be nice to have something here. We can freeze what doesn't get eaten right away and have it after the honeymoon."

"I like the way you think. We have a few hours. What can I do to help?"

"Let's bake some muffins first, then a batch of cookies. Once I get them started, you should take a nap. You look like you could use one."

Yawning now, Matt had to agree. He arranged the racks in the oven for Sarah and helped her pull out the ingredients before going upstairs to lie down.

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Lee sat back in his chair, surveying the ample crowd at the dining room table on Maplewood. Even without Jamie, Phillip, and their families, the table was full. All five members of the Granger family and Sharon's parents were in attendance, and two of the Grangers' good friends had joined them. Brian and Josh seemed like solid young men—he could see why Matt had chosen them to stand up with him at the ceremony on Saturday. Laughter caught his attention as he turned to the other end of the table. Lee was glad for Sarah because she seemed to have impressed Sharon's parents, Florence and William. The three of them sat together as William seemed to be telling a story.

After pulling an all-night holiday shift at the Agency, Matt had been looking a bit worn around the edges earlier, but he was in the midst of an animated conversation with his sisters and friends now. Amanda and Sharon were in the kitchen, preparing to serve the dessert. Lee had not been surprised at the ease with which both Sharon and Amanda had become friends. They shared many similarities, except for their appearance. Sharon, a blonde, was a little taller than Amanda, and Amanda, a brunette, had a slighter build. Lee could see how Matt resembled his mother in appearance, but his father in personality.

He turned to David, who had also been surveying the scene. Although Lee had heard that David was opinionated and outspoken with his family, he was quiet and reserved in other settings. Lee found himself initiating conversation for not the first time that evening. "It's great how your kids get along so well."

"It wasn't always that way. Matt was mostly even-keeled, but the girls would bicker quite a bit, sometimes pushing even their brother's buttons."

"Phillip and Jamie used to trade words—and Sarah was not perfect growing up, either. She and Jamie got along great, but sometimes she and Phillip would butt heads. Still and all, Amanda says Sarah was the easiest."

"The third one learns from the others and the parents have everything all figured after the first couple of kids."

"I think it helped to have so many hands, too. The boys were teenagers by the time Sarah was born. I had a steep learning curve. I didn't become the boys' stepfather until just a year before Sarah came along."

"I hear that you are pretty close with them."

"Yeah. They're great—like my own sons. I'm sorry to say their dad died only a few years after Amanda and I married."

"Well, it was God's will that you could be already involved in their lives, then. Probably eased the hurt a bit."

Lee, slightly startled by the depth of David's words, regarded him for a moment. "I'd like to think so. I never expected to get married, let alone become a father."

"Well, you have a remarkable daughter. I'm sure you had a lot to do with that as well."

Clearing his throat and coloring a little, Lee found himself opening up to David. "Well, thank you. I could say the same about your son. It's really been a pleasure having him join our family. It isn't easy letting go of my little girl, but Matt is a good man."

Lee had not seen Sarah walk up behind him, but he felt her hands on his shoulders. She leaned down and whispered in his ear, "I love you, Daddy."

Dreading that he might become all choked up, Lee changed the subject. But not before patting his daughter's hand and giving her a kiss on the cheek while her face was close to his. He turned back to the crowd at the table. "It looks like dessert is here. Since I think I see a little beverage left in everyone's glasses, I'd like to propose a toast." He lifted his nearly empty wine glass. "To our new family and friends. Welcome to our neck of the woods. Amanda and I are glad that we will soon be family. And to Matt and Sarah. May the wedding go smoothly and may they have a long and happy life together."

Lee felt only a twinge at those last words, but he could see his wife was pulling out a tissue. Sarah wrapped an arm around her mother's waist. He imagined Amanda might go through a number of tissues in the next few days. He turned back to David.

"So, I hear you're in for a little sightseeing."

"Well, we did a number of things when we came to see Matt last spring, but we're going to check off a couple more items on our list. We'd all like to see Sarah's exhibit at the Smithsonian."

"Well, the lead curator gets the official credit on that one, but it's probably for the best."

"The same reason there's no wedding announcement in the newspapers here and at home?"

Lee cleared his throat. "Uh, yeah. I hope Sharon wasn't too bent out of shape."

"Matt explained it to her pretty well. Not sure the girls bought the 'official' excuse. At some point, Matt may have to tell them what he does."

Before Lee could say anything more, the noise level rose in the room as Matt, Brian, and Josh began to clear the table and the girls followed them into the kitchen to help with clean up.

Sharon came over to stand by David. "I want to thank you, Lee and Amanda, for letting the girls stay in the apartment. Are you sure it's no trouble? They could stay with us at the hotel."

Amanda was quick to reply. "Of course it's no trouble. Sarah wanted to spend the last few nights before the wedding in her old bedroom upstairs. And it will be nice for the three girls to have a little extra time together."

"Our girls love Sarah." Sharon colored a little, and her brows knit together. "But do you think they should go the party Sarah's friends are throwing for her Thursday night? I know Sarah is very conservative…"

"They'll be fine. It's just a couple of old roommates, her good friend Christina, and her sisters-in-law. I know Jennifer and Amy will take care of your girls, as would Sarah, of course." Suddenly Amanda's expression changed, as if she had had an inspiration. "You know, we were invited. I hadn't considered going, but you know, it might be kind of fun. What about your mother?"

"Oh! You know, it might be kind of fun to go. Mother and Dad will be fine at the hotel. They'll be asleep an hour after we have to be there anyway."

"Then it's a plan." Amanda put her hand on Sharon's arm, but Sharon gave her a quick hug.

"Well, we should probably get going. Maybe if we leave, the guys will clear out, too." David rose from the table at the same time as Lee. "It's been a pleasure, Lee."

"The pleasure's mine, David."

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Lee stood in the darkened bedroom with Amanda, listening to the quiet chatter of voices in the den below. He wrapped his arms around his wife and chuckled. "You know, we take for granted how quiet Sarah and Matt are."

"Quiet people often like having outgoing friends." She laughed softly. "That Emma Granger is so much like Sharon. They both remind me of Mother." She listened as Emma's voice rose above the others. Lauren could be heard hushing her sister.

Lee kissed her hair. "I kind of thought the same thing, too. And Sharon is like William. Lauren is more like Matt and David." He pulled away and took her hand, drawing her to the bed. "Think you can sleep with all that racket?"

"We've done it before."

Lee chuckled as they settled under the covers together. "You might have slept, but I was the one that would tell the boys and their buddies to zip it after I couldn't take it anymore. Your mother always said that I won her heart the first time I did that. She was getting weary of being the bad guy."

Amanda pretended to be aghast. "You never told me."

"The boys and I had a few secrets. Had to have our male bonding."

"Are you going to Matt's party on Thursday?"

"David and I were thinking we'd go get beers and let the young folks do their thing. He said Florence and William would be staying at the hotel."

"But Matt invited you. Sharon and I are going to Sarah's."

"I don't want to make him more embarrassed if his buddies pull some stunt. Imagine if a stripper showed up and his new father-in-law were there."

"There won't be a stripper."

"Uh, Amanda… You weren't at Jamie's party. The poor kid turned all sorts of shades of red. Thankfully the girl took mercy on him and stopped before…"

Amanda put her finger on Lee's lips. "I don't want to know. I'm sure Phillip had something to do with that. I heard Brian and Josh reassuring Matt that they wouldn't let one in the door. Matt said he'd leave—go out a window if he had to—if they pulled that on him."

"Well, I'm still not sure it's a good idea for David and me to go, but I'll think about it."

"And if they do have a stripper, you can help Matt get out of there." Amanda snuggled down further under the blankets and rolled onto her side, satisfied that she'd accomplished her goal.


	14. Chapter 14

Brian and Josh were still teasing Matt as he pulled into the garage at the townhouse late Thursday night. He laughed along with their jests, secretly pleased that the stunt had really come to nothing.

At first the party had seemed like a normal pizza and beer get-together with the guys. Jamie and Jennifer had volunteered their house, as Jennifer had made plans to take the boys to her parents' house before going to Sarah's party.

Brian and Josh had talked Jamie into letting them choose a playlist—songs from Matt's high school and college years. Matt could tell how many beers the men had polished off by how loudly they were singing with some of the tunes.

When the doorbell rang, Matt started for the sliding glass doors near the patio, but Johnson and Gonzales beat him to it. As they had stood there, pretending to be engrossed in some story from Johnson's college days, Matt considered the different ways he could break free. Even Rene came over to block the way. _Some partner_, Matt seethed to himself.

"…as long as we're not too late for the stripper." Lee's self-conscious chuckle rumbled through the Kings' entryway and soon he was walking into the room with Matt's father.

After Matt greeted Lee with a man-hug, Lee spoke quietly in his ear. "I saw those two boxing you in, Agent Granger. You could use your buddies as a great example at rookie training. There were about three ways you could have cleared out of there."

Matt grinned back. "But they were Agency and likely to leave marks. Sarah would kill me if I ruined the wedding photos with a black eye."

"You thought we were the stripper." Lee winked at him.

The doorbell rang again, but this time Matt truly was trapped. He shot a panicked glance at Lee. "This is not my thing, Lee."

"It won't last forever. If you're uncomfortable, act like you're miserable and maybe the gal will have mercy on you." He looked around. "And if you figure out how to escape, I'll be right on your heels. Amanda will kill me if I sit through a stripper."

"I'm working on it, Lee." Matt started to inch his way towards the sliding glass door again.

A very large cardboard cake had been delivered anonymously to the front door. Several of the men from the Agency, including Rene and Phillip, as well as a couple of guys from the dance class hooted, while Brian and Josh watched it nervously. David sidled over to Lee and Matt.

"I have to get out of here. I can't do this to your mother, Matt. Especially not in front of you."

Not relishing the idea of watching a strip tease show with his father, Matt muttered, "Don't even explain, Dad."

"Poor Sarah."

Matt avoided his father's eyes. He knew he should play it cool and put up with the prank, but other than the occasional nude photos he could not have avoided during his time in the Army, he had never really seen a naked woman up close. At least not a live, naked woman.

Bawdy music began to play from the cake, and Matt looked helplessly toward the door. He felt like he was betraying Sarah. Was it his imagination, or had Jamie helped to hem him in? There was now no one between him and the giant cake. And why couldn't Lee, who had escaped from worse situations than this, have gotten out either? Matt noticed that Phillip had him boxed in on the other side.

The music continued, and Matt prepared for what looked to be the inevitable. He prayed that whoever popped out of the cake would be wearing some kind of clothing. _At least underwear or a bathing suit, please God._

Suddenly, the lid of the cake popped open, a large photo glued to its underside. The lid flapped back and forth a little, slowly coming to a stop. The bawdy music suddenly changed to Hall and Oates' "Sara, Smile." Confused, Matt avoided looking at the photo, while the rest of the men started laughing hysterically.

"Aw, Granger. We wouldn't do that to you. You really would kill us in our sleep. Or the Chief would." Johnson was loud and more than a little drunk. Gonzales elbowed him, eyeing the non-Agency guests.

"Look how red he is. Gotcha, buddy!" Rene came up and slapped Matt on the back.

Still confused, Matt made an attempt to look at the photo, which had now stopped moving. He rolled his eyes. It was a photo of Sarah, looking lovely, but fully dressed, at the grand opening of the museum exhibit she had put together at the International Spy Museum. Her hand rested on Matt's arm. They looked a little like a bride and groom. Even Sarah's dress, which was light-colored, appeared to be white in the grayscale photo. It was a clever gag, but simply that, a gag. And an innocent one. Matt breathed a sigh of relief.

Phillip could not stop his laughing—until he saw Lee's face. He whispered to him, "Aw, come on Lee. You thought it was funny, too, when I told you about it. That's why you brought David."

"But don't humiliate the poor guy. You're louder than you think."

Matt had pretended not to hear the two of them, but he could not avoid Brian and Josh. A little tipsy themselves, they had continued to make jibes the rest of the evening and all the way home from the party. Now they were coming into the townhouse from the garage. When Brian and Josh horsed around a little, Matt grabbed their arms. Still unsteady on their feet, they allowed him to separate them.

"Why don't you two go fight over the bathroom or who's got the floor upstairs or whatever? I'm going to bed."

"Better get your beauty sleep. You're going to be busy Saturday night."

Josh shoved Brian. "Enough, Man. Now you're getting out of hand."

Brian made a move to shove Josh back, but Matt caught him as he missed and lost his balance. "Just go to bed. Drink some water so you don't have a hangover in the morning."

Matt checked on his two friends before he settled down for the night. Brian was already snoring loudly in the sleeping bag on the floor of the living room. Josh gave Matt a little wave from the sofabed in the exercise room. "Sorry we were so obnoxious, Matt. I hope you had fun somehow."

"It was great. It's nice that such a big crowd showed up." Matt gestured towards Brian upstairs. "I guess he's as much of a lightweight as Lauren."

"Nah. He had two of the margaritas, plus two beers. I stay away from the hard stuff."

Matt nodded in understanding. "Well, good night."

Once in his own bed, Matt checked his phone. Sarah had texted a few minutes earlier: "You still up?"

He speed-dialed her number and smiled when she answered on the first ring.

"Hello, my soon-to-be husband."

"Two more days, sweet thing."

Sarah giggled softly. "Your Texas twang comes out loud and clear sometimes."

"Where are you?"

"In bed in my old room."

"Like I said, two more nights without my sweetie, then…" He could hear her shift in the bed and remembered how it had felt to hold Sarah and fall asleep with her in his arms that one night. Perhaps it had not been the right choice to get under the covers that night—he could have turned up heat on the thermostat—but it had been rather innocent and he had gotten up before anything could happen in the morning. Still, he had been tempted to do more when he had awakened. She had smelled so good…

"…Are you still there?"

"Just letting my thoughts get away from me."

Sarah grinned to herself, but did not respond to his suggestive comment. "I asked how your party went."

Matt told Sarah the short version of the cake prank. "Brian's out cold now, and Josh is feeling a bit sheepish. How was your party?"

"Lots of giggling, sugar, a little alcohol, silly YouTube videos, and loud singing. You would have been miserable."

"Sounds almost like my party."

"Except we had less alcohol and more sugar. Poor Lauren may not get much sleep tonight. When I left your sisters in the apartment, Emma was talking a mile a minute."

"Well, the margaritas and beer had the same effect. But we didn't drool over men on the internet. We drooled over a photo of my fiancée."

"Oh, they did not. They were all cracking up and falling over each other over their silly prank. You're probably the only one who actually looked at the photo."

"So, I'm not sure why we had to go through these rituals. I guess it was to thank our guests ahead of time for coming to the wedding on Saturday."

"It's better than some of the other rituals I learned about in history classes. The bride and groom having to make a racket in an upstairs room while guests partied below, nursemaids hanging around outside the bridal chamber…"

Matt quickly grew uncomfortable at the images conjuring in his head. He thought of the video surveillance at the safe house in particular. "I've got the picture. I like my cabin in the woods idea. No one hanging around. And no cameras inside."

"I agree about the cabin. But it was good to let our friends and siblings have these parties. It's giving them a chance to show their support for us. It may not be our style, but we survived."

"You're right. Thanks for letting me whine a little." He also said a silent little prayer of thanks that he did not have the image of some stripper in his head.

"I've whined quite a bit to you on more than one occasion. I owe you."

"You don't owe me."

They were quiet for a moment. Sarah spoke first. "I should go to bed. I might be keeping Daddy awake. Mom can sleep through anything except a sick kid."

"That's radar, not hearing."

Sarah laughed quietly. "Right. I love you."

"Love you, too. And please don't misunderstand me. This is a happy time."

"I know you think that. Good night."

"Good night, Sweetie."

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Amanda smiled knowingly at her husband over her cup of coffee as the two Granger girls walked into the kitchen the next morning, bleary-eyed. They were dressed and ready for the day, but they obviously wanted more sleep.

"Good morning!"

Amanda's greeting was met with polite, but somewhat less enthusiastic replies.

"Why don't you help yourselves to some pancakes, girls? They're keeping warm in the oven. I have some scrambled eggs in there, too."

"Thanks, Amanda. We should eat up before the bottomless pits get here."

Emma giggled at her sister's joke. "Matt eats more than anyone."

Coming down the stairs into the den with a box full of wedding paraphernalia, Sarah caught the tail-end of the conversation. "Good morning, Lauren and Emma." She smiled distractedly as she searched through her box. "Don't bother saving anything for the guys. They're eating breakfast right now, then cleaning up the apartment before they come over."

"How can you look so bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, Sarah?"

"I slept seven hours. It's going on ten o'clock."

Lee yawned. "You even ran on the treadmill this morning."

"Someone who ate far too much sugar last night kept me up until well past two." Lauren scowled at her younger sister.

"Aw, it's good practice for when you pull graveyard shifts."

Lee stood up from the table and took his cup to the sink. "You're going into nursing, right, Lauren?"

"Yes, Sir." Lauren sat down at the table and took a few spoonfuls of sliced fruit from the bowl in the middle of the table.

Emma sat down and followed her sister's lead.

"Well, if you're anything like your brother, you'll do fine." He watched as Sarah brought another box into the den, and then came into the kitchen and filled a plate with food. "Not that I would ever complain about your appetite, but I thought you already ate."

"I just had a little bit to tide me over. I was waiting for Emma and Lauren."

Amanda went to the refrigerator and took out the pitcher of juice. She sat back down after setting it on the table and glanced over at Sarah. She was secretly glad that Sarah had a healthy appetite once again, but she did not say anything. "Now, we should talk about what's going on today." She pulled out a notepad. "Lee, don't forget that we are meeting Emily, Tristan, and Margaret at the hotel for lunch. They'll be joining us at the rehearsal dinner this evening." Amanda looked at Sarah once again. "You can start decorating the church if you get there for the rehearsal before me."

"Which is at four-thirty. I just brought down the two boxes for the church."

"Cheryl said we can be there at three o'clock. Sharon texted me earlier. She confirmed with the restaurant for the rehearsal dinner. They have the room set aside at six-thirty."

"You called the florist?"

Lee retreated to his office. He had hoped for a little time alone with Sarah sometime today, but it had not looked hopeful. Amanda had stacks of sandwiches in the refrigerator, ready for some outing that had been planned. Sarah was to join the Grangers and the family friends who were in town. Was it lunch at some park near the church? And now she and Sarah were down to business. He read through his emails and had started going over news reports when he felt a pair of hands on his shoulders.

"All those girls in one room just a bit overwhelming for you, Daddy?"

Smiling, he turned to face his daughter. "I was hoping we could spend a little time alone before we all go our separate ways. I have a gift for you."

Sarah took the arm of the chair nearby and pulled it towards Lee before sitting in it.

Reaching into one of the bottom drawers of the desk, Lee took out a journal and a small jewelry box. "These were my mother's."

Sarah took the box and the journal and set them on her lap. Picking up the journal, she flipped through it carefully. "Oh, this is a treasure. It tells about living in London during the war. And…" She read a few lines more carefully. "…was she talking about working with your father? It says something about a package." Looking up at Lee, she searched his face.

"Yes. You know all about that—I'll never forget the expression on your face when we told you." His eyes twinkled at the recollection of sharing the story with Sarah and Matt for the first time so many months ago. He grew thoughtful and sat back in his chair after a moment. Lee seemed nonchalant, but Sarah thought she detected a little moisture in his eyes. He passed a hand over his face, and then his mood brightened once again. "I thought since you're starting with the Agency soon, it was a good time for you to be able to read her journal. I'm hoping you might find a little wisdom on those pages. Not as good as having Mum for a grandmother in person, but…"

It was Sarah's turn to tear up, but Lee put a hand out. His words were gently teasing. "Now before you start getting too sentimental, look in the box."

Obediently, Sarah opened the box. Inside was a delicate pearl bracelet. The pearls were not large, but the clasp was old-fashioned, lending a classic look to the piece.

"I'm pretty sure the story goes that Dad gave that to Mum when they found out they were expecting me. It's in the journal. Mum did not have many pieces of fine jewelry—your mom has most of what she did have. I have their wedding rings. Someday we'll give you all of that. But for now, your mom and I thought you could wear the bracelet on your wedding day. We had it restrung and the clasp was re-soldered, so you should get years of wear out of it."

"Oh, Daddy. It's beautiful. Thank you for these treasures. I love them." She sat, staring down at the pearls that now graced her wrist.

"It's my pleasure."

"You know, this can be my 'something old.'"

"Now, it's not even a year older than me." Lee pretended to be affronted, but Sarah was already throwing her arms around her father.

"You know, something old, something new…"

"…something borrowed, something blue." Amanda spoke from the doorway. "I guess you'll wear those lovely sapphire and diamond earrings Matt gave you. And you're borrowing the combs we'll use to keep the veil in your hair. Jennifer plans to bring them today." She came in and managed a quick three-way hug before returning to the kitchen.

Sitting back down in the chair, Sarah put the bracelet away carefully and then looked through the journal once again. "This really means a lot, Daddy. Thank you again. I'll ask Matt to take this back to the townhouse and put it in a safe place."

The front doorbell signaled the end of their father-daughter time.

"That would be Matt and the other guys." Sarah rose from her chair and gave her father a kiss on the cheek. "I love you, Daddy. Like I said, I'll always treasure these things."

Lee pretended to busy himself with his computer, but he made sure Sarah heard him before she left the room. "I love you, too, Pumpkin."

SMKSMKSMKSMKSMKSMK

Later that evening, Lee pulled the BMW sedan into the driveway on Maplewood. While Lee helped Amanda from the car, Matt whispered to Sarah in the backseat. "I have something for you."

"And I have something for you." As Sarah got out of the car, she glanced over at Matt's sisters and his two friends, who were walking up the stairs to the apartment. "Let's go into the living room in the house. Mom and Daddy said something about going straight upstairs to bed."

"Brian and Josh said they'd visit with the girls for a few minutes to give us a little time." He held the door to the house open for her.

"And I'm sure they didn't mind driving back from the rehearsal dinner in your car." Sarah laughed a little as she walked inside.

He grinned back at her. "Nope. Brian likes driving the Charger. You know, I think Brian and Lauren may be getting pretty serious, although Emma and Josh are taking it slow."

"Emma is still pretty young. But I really like Josh with her. They complement one another. She's more mellow around him and he opens up more with her there."

"Yeah. I guess you're right. He's open with me, so I don't notice it as much." He went to the side table and turned on a lamp before turning to her. "You know, it was pretty neat to meet Lady Farnsworth. She's the kind of person that made me want to be an operative. She's a real professional. Old school—classy and uses her brains."

"But knowing you, I'm pretty sure you also wanted to be an operative because of the action. Emily had her hands full with my dad when he first started out. He wanted too much action."

"Your mom says that she had some close calls with Emily, too." He sat down next to Sarah on the couch and took her hand, fingering her ring. "You looked lovely today. It was just the rehearsal, but I can't tell you how I felt, watching you walk up the aisle to Debussy, then standing with you at the front of the church."

"It's really happening." Her eyes shone as she looked back at Matt and placed her hands on his forearms.

Matt took a deep breath, sighing a little as he exhaled. "Oh, I love it when you look at me like that." He kissed her gently.

Footsteps on the floor above them reminded Matt of the reason he had come inside the house. He reached inside his jacket and pulled out a velvet-covered box. "I've been saving this for a wedding present."

The familiar-looking box piqued Sarah's curiosity. _Oh yes!_ She had another one upstairs. She opened this box and looked inside. Nestled in the satin lining was a sapphire and diamond necklace, the stones and pendant matching the earrings Matt had given her the night of the museum gala. "Oh," she breathed, taking out the necklace. "It really is very nice. I can wear it tomorrow with the earrings." She leaned over to Matt and kissed him. "Thank you, my love." She handed him the necklace and turned around, lifting her hair so he could place it on her neck.

Once the clasp was fastened, Matt bent his head to kiss the nape of Sarah's neck. His hand came up, but he pulled it away again, feeling the familiar tremor that came with resisting the urge to carry things further with her. _Just one more night, Granger. Keep this sweet and innocent._

Seemingly oblivious to his brief struggle, Sarah leaned towards the side table and opened the drawer. She took out another jewelry box, this one tied with a simple satin bow. She turned back to Matt. "This is for you."

Matt untied the ribbon and removed the lid from the box. Inside were studs and cufflinks for Matt's tuxedo. Rather than the usual enamel or mother-of-pearl, the jeweler had set a lapis lazuli stone in each sterling silver piece. Matt held them under the lamp in order to admire them.

"I hope they aren't too showy. I had them custom-made so they would sort of match my sapphire earrings. The jeweler used dark stones and polished them up a bit so they would look okay with a tux."

"Sarah, I love these. Blue is my favorite color. They're not showy at all. In fact, I love how they're not quite as fancy as the black ones I've been wearing. They have a Texas feel."

"Oh, good. I'm so glad you like them. I was hoping you'd think they were sort of a Texas thing."

"As I said, I love them. What a great gift." He held them closer to the lamp and admired them again. "Thank you, Sweetie." He leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. After making sure the set was stowed carefully in his jacket pocket, Matt stood, pulling Sarah up with him.

She ran her hands over his jacket, enjoying the feel of the leather, and then slipped her hands inside and around his waist. "Mmm. You know, I love it when you wear this jacket. Your aftershave smells so good with the leather."

Matt let out his breath. His voice was husky. "Oh, what I'm feeling for you right now, Sarah Stetson."

Feeling him trembling slightly, Sarah regretted being quite so affectionate. "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize." He kissed her hair and held her closely. "Tomorrow night will be very nice."

"I love you."

"I love you, too." His arms relaxed in their embrace. "I really should go. Brian or Josh will start knocking on the back door or your parents will come downstairs."

Sarah stepped away from Matt and picked up her box. "I'm going to feel so elegant with the jewelry you and Daddy gave me."

"You will be the most beautiful bride ever."

Sarah followed Matt to the back door. "You're not biased, though."

"Nope." He tipped her chin up with his finger so he could kiss her more easily. "Sleep well, Beloved. I will see you at the altar."

"I'll be there." She smiled softly at him. "Just one more…"

"…day." He returned the smile and stepped out into the chilly night.

After Sarah locked the door and set the alarm, she went to the stairs. She could hear male voices outside on the driveway, then the sound of the Charger as it started up.

A shadow moved at the top of the stairs. Sarah came around the landing and saw her father and mother standing outside her bedroom door. They were in their robes, ready for bed.

"We thought we'd say goodnight." Lee's voice was gruff.

"Thank you again for the gifts, Daddy." She gestured to the diamonds and sapphires about her neck. "Matt gave me a necklace to match the earrings."

"It looks lovely on you, Sweetheart." Amanda embraced Sarah, smoothing her hair before she pulled away. "We want you to know how proud we are of you. The wedding is going to be perfect."

"Thanks, Mom. You had a big part in that."

"Cheryl helped, too."

"Well, we should let you get some sleep. Love you, Pumpkin."

Suddenly Sarah felt an overwhelming emotion rise up inside of her. From now on, Matt would be her closest family. She would not be losing her parents, but things would never be quite the same. Her eyes glistened as she reached for the two of them at the same time. "I love you both, so much."

Then she was pulling away, stepping into her room before she began crying and creating a scene. But as she glanced back to see her parents go into their bedroom, she saw her father's arm wrapped around her mother's shoulders.


	15. Chapter 15

As Matt had expected, the day had dragged. He and Sarah had gone along with the age-old notion of staying apart until the ceremony. Sarah had explained that it was an ancient custom taken from the times of feuding warlords, when the bride and groom might not even meet for the first time until the actual marriage ceremony. Not every bride was visually appealing to her future husband. In order to prevent the groom from reneging on any arrangements, the groom was not allowed to see the bride until they met at the altar, and even then, she would be covered with a veil until the ceremony concluded and the couple were officially married.

Matt thought it was a silly custom, not in keeping with the Christian teachings of their church. "I've told you many times how beautiful you are. Inside and out. I still feel the same way."

But Pastor Carlson had prevailed upon Matt. Even Cheryl, an old friend of the Stetsons, fellow church member, and their wedding organizer, had used her powers of persuasion. "Think of your mothers—the tradition is important to them. And it will make it all the more special when you first see Sarah walking down the aisle toward you."

"I won't be wearing a veil over my face, Matt. We got one that hangs down my back, over my hair."

That appealed to Matt, so he stopped arguing. Besides, the ceremony was scheduled for two o'clock. Early enough so he and Sarah could hopefully avoid icy roads out to the cabin later that night, but late enough that they could have dancing and an early dinner for the guests. He would not have to wait all day to see his bride.

But he did insist on his choice for the wedding "march," which would not be a march at all, in his mind. The piece he had chosen was lovely, like the woman he was marrying, and he wanted everyone to hear that music when they saw her stepping gracefully down the aisle.

That morning, after Brian, Josh, and Matt packed their suitcases in the car, Matt had excused himself to go back into the house.

"Sure, Man. But you've already checked that tuxedo about a zillion times. That box Sarah gave you is in your athletic bag, along with the rings. The skis are in the car…"

"I'll just be a minute, Brian. I'm checking the apartment, not my stuff."

Matt walked around the townhouse one last time. He wanted it to be perfect when he brought Sarah home after the honeymoon. He ran the disposal one more time and checked the refrigerator. _Enough food for the first day back, but nothing that could spoil._ The card he had bought for Sarah, welcoming her to her new home, was on her bedside table next to her framed photo from their first date. He had taken his copy of the photo, which used to sit on his bedside table, and put it on his desk at work.

A thrill coursed through him. _This is it. If I can just get through the next few hours until we're really married and the rings are on our fingers…_

Once in the car, he found he was still nervous. He tried to make small talk to take his mind off of things. "You two don't mind going to the hotel tonight? You could have stayed at the townhouse."

"Nah. It's easier this way. Your folks have that minivan that seats eight. Besides, your sisters will be at the hotel, too. We plan to hit the bar, maybe the pool…"

"Emma is too young for the bar, Brian. We talked about this."

Brian made a face at Josh, but Matt grinned. He liked the idea of Josh being "friends" with his little sister, despite their four-year age difference. He was what Brian and Lauren called a "stick in the mud" at times, but twenty year-old Emma, who was bubbly and full of energy, seemed strangely attracted to Josh now that they had spent more time together. _Maybe like Mom was attracted to Dad. Or Sarah was to me_, he thought ruefully. _And maybe the perfect person to help settle her down a little._

"You're pretty quiet there, Matt. Second thoughts?" Brian, who was riding shotgun, raised his eyebrows at Matt playfully.

"Never. I'm just ticking off the time until the ceremony."

"Let's stop and get some burgers. Forget the sandwiches the ladies are having at the church. We need some man-food."

"I'm game."

When both of the men in the front seat cast glances back at Josh, he grew a little defensive. "What? The girls will be busy, and I'm starved. That was a good breakfast, Matt, but I ran on your treadmill."

"There's a great burger place on the way. Sometimes I take Sarah there after our Saturday run."

The burger run helped tick off some time, but Matt was eager to be at the church, so they did not stay long. His father was getting something from the minivan when they pulled into the nearly empty parking lot, so transferring Brian and Josh's luggage was easy.

"Good timing, Dad. I hope everything else goes this smoothly." He looked up at the sky as he spoke. "The weather is perfect."

"Oh, better say a prayer, Son. Your future wife is trying to calm your future mother-in-law. The flowers are delayed."

"I should go in there and offer to call the place."

"Forget it. They have it covered. That friend of yours, Cheryl, has already harassed the florist. They'll be here. But there may be a few guests arriving by the time they do."

Matt blew out his breath. "But Sarah is okay with it?"

"Yep. Everything else seems to be going okay. I need to get these bags inside for your sisters. There's some red-headed gal in there doing make up and who knows what else."

"Ah. That would be Nikki. Very red hair?"

"Yep. Watch out for her, Son. She was joking with Sarah about trading places today."

"Oh, she's harmless."

"Uh huh." David gave Matt a look over his glasses. "I know you. She probably embarrassed you with some flirty comment." He laughed and turned to go into the church.

Matt could not think of a rejoinder, so he turned back to the Charger and started gathering his tuxedo and the other things he would need to get dressed.

A half an hour later Matt was dressed for the wedding. He had stowed the casual clothes he had worn to the church in the suitcase he and Sarah would share on their trip. He wandered around outside the building with Brian, Josh, and his grandfather, enjoying the fresh air. When Jamie and Jennifer showed up with the wedding photographer, Matt was grateful for the diversion. The man came recommended by not only Jamie and Jennifer, but by several friends from their photography club. He was all business as he began preparing his equipment. He would take photos of the male members of the wedding party and some of the friends and relatives before the wedding ceremony, then the rest of the photos afterwards.

In the bridal room, Amanda was pinning the flowered lace veil over the loose curls Vikki had styled for Sarah. Trying to ward off a severe case of nerves, Sarah concentrated on the others in the room. She looked in the mirror at her mother.

"Mom, that dress really does look nice on you. I've always loved it when you wore that shade of blue." Sarah admired the long-sleeved silk dress. It had an open neckline with a collar that gave it a bit of a retro look. She had persuaded her mother to purchase it, thinking it gave her an air of elegance. Her father liked it, too. She smiled to herself when she remembered his long, low wolf whistle as Amanda had stepped out of their bedroom that morning.

"Thank you." Amanda chuckled as she regarded her daughter. "You know, I remember you used to lie on the floor of our bedroom when you were little, watching me do my hair before embassy functions and that sort of thing. You were just a little girl, but you loved watching me get dressed for those formal events."

Sarah laughed in return. "I did love it. Now you're dressing me up."

The veil in place, she turned to watch Vikki make the final touches to Lauren's hair. "I hope you don't mind wearing blue. You can blame your brother. He loves blue, so…"

"It's very nice for a bridesmaid's dress. I actually plan to wear it again. Brian has invited me to some anniversary party for his aunt and uncle next month. It's black tie." Lauren glanced down at the ice blue dress with the watered silk bodice and chiffon skirt. "I never would have thought of this color, but Em and I look pretty good in it."

Jessica, the flower girl, was sitting as quietly as she could, trying not to mess her hair or dress. She had a younger version of the bridesmaid dresses-hers had white lace and darker blue trim.

Just then Sharon Granger and her mother, Florence, came into the room with the florist. Sharon took in Lauren and Emily's hair and dresses, then Jessica's. "Oh my. You girls are just lovely." She walked over to Sarah and offered a smile of approval. "And Sarah, you are a vision. I'm so glad you decided to wear the veil like that." She went to the window and peeked out. "The men are posing for photos outside. If you look out the window, you should be able to see them. We made sure they had their boutonnieres for the photos."

While the florist organized the women's flowers, Sarah went to the window and watched as Matt posed with Brian and Josh, then his dad and grandfather. Her own father and her brothers also joined in some of the photos. She felt a hand on her arm.

"Sweetheart, you haven't eaten a thing since breakfast. Can I give you a few bites of sandwich?"

Turning to her mother, Sarah wanted to please her, but her stomach was in knots. She did not want to be ill if the food did not go down well. "I'll be okay, Mom. Those protein shakes keep me going a long time."

"Everyone gets a case of the nerves. Just focus on Matt when you walk down the aisle. I have it on good authority that he's more nervous than you, getting up in front of all of these people. You won't want to show him you're nervous, too." Florence did not beat around the bush. She patted Sarah's hand. "You look just lovely, dear."

Amanda handed her daughter a cup of water with a lid and a straw so she would not risk spilling on her gown or mussing her makeup. "At least drink this."

Sharon put her arm around Sarah's waist. "Would it be okay if I prayed, dear?"

Sarah leaned into the hug. "Oh, I'd love that. Thanks."

The men's photo session over, the photographer ventured to the bride's room to take a few candid photos. The men, no longer occupied, wandered toward the sanctuary, but Pastor Carlson stopped Matt, Brian, and Josh. "Let's go wait in my office. Cheryl will be glad to know we're all in one place."

Brian was quick to chime in. "Matt could use some prayer right now. He's a bundle of nerves."

Finally, at one fifty-five, Cheryl came to check on the men corralled by the pastor's office. "Wait here, then at two-o'clock, when the music starts for the mothers, walk through the door to your places, just like I showed you. And don't forget to close the door after you. Quietly." She offered them a smile, and then went off to help the rest of the wedding party.

Brian cracked the door and gave them updates. "There are a few stragglers still coming in. Looks like we'll need to give them a couple of minutes." He shut the door again. "Not bad, Matt. Your side of the church has just as many people as Sarah's side."

"You probably don't even know which side is which. And no one cares anymore." He ran a shaking hand over his hair.

Josh laughed a little at Matt's ribbing. "Take it easy, Matt. In a few minutes you'll be busy staring at your woman, and nothing else will matter."

Pastor Carlson put a calming hand on Matt's shoulder. "Even the most confident grooms get a little nervous about now. You'll be fine."

A few long minutes later the music, an instrumental version of one of Matt and Sarah's favorite hymns, started. Cheryl appeared at the end of the hallway to check on the men just as Pastor Carlson was leading Matt and his groomsmen into the sanctuary.

Despite the coolness of the day and Pastor Carlson's reassurances, Matt felt his palms sweating as he took his place at the front of the church. Not comfortable getting up in front of people, he was definitely in the spotlight until Sarah showed up. He had known when he and Sarah had begun planning this wedding that they would have perhaps one hundred guests—almost like a regular crowd for their church—but he had thought it might be easier because of the occasion. Now he found that he had to use his operative training in order to maintain a calm demeanor and smile pleasantly. He watched his mother, in a demure pale pink silk, then his grandmother, in a new teal green suit, as they were escorted to their seats. When Phillip brought Amanda to her seat, Matt caught her smile of reassurance and was able to smile back.

The pianist let the hymn drift off, and now the sweet sounds of Debussy floated through the sanctuary. Matt smiled encouragingly as Emma, carrying her bouquet, walked slowly down the aisle. Matt felt another rush of nerves as Lauren came down the aisle, but she smiled and gave her brother a surreptitious thumbs up as she took her place on the steps nearby. Jessica was too busy carefully scattering rose petals to notice Matt smile at her.

Now the music swelled a little, and Matt watched as first Lee stepped into view, then Sarah. Matt thought that after the rehearsal, he would be prepared for the feelings that washed over him, but he was not. He could not take his eyes off of his bride. She wore her hair down with just a few strands at the sides of her face pinned back with the veil. Remembering his father's and grandfather's advice to get a good look at the gown, he took a moment to memorize its details. It was a soft white color; the fitted three quarter length sleeves and bodice were made of flowered French lace, and the skirt was of filmy chiffon that seemed to float around her. The neckline of the dress fell off of Sarah's shoulders and dipped just enough in front to accent the sapphire necklace. She truly was a lovely bride, and Matt could not help but feel a sense of pride in her.

But it was the expression on her face that struck him as Sarah, leaning a little into her father's arm, walked slowly down the aisle to the music. Her eyes were shining, focused only on him. Her air of confidence and her expression of love warmed his heart, and he found he was no longer nervous.

Then Lee and Sarah were standing in front of him and Pastor Carlson was asking, "Who gives this woman to this man in marriage?"

Lee's gravelly voice boomed through the sanctuary. "Her mother and I do." He bent to kiss Sarah on the cheek, winked at Matt, and went to his seat beside Amanda, taking Amanda's hand on his arm as he sat down.

Lauren stepped forward to take Sarah's bouquet of roses, and then Sarah tucked her hand into the crook of Matt's arm. They glanced at one another, smiling briefly, before they stepped up to face Pastor Carlson.

The pastor greeted the guests, and Matt felt Sarah lean lightly against him. They continued to steal glances at one another until the first hymn was sung. Then Matt found himself focusing on the ceremony, the Bible reading, and the pastor's message. He had almost forgotten the congregation of guests behind him. It was as if he and Sarah were standing alone before their trusted counselor. All too soon he was facing Sarah, holding her smaller hands in his as he said his vows to her. He felt his heart swell as he promised to love and to cherish her—he had heard others say similar words before, but now, at his own wedding, they were so much more meaningful. He would always love and cherish her, no matter what life brought them. God was there, so they would be a strand of three cords.

Sarah's eyes searched Matt's as she said her vows to him. He felt her grip his hands and heard the earnestness in her voice.

After they went to the altar and took communion together, Brian stepped forward with the rings, and soon they were reciting more vows to one another, each promising to allow their ring to be a lasting reminder of their love and commitment to one another.

Amanda had been dabbing her cheeks with a tissue throughout the ceremony, and now Matt saw his mother doing the same. He smiled down at Sarah, who seemed like she wanted her own tissue as tears glistened in her eyes.

Then Pastor Carlson was looking at both of them. "And now, by the power invested in me by the state of Virginia, I hereby pronounce you husband and wife." He turned to Matt. "You may kiss the bride."

Matt felt Sarah's hands rest lightly on his upper arms as he placed his hands on her waist and bent to kiss her. It was light and gentle, but he let his lips linger just long enough to savor the moment. Thinking about this kiss countless times over the last several weeks, Matt had been worried that it would be awkward in front of so many people, but he was surprised at how natural it felt.

Before Matt could focus on Sarah again, Pastor Carlson was announcing the couple. "Family and friends, I present to you Mr. and Mrs. Matthew Granger."

The guests were just a blur as Matt, beaming with joy, escorted an equally joyous Sarah down the aisle. Soon they were in the bride's room, alone for just a moment. Overwhelmed, Sarah could not think of anything to say as her eyes met Matt's.

"Oh, my beloved Mrs. Granger. You are gorgeous." He took her in his arms and held her close, kissing her more fervently than he had at the front of the church.

"You two need to get a room. Oh wait. You have a whole cabin."

Matt's eyes met Sarah's again as they ignored Lauren's teasing. Sarah stood on her tiptoes and whispered in Matt's ear, "You look very dashing yourself, my husband. And I loved the expression on your face when I came down the aisle. All of my nervousness went away because you looked so happy."

He answered her quietly. "I was nervous, too, in front of all of those people. Then when you leaned on my arm, I forgot about everyone else."

Jennifer's voice broke into their private conversation. "The photographer is ready for you and Pastor Carlson has the marriage certificate for you to sign. Let's try to make this quick—we don't want to keep people waiting at the reception. Cheryl has already gone on ahead."

The newlyweds signed the certificate, with Lauren and Brian as their witnesses. After the room had emptied of everyone except Matt, Sarah, and Pastor Carlson, he put his hands on their shoulders. "I could not say this in front of the crowd, but out of all the weddings I have officiated, this one brings me perhaps the most pleasure. I've really seen how the Lord has done a lot of work in your lives—brought a lot of healing and joy. God bless you both."

Still overwhelmed from the ceremony, Sarah could only smile and offer a quiet thank you, while Matt gave their pastor a quick hug around the shoulders and thanked him, too. Then it was just Matt and Sarah in the room.

Matt put his hand on the small of Sarah's back to guide her to the door, but she stopped him. "Wait. I need to do something before I forget." She pulled the engagement ring off of her right hand, where she had placed it before the ceremony, and slid it back onto her left hand so it could join the wedding ring Matt had slipped onto her finger only a few minutes before. She held her hand out so she could admire the set. "I love how the band fits with the ring your mom designed, Matt."

He took her hand so he could get a better look at the rings, but Jennifer was back, her eyebrows raised.

"Sorry. We're on our way." Finally, they went out to the sanctuary.

Sarah spoke quickly, before the others could hear her. "Thanks for putting up with all of this pomp and circumstance, Matt. I hope you aren't wishing we eloped."

He whispered back, "I'm so happy right now, I don't care. And I'm looking forward to sashaying with you around the dance floor."

The photographer did his job with the formal photos quickly. Soon Matt and Sarah, her hand resting on his arm, were making their grand entrance at the reception, held at a country club a few miles down the road. While the guests indulged in appetizers and champagne, Matt and Sarah mingled purposefully, determined to greet everyone before dinner was served. Sometimes Matt sensed Sarah's embarrassment—more than one of her parents' friends had commented on how much she had grown up and how young she was to be getting married. They were both relieved when Francine and Efraim Beaman treated them like colleagues. Gil Barclay and his wife Maureen were equally gracious.

Emily Farnsworth could barely contain her delight. "Oh, Sarah. What a pleasure it is to see you married to such a fine young man. You know, I thought I'd have to hit your father over the head before he would admit he loved your mother. Thankfully you have your mother's sense in that department." She smiled indulgently as Sarah blushed.

Turning to Matt, she placed a hand on his arm and leaned towards him conspiratorially. "I've been watching your progress, young man. You made quite a name for yourself before you even came to your current position. You'll be hearing from me if my team ever needs some assistance here in Washington."

It was Matt's turn to blush. "I'd be honored, Lady Farnsworth. But surely you are being overly kind."

"I try to be kind, but I never exaggerate. I've mentored many a young…" she looked around to be certain no one was listening to their conversation except perhaps her team leader and bodyguard, Tristan Bates, who hovered not far away. "…agent. I'd love to have a chance to work with you sometime. The Stetson family is very special to me."

When it was finally time to sit down, Sarah was weary. Matt leaned over to whisper in her ear. "Did you eat today?"

She glanced at him guiltily. "I had breakfast. Mom sat me down and made me a smoothie and gave me one of the muffins she baked for our little 'going away' bag."

"There were sandwiches at the church. Did you eat one?"

"No. I was too nervous. But I heard you had a burger." She grinned at him. "Being kind of casual, stopping for fast food on the way to church, eh Granger?"

"You know me. Always hungry." He smiled, but took her hand. "Please relax and take your time with the meal, Sweetie. It's going to be a long evening and you already seem kind of tired." Just as he finished speaking, a server brought plates to the couple.

Knowing he was right and feeling badly that she had Matt worried about her within a few hours of saying, "I do," Sarah did her best to finish her dinner.

Three times during the meal, they heard spoons clattering against the water glasses, and Matt was only too happy to oblige his friends with a kiss to his new bride. After the third time, Sarah laughed. "For someone who was feeling shy in front of the crowd, you're not having any trouble with these kisses. Is it the champagne?"

"Well, I do enjoy kissing you, but I also don't want the guys in the bullpen to harass me any more than they will after they hear the first song."

"Oh, is that Rene starting up the spoon on the glass thing?"

"Either him or Johnson."

The D.J. arriving at his booth signaled the imminence of the first dance. But before they could begin the next phase of the reception, Brian stood up and led a toast.

"I wasn't sure what to expect when my best buddy said he was bringing his future wife home for Thanksgiving. But as usual, Matt went above and beyond, finding himself the perfect match. I couldn't be happier for you, my friend. May the Lord bless you both with many happy years together…and lots of kids." At Brian's mischievous grin, there were answering snickers around the room. Sarah thought she heard Matt's friend Kate comment to her fiancé Micah a few tables away, but she could not make out the words.

After the champagne flutes stopped clinking, Lee stood up, turning to Matt. "When I first hired you, Matt, I never dreamed you would ask me for permission to date my daughter, let alone ask for her hand in marriage. But you've proven time and again that you are more than worthy of Sarah. Both Amanda and I are more than proud to have you as a member of our family. Here's to you, Son, and to our daughter. May you have a long and happy marriage."

Once again the champagne glasses around the room touched, and David stood up for the last toast. He turned to Lee and Amanda. "To the Stetsons, for raising a lovely daughter, and to my son, for having the wherewithal to recognize the perfect partner in Sarah. And finally to Sarah, for having the grace to embrace our family as her own, warts and all. And I'm referring to myself when I say warts." After the chuckling ended, he continued, "Sharon and I both love you like a daughter, my dear. Welcome to our family."

When the toasting began, Sarah had gripped Matt's hand under the table, but by the end she was leaning against his shoulder, trying in vain to swipe away the tears on her face. She got up and hugged her father-in-law, then gratefully accepted a tissue from Sharon.

Matt had indeed chosen the song for the first dance. It was what his grandfather would call a little schmaltzy and it had a definite country twang to it. He knew he would be ribbed by the other agents and perhaps some of his other friends, but he decided that if he could face the Taliban on their own turf, he could face some teasing from the same people who had shown they would cover his back in a crisis.

As the first strains of Scotty McCreery's "I Love You This Big" sounded from the speakers, Matt rose from his seat and took Sarah's hand. He grinned as he took her in his arms on the dance floor. "I know it's sappy, but it's how I feel about you."

Sarah had heard the song before, but she listened more carefully to the lyrics this time.

"I'll love you to the moon and back

I'll love you all the time

Deeper than the ocean

And higher than the pines…"

Grinning back, she let him lead her about the floor. "It _is_ sappy, but I love you for choosing it. I feel the same way." Partway through the song, the D.J. encouraged the other married couples to join Matt and Sarah.

"I love you this big

Eyes have never seen this big

No one's ever dreamed this big

And I'll spend the rest of my life

Explaining what words cannot describe but I'll try

I love you this big."

The floor cleared once the song was over. Now it was time for Lee's dance with Sarah. Lee's dimple was evident as he took his daughter's hand. As they danced, Michael Buble's cover of Frank Sinatra's "You Make Me Feel So Young" filled the room while a slide show of highlights of Sarah's childhood flashed on a screen behind the bridal party's table. After a minute or two, Matt led his mother out onto the floor as the slide show switched to photos from his childhood.

The slide show changed to photos of Sarah and Matt together as Sinatra's "The Way You Look Tonight" came through the speakers. Lee paired up with Amanda, David found Sharon, and Matt led Sarah around the floor before other couples joined them.

"Lovely, never, ever change.

Keep that breathless charm.

Won't you please arrange it?

Cause I love you, just the way you look tonight."

More Sinatra music floated over the room, then the D.J. added in some more Buble and the occasional modern dance tune as Matt danced with Amanda and Sarah danced with David. Soon William, then Jamie, then Phillip were asking to dance with the bride as Matt danced with the women in his family.

Sarah had to admit she was ready to take a break when it was time to cut the cake. Her heels were not as high as some of those the guests wore, but her shoes were beginning to pinch a little. Except for dinner, she had not been off of her feet since she put the shoes on hours earlier. She would be glad to sit down after she and Matt went through the ritual of feeding each other a bite of the cake. Rene was quick to tease when they each fit the bite of cake neatly into the other's mouth.

"Aw, Granger. You two are no fun."

Matt winked at his partner and surprised Sarah with a kiss on the mouth. He smiled at her, speaking in her ear as they went back to their table. "You taste good. Vanilla with raspberry."

Sarah colored a little, but she bantered back, "You might kiss me a little longer if I have a piece of the chocolate."

"Well, I hope you asked for some, then." His eyes were twinkling. This time Sarah did not color, but something about his expression made her feel a warmth inside that she had only felt a few times before. She looked down shyly.

He wanted to ask her what she was thinking, but their cake had arrived and his grandparents were saying their goodbyes. The Beamans had offered to take them back to their hotel, and weary now, they were ready to go.

After people finished their dessert, some of the other older guests took the opportunity during the break in the dancing to say their goodbyes. When the dancing resumed, Leatherneck and his date had stayed, along with Matt's and Sarah's parents, and the remaining guests were mostly friends of the bride and groom.

Sarah's feet had recovered, so Matt took her back out onto the dance floor, where they joined their friends from dance class. The music, primarily popular tunes from the radio mixed with the occasional oldie, soon had the other guests on the floor, too. Phillip dragged his brother from his seat at a table, while Amy coaxed Jennifer out to dance with her husband.

"I have two left feet, Wormbrain, and you know it. I'll stomp all over Jennifer." Jamie was trying to stand his ground while playfully using an old taunting name from their childhood.

"It's okay, Jamie. No one is watching us dance. Let's have fun for Sarah's sake." At his wife imploring look, Jamie gave in, joining the crowd.

Lee sat at a table with Amanda, watching Leatherneck dance with his date, Callie. "The old coot's still got it in him." An Earth, Wind, and Fire song began playing, and no one left the dance floor. "Look at Sarah and Matt. I guess they have practiced quite a bit."

Amanda stood. "Come on, Scarecrow. We can dance to this one, too."

"You've got to be kidding me."

Amanda crossed her arms and tapped her foot. "It won't last forever."

Lee shook his head, but stood anyway. They joined their sons and daughters-in-law, with Lee taking some good-natured teasing from Leatherneck.

Dancing not far away, Matt bent his head to Sarah's ear. "Let's go tell the D.J. to play more of these oldies. It's fun to see your parents out here."

She laughed. "Yes, and maybe your parents will join us, too." She glanced toward Sharon, who was sipping some coffee, with David standing behind her chair. "I think your dad is tapping his foot."

After dancing their way over to the D.J., who easily agreed to queue up some more seventies and eighties music, the couple went to persuade David and Sharon to join them on the dance floor.

Sharon stood up immediately. "I'll come out there and dance with both of you, even if your father won't come."

David huffed good-naturedly. "All right. I'm coming out there."

A few songs later, Matt spoke in Sarah's ear again. "Ryan Johnson and Manny Gonzales are dancing with each other as much as they dance with their dates."

Sarah watched them for a minute while Matt led her around the floor. She giggled at the two agents. "Next time they rib you, you have something to dish back at them." She pointed her chin towards David and Sharon. "Your parents really know how to dance."

Feeling the chuckle rumble through his chest more than she could hear it, Sarah strained to hear his words.

"I think that's how my dad fell for my mom. He said something about her legs, too."

She leaned back a little to look in his face. At Sarah's expression, Matt continued. "I'm laughing because that first night at dance class made me realize how much I wanted more than friendship with you. Your legs had me even before that."

Reddening a little, Sarah mustered the nerve to reply. "Well, like father, like son." She leaned against him as the next number quieted the room and brought the sound level down a notch.

She felt his lips brush through the hair at the side of her face. His voice was husky as he spoke in her ear again. "I'd like to go soon, before we get too tired." He pulled away so he could look in her face. The intensity in his expression spoke volumes, giving her that warm feeling once again. She lowered her eyes, shy once more.

Moving to her side now, Matt wrapped an arm around his bride and walked with her to the table while their parents had reclaimed their seats.

Matt brought Sarah to her mother. "It's going on nine o'clock and I think the bride is wiped out."

Amanda stood up quickly. "I was wondering how long you two would hang in there. It's been a long day." She reached out a hand towards Sarah. "You just need to throw the bouquet and we can go take care of your dress. Your things are already in the dressing room."

Matt leaned in to speak to Lee quietly. "You sure you don't want me to have the D.J. close it down?"

"Nah. Make your getaway. Why do you think Leatherneck stayed behind? Between him, Amanda, and your dad, we've got it covered." Glancing out at the dance floor, he laughed. "Actually, Amanda could probably handle it all on her own."

Recalling more than one occasion where Amanda had used her authority during his freshman training, Matt laughed along with Lee as they followed the women over to some tables closer to the dance floor.

Standing off to the side, Matt watched as Sarah threw the bouquet over her shoulder to the young women who gathered behind her. He expected Jessica to make a dive for it, but Lauren reached up easily and caught it.

Josh elbowed Brian good-naturedly and Emma squealed with enthusiasm. Matt wondered if Brian had been ring-shopping, but he had been tight-lipped that week. When Matt had asked his old friend about his intentions, Brian had merely said, "It's your week, Buddy. Let's talk about your sister and me some other time."

Now Ryan Johnson was calling out loudly, "Granger, get the garter from your wife."

Matt was quick to reply. "There isn't a garter." Both Sarah and Matt had agreed not to follow the old custom. Matt wondered if Sarah had guessed that he had not wanted his fellow operatives, possibly drunk, to be ogling his wife as she lifted her wedding dress for Matt to take the garter. And the crude comments at the Agency in the weeks following could be even worse. At any rate, she had agreed quite readily to eschew the tradition.

For the moment, they endured some good-natured boos and commentary from Johnson and Gonzales as they made their way out of the ballroom and to the dressing rooms nearby.

Matt was leaning up against the wall outside the women's dressing room, his tuxedo in a garment bag and his athletic bag on the floor when Sarah came out wearing jeans, snow boots, and a ski jacket. She smiled shyly at Matt. "Not your usual going away outfit, but we are traveling to the mountains."

Amanda took Matt's garment bag and hung it next to Sarah's dress. "I'll have Lee take these to the car after you leave." She turned to her daughter and wrapped her arms around her. "I love you, Sweetheart." She offered her daughter a significant look. "Have a wonderful trip. Relax and enjoy yourselves."

Lee came into the hallway, followed by David and Sharon. "All set? Everyone is waiting to see you off."

David and Sharon said their goodbyes to Matt and Sarah. David took an extra moment with Sarah. "I meant what I said during that toast. I know you'll make my son very happy. Be sure to come visit us soon."

"They're coming in June, David, for my parents' anniversary."

"That's right."

As everyone started to move down the hall, Lee stopped Sarah, placing an arm about her shoulders. She responded by throwing herself against her father. "Thank you for everything."

Lee held his daughter tightly in his arms, then pulled away. "You need to go with your husband before you really do turn into a pumpkin, Cinderella."

"Daddy, that's not how the story goes."

"I know _that_," Lee growled. "God, I must have read that one to you about a million times. That's how you got your nickname."

Undaunted by his grousing, Sarah stood on her tiptoes and kissed her father's cheek. "I love you, Daddy."

"I love you, too, Pumpkin."

Matt waited at the end of the hallway, his hand held out for Sarah's.

"Is that really how you got your nickname?"

"You heard that?"

"That voice could be heard through the walls of his office when he was section chief."

Sarah giggled. "He never used that voice on me when he was truly mad. Only when he was pretending."

Matt brought her hand up to his lips and gave it a quick kiss. "Let's go on our honeymoon, Mrs. Granger."

After running the gauntlet of rose petals tossed by their guests, Matt helped Sarah into the Charger and climbed in the driver's side. Someone had used shaving cream to decorate the car with hearts and slogans like "Just Married." Seeing Phillip and Emma's expressions, Matt had no trouble guessing who had been behind it. He was glad that Phillip had used the shaving cream instead of the more durable window paint. Lee had already given him a heads up that there was a bucket and some rags at the cabin if he needed them.

Lee placed an arm around his wife's waist as they watched the car's taillights disappear. Since it was still relatively early in their minds, the other guests had gone back to the ballroom for some more dancing.

"You okay?" Amanda turned her head to peer into her husband's face. She could just make it out in the dim light near the curb.

"Oh, sure. We said our goodbyes inside. They'll only be gone a week and they're a short drive from the house."

"For someone who was moping about and having fits for the last several weeks, you're awfully cavalier."

"Hey, I've been a lot better since Sarah and I worked things out."

Amanda ran a hand over Lee's back. "Yeah, you have." She grew quiet, and despite the cold, did not move to go inside.

"I guess I should be asking you if you're okay." He turned her towards him, so they faced one another, and tipped her chin with his finger. The light from the club's entry lit Amanda's face, showing tears on her cheeks. "Aww, Amanda." His expression was tender as he looked into her eyes. Placing a hand on either side of her face, he ran his thumbs over her cheeks to wipe away the tears before drawing her into an embrace.

Resting her face against his chest, her voice was muffled a little by his tuxedo jacket. "When we were in the dressing room, Sarah was nervous about…well, you know. About tonight. It really hit me that our daughter is a grown woman, starting a very new chapter in her life. I guess I'm just being sentimental."

"He'll be good to her. He's already proven that."

"I know." Amanda was fairly certain that Lee was referring not only to the first night of their honeymoon but to the rest of Sarah's and Matt's lives. After another minute or two, Amanda pulled away. Lee reached into his pocket for his handkerchief and handed it to her. She took it gratefully. "I'm sure I've smudged my makeup."

"Not really. Besides, the mother of the bride is supposed to look like she's been crying." He offered her a crooked smile, his dimples evident and his eyes twinkling.

Amanda laughed softly as she bent her head and refolded the handkerchief. "And the father of the bride is not supposed to look nearly so dashing."

The opening notes of a Frank Sinatra tune drifted out of the building as a few couples, club members who had eaten their Saturday night meal out together in the dining room, made their way through the entry doors.

Bending his head so he could speak into her ear, Lee whispered, "Come dance with me, Beautiful."

"I'd love that." She took his hand, letting him lead her inside.

SMKSMKSMKSMKSMK

It did not take long before the Charger was on the highway leading to the cabin. Matt had been relieved when Lee and Amanda had offered it as their lodgings for the first night of their honeymoon. The drive to the airport would take less than an hour when it was time to leave for their noon flight, and they could have privacy their first night together.

Since it was still warm enough to avoid icing, they had stopped at a self-service car wash before leaving the city so Matt could hose off the Charger. After a few minutes they were back on the road.

He turned to Sarah briefly, taking her hand when he heard her sigh. "You're quiet."

"I'm enjoying the peacefulness of the car. It's just you and me, and a quiet country highway in the dark."

He pulled her hand to his lips, and then rested their clasped hands on his knee. "It is pretty nice. Close your eyes if you want. It's been a long day."

"Oh, I don't want to fall asleep on you. It's our honeymoon. And we haven't been to the cabin in the dark before."

"Well, if you do fall asleep, I'll wake you in time to give me a heads up on the turn." He glanced over at her again. Her eyes were turned to his, shining in the dim lights of the dashboard and the moonlight. He sighed a little, wishing they were already at the cabin. He remembered his father's advice. David had again drawn him aside for a brief talk the day before, reminding him of his words from their father-son talk at Thanksgiving. _"Take it slow."_

Matt concentrated on the road, eventually using both hands on the wheel as the country highway twisted and turned. He put a hand on Sarah's shoulder to wake her when he recognized the familiar landmarks near the cabin. Soon they were pulling up to the hidden getaway. A lone security light illuminated the gravel drive, revealing gray smudges of old snow around the edges of the cabin. Matt had known it would be a risk to plan a trip to any mountains, even the ones close to home, at this time of year, but thankfully they had good weather that night and more predicted for their travels tomorrow.

Moving slowly, Sarah yawned and stretched as Matt got out. The light by the door, tripped by his movement, now shone over the porch and steps. Matt placed the carry-on bags from the backseat of his car on the porch and quickly unlocked the door, reaching inside to punch the code on the alarm's keypad.

Before Sarah could open her car door, Matt had beaten her to it, offering his hand to help her. Once out of the car, she was barely standing before he lifted her into his arms and slammed the car door with his hip. Now she was wide awake. "Oh!" she cried.

He laughed at her surprise, his boots crunching heavily on the gravel as he took her to the porch steps.

Confused by his apparent gallantry, Sarah did not join in his amusement. "I can walk, you know."

"A proper groom carries the bride over the threshold. Just relax and enjoy it. I am." She wrapped her arms around his neck. "That's better."

He grinned at her as he set her down inside the door and went out to bring in their suitcases and the carry-on luggage.

Sarah busied herself with turning up the heat and quickly inspecting the cabin. While her father kept it in good condition, with well-sealed windows and doors, she had never forgotten the time, many years ago, when mice had tried to invade their rustic home away from home. Turning on the lights in the bedroom she always used, she had cried out in surprise and disgust when two of the creatures had scampered away. While Lee had quickly taken care of the nuisance, Sarah had always been leery of finding more of the little rodents. After checking all of the rooms, Sarah breathed a sigh of relief. Thankfully there were no mice to bother them tonight.

Matt was waiting, looking like he felt a little out of place, in the living room. Sarah assumed that he needed help finding his bearings. She fought her feelings of shyness and tried to remain practical. It was time to brush her teeth and change into the lingerie she had planned for that night. Sarah gestured to the door near her. "Um, do you want to use this bathroom? I'll go use my parents' bathroom."

"Sounds good."

Standing in her bra and panties, Sarah studied herself in her parents' full length mirror. What would Matt see tonight? Her nervousness and lack of appetite had whittled away at her figure, making her rather thin, but she was far from emaciated. And having Matt and her mother prompting her to eat at the meals they had shared over the last few days, the angles that had formed recently were softening once again. She tried to convince herself not to worry about it. _It's too late now, anyway._ She reached in her traveling kit and pulled out her toothbrush and toothpaste.

Dressed in pajama bottoms and a t-shirt, Matt had just finished lighting the last of the candles in the living room. A soft, candlelit glow came from the bedroom nearby and there was a fire blazing in the fireplace.

"Oh, this is so nice."

Turning at the sound of his new wife's voice, Matt found he had to remember to breathe. She was wearing a midnight blue satin and lace dressing gown, nothing at all like the thick robe he had seen her in at the safe house and again at his parents' home. He stepped over to her, letting his hands slip around her waist. There was not much on underneath the silky garment that accentuated her figure. "You are so lovely."

She ran her hands over his chest, eventually resting them on his shoulders. "And you are a very handsome man."

He bent his head to kiss her. It was a slow, gentle kiss that soon heated as his hands moved over her back, taking in the feel of her body, so lightly clothed, pressed up against his. They had not held one another like this before, but they had kissed like this once before. In his parent's barn. He pulled away just far enough to see her face. "You remembered to bring the honeymoon kiss."

Looking into his darkening eyes, Sarah suddenly felt shy.

As if sensing her mood, Matt let go of her and took her hand, leading her to the couch. They sat down there, side by side, their clasped hands resting once again on Matt's knee. "Can I ask you something?"

Sarah's shyness turned into nervousness. Was he wondering why she was hesitating? She was dressed for the occasion, after all. _Stop being a ninny. This is Matt. We've both been waiting for this. _"Sure."

"I noticed you and your mom giving each other looks before we left. What was that about?"

He felt her hand tense a little as he held it, and she sat up straighter. "Oh, we had a little heart-to-heart in the dressing room. The same thing we talked about weeks ago."

Matt was quiet, wondering if Sarah would share more. When she remained silent, he ventured, "Are you nervous, too?"

Her laugh sounded more like a release of tension than anything else. "Yes." She paused, considering her words. "Mom said not to expect our first time to be like a romantic movie or novel. Just think about the fact that we're together, and that neither one of us has to put on the brakes or go home." Sarah kept some of the advice to herself. Her mother's words echoed in her head. _"He's going to be as nervous as you are."_

Matt realized that Amanda's words were not very different from what his father's had been. _Don't rush things, Granger._ Turning to Sarah, he placed his free hand on her cheek and leaned towards her. "I like the way your mom thinks."

When they kissed again, Sarah's hands came up to cup Matt's face, then run through his hair. As they continued their kisses, somehow Sarah ended up in the corner of the couch, her back propped up against the cushion that rested against the arm of the sofa, and her legs draped over Matt's as he leaned over her. When he ran his hand along her bare thigh, a memory of the time last summer when he had touched her there flashed in her mind. She had been alarmed by her reaction then, grateful that the doorbell had rung, signaling the arrival of their Chinese food delivery.

This time, Matt did not pull his hand away, but rested it on her knee, looking into her eyes to gauge her reaction. Instead of urging him to slow down, as she had all those months ago, Sarah reached for the hem of Matt's shirt and began to pull it up. He helped her tug it over his head, and then he tossed it onto a chair nearby. Now she was running her hands over the bare skin of his back, holding him as he resumed kissing and caressing her once more. She did not stop Matt when he untied the belt of her robe and parted it.

Letting his eyes drift slowly over her, Matt took in the pale blue satin camisole and panties Sarah wore under her dressing gown. His voice husky now, he bent to kiss her neck and murmured in her ear. "So lovely. You are so beautiful." Slipping his hands under the fabric of her camisole, he caressed her smooth skin. "And so soft." His lips, kissing her jaw and neck at first, drifted down towards the camisole.

Sarah heard quiet moaning, and realized it was her. She tensed a little, wondering if Matt intended for their first time to be on the couch. She knew there might be an occasion when the family might gather here together, with her parents and her brothers and their wives sharing the couch and chairs. She could envision Matt sitting with her on the floor by the fireplace. She could not make love for the first time—or perhaps anytime—on this couch or in this room.

His hands had stopped and he had sat up a little, watching her face. He looked almost hurt. "What's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing's wrong." She ran her hands over his bare chest, watching her fingers sift through his light brown chest hair, trying to show him how much she desired him, too. "In fact, it's really nice. But…"

Matt pulled her up so they were sitting together. Her dressing gown was still open, but his hands were on her shoulders. "We should go in the bedroom. Is that it?"

"I feel funny going very far out here."

He smiled at her, reaching up to brush the hair away from her face. He let his fingers trail slowly down her cheek. "Of course. It wasn't my intention to do much more than kiss out here. I vowed to myself that I would take my time, not rushing you through this. I'm sorry."

"There's nothing to be sorry about. I don't feel rushed. I feel loved. I want you as much as you want me. We've waited a while for this."

Gently, he shifted her legs off of his lap and stood. Going to the fire, he turned off the gas and shut the flue. As the flames in the fireplace fluttered and died, he went to each of the candles and blew them out, seeming to take his time deliberately. Then he stepped over to Sarah and held out a hand to her. As she rose to her feet, he embraced her briefly, kissing first her forehead, then her cheeks, then her lips. His touch was tender, but Sarah could sense the intense longing was still there. She let the dressing gown, now falling off of her shoulders, slip down her arms and onto the couch.

Then Matt lifted her into his arms and kissed Sarah again. The longing was _definitely_ there. She sighed as he held her tightly against his bare chest. She brought her hands up and ran them through his hair while his lips drifted across her jaw and to her ear.

He spoke softly. "Beloved." When he kissed her neck, she sighed again. "I love it when you sigh like that."

Sarah found herself relaxing, a warm, tingly feeling spreading all the way to her toes and fingertips as Matt carried her to the bedroom. He hesitated at the threshold. Candles flickered on the bedside tables as air from the heating vents warmed the room. While Sarah had changed her clothes, Matt had turned down the bed. It looked inviting in the mellow candlelight.

Placing her arms about his neck, Sarah looked in her new husband's face, her eyes shining. "I love you, Mr. Granger."

That was all the encouragement Matt needed to continue over the threshold.


End file.
